There's no shame in moving on quietly. Some people seem to think that if they stick at it long enough eventually they'll gain approval, but it doesn't usually work like that. I've seen it time and time again, here and other places online. They are desperate for approval and it shows. Then they suddenly change their act, pretending they don't even care in the hope that they seem "cool".
Sometimes they fade away and come back a week later, hoping nobody remembers them so they can start afresh. That never works - if you weren't liked the first time you won't be liked the second time, or the third time or the forth or fifth. It isn't a game of luck that you will eventually win if you keep trying.
If you don't make friends organically you usually won't by forcing it, and if you somehow do succeed it won't make you happy because the good thing about friendship is feeling validated after sharing yourself with other people and you can't have that feeling if you're not sharing your "true self" with them.
Some people feel angry at the people who won't befriend them and believe that by staying somewhere where they're not wanted they are making the other people unhappy just by existing and thus getting back at them, like an ugly piece of furniture. Not only is that a childish and passive-aggressive route, it also isn't even true and never works. People won't suddenly leave a community just because of one person they don't like much; you can't "win". Trolling also doesn't work - believe me when I say it won't annoy people, it will just reflect badly on you. Trolls are always more obvious than they think they are.
It's like working on a farm. You sow your seeds of friendliness and in time you grow your friendships. In some places the soil is barren and you won't be able to grow any friends no matter what kind of crops you plant. Haphazardly throwing more seeds at the soil won't make it suddenly decide to co-operate with you and start growing some friends, and neither will coming back wearing a disguise to trick the soil. You've just got to move on, find a new patch of soil and try there. That was a bad analogy, but whatever :P
What do you do if your internet friends don't like you?
← View full post
There's no shame in moving on quietly. Some people seem to think that if they stick at it long enough eventually they'll gain approval, but it doesn't usually work like that. I've seen it time and time again, here and other places online. They are desperate for approval and it shows. Then they suddenly change their act, pretending they don't even care in the hope that they seem "cool".
Sometimes they fade away and come back a week later, hoping nobody remembers them so they can start afresh. That never works - if you weren't liked the first time you won't be liked the second time, or the third time or the forth or fifth. It isn't a game of luck that you will eventually win if you keep trying.
If you don't make friends organically you usually won't by forcing it, and if you somehow do succeed it won't make you happy because the good thing about friendship is feeling validated after sharing yourself with other people and you can't have that feeling if you're not sharing your "true self" with them.
Some people feel angry at the people who won't befriend them and believe that by staying somewhere where they're not wanted they are making the other people unhappy just by existing and thus getting back at them, like an ugly piece of furniture. Not only is that a childish and passive-aggressive route, it also isn't even true and never works. People won't suddenly leave a community just because of one person they don't like much; you can't "win". Trolling also doesn't work - believe me when I say it won't annoy people, it will just reflect badly on you. Trolls are always more obvious than they think they are.
It's like working on a farm. You sow your seeds of friendliness and in time you grow your friendships. In some places the soil is barren and you won't be able to grow any friends no matter what kind of crops you plant. Haphazardly throwing more seeds at the soil won't make it suddenly decide to co-operate with you and start growing some friends, and neither will coming back wearing a disguise to trick the soil. You've just got to move on, find a new patch of soil and try there. That was a bad analogy, but whatever :P
--
[Old Memory]
10 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
4
4
That's a fucking fantastic answer, dom180! :D
--
dom180
10 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
0
0
Thank you! :3