With the exception of abuse, don't have a litmus test for what is or is not a good or acceptable relationship. I see people breaking up because somebody snooped at a phone or flirted with an ex. I see people, women especially, leaving happy situations with people they love because their friends cried "double standard" or "you deserve better." No, you end a relationship because of abuse, humiliation, danger, or good old fashioned unhappiness. Not the other fuss. It all comes and goes. Above all else if you want, on a gut level, to save a relationship, you go ahead and do it - not because you should or because of who's watching, but because you love your guy or girl and you're happy.
"I see people breaking up because somebody snooped at a phone or flirted with an ex. I see people, women especially, leaving happy situations with people they love because their friends cried "double standard" or "you deserve better."
At least those are SOME kind of reason, no matter how petty.
What about when things are going great for about two weeks and then the woman just decides, out of nowhere, to end it for NO apparent reason?
The "no apparent reason" in question is usually that her attraction to him has collapsed. This happens for a variety of reasons, and women are less likely to fully understand them than men are, simply because the things men most value in women are easy to see. What a woman values in a man is an interlocking pattern of factors that are often invisible to everyone else around them.
Is that why a lot of sexy and/or sophisticated women date dirt bags?
I used to live in this neighborhood and the manager of it was some blonde who had a "sexy, sophisticated secretary" look. High class looking, probably early 30's, whatever.
One day she mentioned having a lunch date with her husband. I was imagining James Bond in his Sunday best showing up in a black sports car. But no. it was some tall, scraggly, scruffy dorky looking biker type.
Like, why?
I watched guys do this to females as well. This confuses me as well. I feel like if you break up you should at least give your partner a legitimate reason.
What are keys to healthy relationship
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With the exception of abuse, don't have a litmus test for what is or is not a good or acceptable relationship. I see people breaking up because somebody snooped at a phone or flirted with an ex. I see people, women especially, leaving happy situations with people they love because their friends cried "double standard" or "you deserve better." No, you end a relationship because of abuse, humiliation, danger, or good old fashioned unhappiness. Not the other fuss. It all comes and goes. Above all else if you want, on a gut level, to save a relationship, you go ahead and do it - not because you should or because of who's watching, but because you love your guy or girl and you're happy.
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leggs91200
4 years ago
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"I see people breaking up because somebody snooped at a phone or flirted with an ex. I see people, women especially, leaving happy situations with people they love because their friends cried "double standard" or "you deserve better."
At least those are SOME kind of reason, no matter how petty.
What about when things are going great for about two weeks and then the woman just decides, out of nowhere, to end it for NO apparent reason?
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einexile
4 years ago
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NoLifer
4 years ago
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The "no apparent reason" in question is usually that her attraction to him has collapsed. This happens for a variety of reasons, and women are less likely to fully understand them than men are, simply because the things men most value in women are easy to see. What a woman values in a man is an interlocking pattern of factors that are often invisible to everyone else around them.
--
leggs91200
4 years ago
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Is that why a lot of sexy and/or sophisticated women date dirt bags?
I used to live in this neighborhood and the manager of it was some blonde who had a "sexy, sophisticated secretary" look. High class looking, probably early 30's, whatever.
One day she mentioned having a lunch date with her husband. I was imagining James Bond in his Sunday best showing up in a black sports car. But no. it was some tall, scraggly, scruffy dorky looking biker type.
Like, why?
I watched guys do this to females as well. This confuses me as well. I feel like if you break up you should at least give your partner a legitimate reason.