The fact that you have been on and off for about four years IS the problem. That is what should concern you if you want something more long term rather than who said I love you when. You need to figure out whether you really have a relationship, and you are right, she could just be waiting for someone better to come along and so could you. As you know just saying I love you doesn't make it true, although it's a good thing to say it when you feel it. Ignore those who don't believe in love, those people are happy without love, so that belief system works for them, but don't listen to them unless you want to try to become like them and build a life without love. Ignore the players as well or you will end up in a shallow relationship with no real intimacy, which is a lot less fun than a real relationship.
Are you happy together and do you enjoy each other? For each of the times you broke up, do you know why you broke up and are those reasons solved, as in if you're back together what's changed this time to bring you back together. If there are no substantial changes and you are just bouncing back and forth then either one or both of you consider the other just a last resort/backup, waiting for someone better to come along.
When is the word "Love" to be said?
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The fact that you have been on and off for about four years IS the problem. That is what should concern you if you want something more long term rather than who said I love you when. You need to figure out whether you really have a relationship, and you are right, she could just be waiting for someone better to come along and so could you. As you know just saying I love you doesn't make it true, although it's a good thing to say it when you feel it. Ignore those who don't believe in love, those people are happy without love, so that belief system works for them, but don't listen to them unless you want to try to become like them and build a life without love. Ignore the players as well or you will end up in a shallow relationship with no real intimacy, which is a lot less fun than a real relationship.
Are you happy together and do you enjoy each other? For each of the times you broke up, do you know why you broke up and are those reasons solved, as in if you're back together what's changed this time to bring you back together. If there are no substantial changes and you are just bouncing back and forth then either one or both of you consider the other just a last resort/backup, waiting for someone better to come along.