What's your biggest regret in life?

I don't know tbh. There're so many things I've done that I'd like to undo. So many people whom I did wrong, whom I hurt. Some of these things haunt me in my dreams letting my inner conflicts thrive again and again. An inner war that burns on beautiful blooming hills, that's splatters blood on all those flowers and scares the fauna way. And when I wake up I might feel dead inside. Broken. All on my own again.

I tried my best to improve. I still do. I work as hard as possible. I take time to care for my health more and stop doing stupid and unhealthy stuff. I found friends that I'd support and that become more and more dear to my heart, online and outside my door. I'd allow feelings, all those feelings that I kept locked up, because they baulked the cold-hearted asshole that I'd be called and feed the fear of becoming weak and vulnerable. The feelings, my friends, my success would build great beautiful cities in my heart. I never felt so alive.

But still, there's fear and my deserted wreckages inside, underneath these cities, that threaten to collapse what all these wonderful people built.

I deeply regret my wrong doings and the wounds I inflicted on people both physical and mental.
And I fear that I'll never be able to live freely anymore.

All I can do now is apologise to everyone on earth that I've done wrong and hope.

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Comments ( 1 )
  • 1WeirdGuy

    Telling someone to kill themself who later killed themself

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