Why is my sister-in-law to be ignoring me?

You are pointing out class and value differences that you seem able to describe, but haven't as yet fully digested. And you really did put your foot in it - albeit unwittingly - by commenting on how quickly they got married.

I happen to agree with you. But that is not the point. It is not about being right. It is not about your values or mine. It is about what they value, and being respected for that.

Have some empathy. You may not have intended to insult her. But you did. You rained on her parade - as truly humble and modest as it is - about her marriage.

Get a nice card. Apologize. Tell her you misspoke and are mortified. Wish her and her husband all the best. Include a gift - say a dinner certificate for two for a romantic evening at a nice restaurant. Then leave it alone. Don't expect to be forgiven - just leave it. She will likely come around if she senses genuine interest and support for her from you over time.

Next - don't contribute to family rifts. If you can't be supportive and help bring peace to this family, then mind your own business. Your husband-to-be will appreciate that.

Finally, and I do mean this nicely, get over yourself.

You have some typically middle class advantages (education, income, career). But you can show some real class by respecting other people from different backgrounds & walks of life. There is so much to respect and people appreciate and know when thats there, and not.

I think you need to do this for your future marriage too. However "right" you may feel, and however far your future husband moves up the ladder, he is going to know whether you respect his family - his roots and a part of who he is and will always be - or not.

Why does it matter what they earn, or their socal status? I can't even understand why that's even in here. You should have posted this.

My partners sister got married at 19 to a guy who she only knew for four months. I commented on how quick it was because I know better than her because she comes from a poor un-educated family which means they are all dumb. My partners sister in law then said that they agree that I am fake, and now they don't want to be in contact with me.

If I was them I wouldn't want to know you either. If she cared for you opinion she would have asked. Not everyone has to share the same point of view as you. You should aslo respect the fact that it is her life and it is up to her what decisions she makes, good or bad.

I hate you and I don't even know you. Do you want to know what I make per year, dolt?

For reals! After reading this who would? You seem to be very consummed with money and highly opinionated in matters (marriage) of which u know nothing about because you have yet to get married yourself. You complain to much and should have congratulated her no matter your feelings or opinions. That was selfish. And what do you even care that much for? It's her life not yours. Her sister ofcourse had every right to stand up for her. You should get your nose out of the air.

no one cares about the size of your family home, or what your sister in law wore when she got married. you sound like you have the maturity of a 15 year old, and i don't think "statistically" people with your level of maturity should be getting married at all, but who am i to judge!

Firstly, I didn't go to college and I run a very successful company (the majority of the ritchest people in the world are uneducated look that up) Second, her family probly only agree with you because they are too nice to tell you to shut up.

Who are you to decide when the appropriate time to get married is. It's up to the people who are getting married. NOT YOU.

I can't believe you think your opinion is worth concern. Just because you don't agree doesn't mean it's wrong. Also, you sound very ignorant, I don't know why you are going round bothering other people about their life choices.

If the marriage was a mistake I'm sure she will learn from it, and even then it's still none of your business. Why don't you grow up your self.

Remember people have the right to make their own decisions and should, no matter how old or mature, be given respect and support with their life decisions.

you shouldnt have told them directly as from ur story , i dont think she is a person who can take thinhs the right way. She will be jealous of u and her bro in the first place. So anything u tell them from now on will not be heard. On a positive note, i know you were actually concerned bout her. But u also need to keep some feelings to urself . Thats wayyy better than getting involved n getting hurt. i do not hate u . i understand ur plight very well. try talkin to them if they dont respond well. the answer is - IGNORE them forever!

Wow...you sound like a snob, I'd hate you too.

Your to into yourself in my opinion and I also agree with ollieo. Some people can't afford the luxuries Of going to college Like u can and they don't like to admit that fact! Instead of downing her encourage her and congradgulate her on her marriage. Getting married is a big deal and if that persons family doesn't support from the begginning then it's already off to a bad start. U only live once and a person shouldn't have to live up to everyones standards that's just stupid. I went to college for a bit I wanted to b a doctor, I got married young and I had a baby so I couldn't afford it anymore and I had to stop and I acceplted the fact that other things in life r more important like my kids they are my greatest accomplishment and my family make me feel rich and that's all that matters. I dint care what anyone else thinks.

they're giving her quite intelligent advice. she is arrogant and needs to have her air head deflated quite a bit. though i as a 19 year old agree with the sentiment that i am too young to marry there are some people my age wise beyond their years & no college education made them that way. blue collar teaches someone to grow up quickly where as the op is 25 and sounds like my younger sister. it's really quite pathetic.

Ollieo, I always agree with what you say. You seem like a wonderful person! Take heed, sweetie! Ollieo gives excellent advice.

"His step mother is 31,he is 23.His real father doesn't get along with him so he didn't attend and is 55." omg who cares!!!!! i hope this post is a parody of people who have a superiority complex, otherwise you are a very sad and ignorant person indeed.

I fully agree with the last conmentor! And if it is of any difference. I also am not a teenager, a female, married for 20 years (at the age of 21 by the way. While getting pregnant from the man I'm still married to today at the age of 19 after only knowing him for 2-3 months.) we have to beautiful children, and I also only have an AA and make well in the six figures along with my husband who does as well every year with only his AA. So people who are commenting on your post are mature adults who have also lived a little bit of life themselves. You should seriously reconsider your stuck way of thinking. There isn't a mold for life. It happens sll different ways, and yours is not the only way to the happy ending.

Also you want respect as an adult who is mature and educated, and you write "grow a brain tweenager"

What is with that. I am only being honest with you.

It's funny how you don't like people doubting your opinions yet you are quick to judge others.

You seen imature and a little ignorant. Seems you can't realy be to opposed to the other side if the family after all

u no people she asked for help not criticizm. 19 is too young to ge marrid. it might work out sometimes but save urself the heartache and get to no the guy first!!!!