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Every time I get mad I start talking to myself a lot at hyperspeed. I think about all of the things that make me mad. My brain starts to hurt from working too hard.
Why can't I just say "im not gonna think about it anymore" and be done with it? Why do I constantly think up ways to make myself angry and angry and angrier.
I remember reading a book about auras and the colors people see them in and all that stuff. They mentioned that anger was a certain color:
Think of it as starting with plain water and adding colorant to it. It's easy to add color but very difficult to take it out. To take the color out you mainly would have to add water and water until it was so diluted that the colorant's color becomes faded and almost indistinguishable.
According to that book's approach on the subject, anger would be a color that has a strong presence, and the more you get angry, the easier it is to get angry or harder not to if you prefer. The angrier you get, the more horrendous the outburst the more it affects your aura.
I dunno if I believe it all as it stands but I did take something from it. I worked on not getting angry as much as I can and I get less angry now then I did at one point. I found that letting the anger out by punching stuff or yelling didn't help because I simply needed to do it all the time.
I've still some water to add to my pond and the anger is more present at some times then others but I am doing better and working on it. They say it's not good to bottle things up but there are other avenues to take beside anger.
The trick is to try training yourself.
Yes there's the old-saying that the best way to think about a white elephant is to tell yourself to not think about a white elephant.
But in reality you can also really train yourself to change how you think.
If this is a serious issue, I'd suggest contacting a therapist.
However if you want free internet help... why not try a few things like...
- writing down what you are angry over and putting it in a box.
This way you acknowledge what you're thinking and feeling, but you can tell yourself "I made a note of it, I can get back to it later." so then you can go off and do something else.
and when you find yourself thinking of it again, stop and remind yourself that you promised to put it off.
Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress has it right. Most likely you can train yourself by thinking of something else when you are mad. I have had the issue most of my life, and since someone told me I could retrain myself (in my mid 40-s), I have gotten to the point of just being able to say: NO I WONT BE MAD! then thinking of what ever I can see.
Sometimes my brain won't shut down, especially when I'm anxious about something. I have been successful sometimes by focusing on something else but when I'm really worked up it's hard. It happens before bed or if I wake up in the night, but sometimes it happens randomly in the day and drives me mad!