Why am I never someone people want to be around?

Eventually you will "break". This is a good thing. After this, you won't care about other people any more, about having friends or being liked. You will come to admire your own qualities, which you may not have been aware of before you had your new introspective abilities. You will speak your mind, the rare times you speak. You will dress as you wish, giving no regard to people's stares. Everything about your life will be unconventional, because it will be you. As you grow older, you will become stranger and stranger. Maybe you will not even be human one day.