What to do when a so-called friend stops talking to you for no reason?

15 Comments

I moved school and I became friends with these other two girls that were also new. So friend A was really outgoing and fun to be with. Friend B was kind of obesessed with A, but didn't really pay much attention to me.

After 5 months, friend A had to move to another state. I was really sad, I felt like I was losing one of my best friends, even though I had only known her for five months, and I had all my best friends at my other school. So, anyway, I made her a lot of hand-made stuff for her to remember me, and I took the time to record people at school and make this really emotive video.

After she'd gone, I would write to her on facebook at least twice a week, telling everything that was happening at school. Friend B would say everyday she missed A, but told me she hadn't talked or written to her very often.

So one day I wrote something to A, like 5 paragraphs, and one week after she replied she would write to me as soon as possible. Another 10 days after, I saw she had posted a heart and a 'I miss you' in friend B's wall. I looked at mine hoping she had remembered me, but all I got was a poke. A POKE, after almost 3 weeks waiting for her.

What should I do?

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Comments ( 15 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • joybird
    11 years ago | pl

    She has moved on in her new life so you only need to drop her a few lines every so often to keep in touch. Don't worry about maintaining contact coz you'll probably never see her again. People will come and go in your life!

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago | pl

    I ate a sandwich while reading this :D

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  • abc1234
    11 years ago | pl

    move on. she's not worth your time.

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  • wigsplitz
    11 years ago | pl

    Nothin' wrong with a good poke once in a while.

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  • SoccerStud88
    11 years ago | pl

    it involves girls. I stopped reading after realizing that.

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  • tommy81
    11 years ago | pl

    Maybe "friend A" simply likes "friend B" more. I know that sucks, but that may be that way it is. If contact with you is minimal, but contact with "B" is regular - that kind of tells you something.

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    • Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress
      11 years ago | pl

      This.

      Yes it may hurt but sometimes that's part of life.

      Everyone goes through it.

      I remember once being bored and asking some friends if they wanted to hang out. They told me "we're full up," and then invited someone else - right in front of me.

      Yeah it hurt. Did I nag them about it? No. What would it prove? I never asked them again and found different people to be friends with.

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  • Stern_rules
    11 years ago | pl

    you care too much, you should really start trying 'not giving a fuck'. I doubt friend A wants to hear every fuckin detail of your week, give it a rest and let it die <:)

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago | pl

    I picked a nice booger out of my nose while reading this...

    Anyway, if she moved away to another state you most likely wont ever see her again, and whats the big deal anyway you only knew her for 5 months, nothing lasts forever, and like everything else in life, friendships come and go like the wind.

    I had similar experiences with people I knew years ago, around the end of HS where I had reached out and was either rebuffed or ignored entirely. I wouldnt even say it hurt, but it was certainly confusing, esp when nothing had caused the supposed rift, but thats life, no matter what happens it goes on.

    I wouldnt bother contacting her again, but if you dont hear from her in time I would write something sarcastic, short, and to the point, like

    "I guess it was nice knowing you".

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  • joeystyles
    11 years ago | pl

    so- called.....lol they just did you a favor!!

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  • rinki
    11 years ago | pl

    she'll soon realize how wrong she's been in ignoring u

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  • Angel_in_a_Glass_Dress
    11 years ago | pl

    Here's the problem.... You're snooping her FB to see who she talks to and you're making a big deal out of the fact that she's giving someone else more attention.

    In all honesty it's not your business what she says to "B".

    If she says she'll write you and then gives someone else more attention... that's her business. Yes it hurts but... she's not obliged to be your friend.

    I'd say stop nagging her. If you keep trying and she gives you less back each time ... it's likely she's tired of it.

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  • [Old Memory]
    11 years ago | pl

    move on

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  • dom180
    11 years ago | pl

    Pretend nothing happened and start writing again. A probably wants to talk to you again, but thinks it might be too awkward. A is happier talking to B because A and B have known eachother for longer. By taking the initiative and rekindling yourself, you are taking the awkwardness that A might be feeling out of the equation. If you only poke back, you are showing the you too are indecisive.

    You being really nice might have made it more awkward, A might feel awkward talking to you again. As a more general point, stop comparing and competing with B as well, friendship isn't a competition.

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