I think that many parents now are unhappy with the discipline their parents gave them. They do not like that they had curfews or were forced to follow rules that they did not agree with so they think they are doing their kids a favor by being the "cool parents". I see a lot of compensation for what one lacked in their childhood in parents who have disrespectful kids that are not mentally challenged. That and what Joybird said. Great explanation.
As for me, I was disrespectful to my Mom because she beat me, let her friends disrespect me and let my father beat and sexually humiliate me as a child. While my sister and I were at home, scared for our lives and being mistreated by dear old Dad, she was out drinking and having fun with her friends. She'd come home and ask why my sister was passed out on the ground and why he was cleaning the carpet, why I was locked in my room with no sheets or furniture, huddled in a corner, begging God to kill me and he'd say "Because they were being disrespectful" and she'd just say "Ok I'm going to bed".
But when she heard about how other Mothers let their husbands/boyfriends do that to their kids, or the bad things that she did that other Mothers did to their kids (she liked to watch Dr. Phil, lol), she'd suddenly become an opinionated Christian "Oh how could anyone let their husband hurt their children like that! Some people just shouldn't have kids!". I didn't understand the notion that some people were just crazy as a kid, so I had a hard time showing her respect due to her behavior. I'm more respectful of her now, she has improved since Dad left (and learned that he's a lying prick). I didn't disrespect all adults, just her.
TL;DR the parents may look like they are great and awesome parents in public, which my parents did quite well (teachers tried to call Social Services on them but my parents were charmers), but I was also labeled as a "bad kid" as a child. If any of the adults in my life knew then what they do now, I guarantee that their opinions of me would have been a lot nicer.
Just giving you guys the flip side of the coin here.
That's been an awful childhood for you but I think it makes us better parents. My mother was also delusional and is rewriting history now!!
The only thing I say to my son about a curfew is that if he hasn't contacted me near that time to tell me where he is then I get really worried that something has happened to him. It's more for my comfort than to 'ground him' I just don't want him meeting local thugs on his way home from a friend's house. Although, he knows that I am always happy to pick him up - should it be 100 miles away, his safety is my priority.
Why are Teens and young people SO RUDE to thier parents (mother) ?
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I think that many parents now are unhappy with the discipline their parents gave them. They do not like that they had curfews or were forced to follow rules that they did not agree with so they think they are doing their kids a favor by being the "cool parents". I see a lot of compensation for what one lacked in their childhood in parents who have disrespectful kids that are not mentally challenged. That and what Joybird said. Great explanation.
As for me, I was disrespectful to my Mom because she beat me, let her friends disrespect me and let my father beat and sexually humiliate me as a child. While my sister and I were at home, scared for our lives and being mistreated by dear old Dad, she was out drinking and having fun with her friends. She'd come home and ask why my sister was passed out on the ground and why he was cleaning the carpet, why I was locked in my room with no sheets or furniture, huddled in a corner, begging God to kill me and he'd say "Because they were being disrespectful" and she'd just say "Ok I'm going to bed".
But when she heard about how other Mothers let their husbands/boyfriends do that to their kids, or the bad things that she did that other Mothers did to their kids (she liked to watch Dr. Phil, lol), she'd suddenly become an opinionated Christian "Oh how could anyone let their husband hurt their children like that! Some people just shouldn't have kids!". I didn't understand the notion that some people were just crazy as a kid, so I had a hard time showing her respect due to her behavior. I'm more respectful of her now, she has improved since Dad left (and learned that he's a lying prick). I didn't disrespect all adults, just her.
TL;DR the parents may look like they are great and awesome parents in public, which my parents did quite well (teachers tried to call Social Services on them but my parents were charmers), but I was also labeled as a "bad kid" as a child. If any of the adults in my life knew then what they do now, I guarantee that their opinions of me would have been a lot nicer.
Just giving you guys the flip side of the coin here.
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joybird
11 years ago
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That's been an awful childhood for you but I think it makes us better parents. My mother was also delusional and is rewriting history now!!
The only thing I say to my son about a curfew is that if he hasn't contacted me near that time to tell me where he is then I get really worried that something has happened to him. It's more for my comfort than to 'ground him' I just don't want him meeting local thugs on his way home from a friend's house. Although, he knows that I am always happy to pick him up - should it be 100 miles away, his safety is my priority.