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I am one of the most kind,caring,genuine,loving, honest people you could come across yet no one wants me.
No one fights to keep me.
No one has gotten infatuated with me, tried to pursue me or anything.
What's wrong with me then ?
Am I missing something
Yes, it sounds like you know what your strengths are, but are your weaknesses? The flip side of our virtues are our character defects. I'm not trying to put you down or discourage you, but nobody's perfect.
"No one fights to keep me." I'm sorry to say but perhaps you keep choosing the wrong people.
I would say that could depend if you are male or female. Usually a female will have a bunch of guys going coo coo for coco puffs. Guys are the ones that are get all goofy over a cute girl. The females aren't far the smarter ones that are not really willing to put up with the shot that guys are always ready to dish out. But now it could be your vibe or aura that you give off. Remember "Negativity breeds Negativity." If you think, feel, carry yourself in negative ffashion, then others will pick up on it and they will shy away from getting to close. They will think to themself " that person seems awful negative about life in general.
Normally the people that say that they are good lack the insight to see they aren't. Maybe you just lack initiative. Maybe you have your own head pushed far into your own ass. Or maybe you are unlucky.
If we are going to help you, we need more info. Firstly, do guys ever take initiative to talk to you? You must have tried online dating. Tell us more about that.
Yeah but tbh it's not all about dating.
I just wished a lot of people admired me, wanted to spend a lot of time with me, even become infatuated with me.
I have pretty much always been treated as second best especially to the few I have invested in.
It's not all about dating but the fact people just aren't crazy about me.
Even people who think negatively will eventually get someone who becomes obsessed with them.
Why doesn't it happen for me
I know the feeling. The feeling like you have it harder to connect. That you are always a side note. If you want to feel full just try to balance yourself. Pure goodness is bad, not a single person wants that. Search for an equilibrium. Make yourself mysterious. Bait the people into wanting to know more about you. For starters you could try to search people like you and try to develop some meaningful relationship. And don't make yourself obnoxious, there's no better way to fuck up a relationship.
okay so I need a bit of bad in me too ? Where should I start?
I could learn subtle manipulation perhaps?
Maybe I'm boring and need a "bad side" lightly
You should act with intelligence. I did that and I had like a couple of girlfriends. Hell, I even rejected girls that tried to go out with me. It's not going to work every time for everybody but try it. Respecting the bad side, a little of conviction and honour always are great. You need to capitalise romanticism in the relationships. You have to make yourself the object of some kind of desire and people have to feel like they need to follow you. It's not going to be easy but is doable.
Never apologize. IT's sign of weakness. Your friends don't need it, and your enemies won't believe it anyway.
May be its a little harsh but it's a fact you are all those things may be that's why no one approaches you either that or you just don't know it yet who likes or care for you
I have a feeling the “good” qualities you describe may make you clingy. Clingy people tend to be a turn-off to others.
I’m learning about dating myself, but what you describes seems to be more about making friends than dating.
Well I have showed interest in others with friends I have to admit I probably was clingy in the past. I only seemed that way Because I always felt second best.
I now don't try much with friends anymore tbh.
I was in love with this girl but I always threw myself at her like not literally but I was always there no matter what.
Probably looked like a walk over I guess .
When I take a step back in hope to get her attention it didn't really work so I would get angry and start trying to get her attention again which probably made me look clingy
Same here gurl, breaks me anytime 😔 its just sad how on valentine or woman day, girls atleast recieve a simple card or rose from someone but heyyyy, not me. Its been like this for 19 and i have no idea whats wrong with me. No one ever apologize to me first in an argument. When i tried to stay mad at someone by not talking to them... They behave like they have no idea i exsited in their lives. Luckily i did find some really decent friends in year 12. I hope the same goes for you. Find your people