Unsure of my gender, please help also looking for cross-dressing advice

I'm looking for a gender label that fits me, and I also need advice on how to approach cross-dressing.

I am biologically female, but I want to be a guy and/or androgynous. I have a crazy urge to cross-dress, and recently bought some clothes that are meant for girls but look like male clothes. I cut my hair short like a boy's earlier this year. I have the guy clothes, a rather androgynous face, and short hair, but when I have to go out in public, I lose my nerve and dress in my girl clothes. I haven't come out to my parents yet, and I think that's part of the problem. Later this year, I have a formal school event to attend and originally planned to wear a suit, but was informed that girls have to wear dresses and boys must wear suits. How should I approach my problems?

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Comments ( 58 )
  • Murun

    You don't need a label. Just get on with whatever you're getting on with.

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  • llamalover

    no one cares when a girl dresses like a boy. I know because I have all my life, no, not because I thought I was a boy, just because they were comfier.
    So do what ever you want, just be glad you're not a boy that feels like a girl.

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    • chataholic

      llamalover, I congratulate you on your reply, you said it all, especially the last part.

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    • Thanks!

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  • BlackCatsAreAwesome

    I wonder if I'm an Apache attack helicopter or a Eurocopter 145 T2.

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    • Please don't comment unrelated stuff it's not nice or helpful.

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      • BlackCatsAreAwesome

        It's totally on topic. You need to get metaphors to understand the stupidity though.

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        • I get the reference and all, but it's not helpful, so there is no need to post it here.

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          • Kevinevan

            It actually is helpful because they are pointing out how stupidly you're acting worrying about this nonsense. Just be who you are.

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    • CreamPuffs

      Don't be an ass.

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      • Zorak

        McPUFFEers.

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        • CreamPuffs

          :)

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  • Nastynate

    Call yourself a "chick who wants a prick"

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    • haha

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  • 4Guardians

    Do a hormone test or whatever it's called. Some women have a natural high amount of testosterone, meaning that they're essentially men trapped in a woman's body. The opposite exists for man with estrogen.

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    • Thank you for the advice!

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      • 4Guardians

        You're welcome.

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  • Namez4321

    Ok look, if you want to be a guy then be a guy. You have to chose there's not really any inbetween at all. Trust me when I say that I'm not trying to be mean or offend you in any way, but there are only two genders and if you want to be a man then go trans gender but if you have the body of a woman then that's what you are CURRENTLY.

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  • anon_question

    This is awkward.

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    • How so?

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  • nikkiclaire

    Ugh ffs if liberals told you it was ok to be a different animal you'd worry about what animal you were called.

    Get over this bullshit gender crap already.

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    • babyblue_

      stfu

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      • nikkiclaire

        If you are OP I gotta point out that you changed the entire contents of your question.

        Your original post was not about a school event but ridiculous names you wanna be called for your gender.

        That is what I responded too.

        Nice slight of hand.

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        • Uh... What?

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          • nikkiclaire

            Your initial post was about what to call yourself and you changed it. Dont act stupid

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        • Zorak

          benedict arnold

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          • nikkiclaire

            Tf does that mean. Traitor to who? Is that a comment on the fact that I'm bisexual??

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    • Hey, that's unkind and not helpful. If you're going to bitch about people's opinions and identities, at least don't do it to their faces.

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      • nikkiclaire

        Well an anonymous poster on the internet is not exactly a face however, you posted not on an advice/support site but IS IT Normal. Expect opinions.

        My answer is helpful if you listen to what I'm saying which is get over the gender bullshit. It obviously has you worried enough to pose the question to strangers on the internet.

        That crap isn't helpful to anyone. Labels are bullshit.

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  • Phyliss

    I'm sorry for you for the wise cracks that some of the above have said. There is a blurring of genders but I don't believe at all that they are discretionary. If you naturally feel that you are gravitating toward a male identity it will be a lot easier for you than a male who is aiming to be female. The clothing industry has taken gender neutral or gender variant clothing to a new level so you should be able to find a way to gradually move up as well. Have you noticed that some very well known women's clothing designers are using both female and male models? I assume this is to show that some styles today can be worn by either gender. Some women's clothes have a masculine influence while some male designs are female influenced such as one company has a line of skirts for males. Gender variant acceptance is growing and this should be of benefit to you.

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  • hj7654

    Either figure a way to grow a dick, or just stick with what you brought to the track, and "identify" female. Thats what you are. There are only two genders. Male(Penis), and Female(Vagina)
    This whole gender dysphoria fad thats sweeping the world is enough to make me fucking crazy.

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  • DefinetlyNotJim

    You aren't going to change gender, you will be female your entire life.

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  • JuiceHarp

    I would call you whatever you want, if you like guys that is.

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  • 1986

    We have only one life in this word so come on be yourself!IF your parents will be not ok with your life, thats their problem. If they really love you they will be love you always:-)

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    • Thank you!

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  • PinkPiggy

    You should pretend you want be a punk or attach yourself to some type of skater or music scene or sport and then you can dress as a boy and your parents won't care. Get a fake gay boyfreind who looks straight who will play along with you and then you don't have to worry about your parents thinking that your gay.

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    • Cool, thank you!

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  • GenderConfused

    Do what makes you feel good. And wear whatever you want to the ball. Nobody can stop you. You have human rights.
    If your parents are approachable then i suggest you speak to them. Maybe you will be lucky and gain some much needed support.
    Good luck girl. Oops! I mean boy. Boy! Boy! Boy!

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    • Thanks! :D

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  • babyblue_

    do what makes you happy.

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    • Awesome advice! :D

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  • NashamaTheWeird

    Sounds like you are non binary. Just experiment and do whatever makes you happy.

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    • Thank you!

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      • NashamaTheWeird

        Your welcome!

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  • mia500

    Some people are genderless or gender non binary!

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    • I know that I'm nonbinary, but there are labels such as bigender and pangender to further specify gender. I'd like to find a label like that for myself, but I can't find one that fits.

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      • Murun

        I don't use a gender label on myself.. Why do you need to?

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        • I just feel the need to label myself... :( I should probably take the tip from you and not label myself...

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      • mia500

        It's also fine to self identify. Like they said, you don't need a label its a societal construct

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        • Hmm alright, thank you!

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  • CreamPuffs

    Just dress however makes you comfortable and don't worry about it.

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    • Zorak

      I have a friend that is Female to male transitioning and it is very weird watching it unfold.

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  • Alicia-White

    I'm Alicia, but I was formerly known as Barry. I have faced many harsh criticism on how I was in my younger years. Thank god it's 2017 and that the world is changing on a different view of the LGBTQ community. Who gives a flying fuck of what other people think about you. No matter how many water bottles I shove up in my neighbour's anus. I am still me. I am still Barry White. You do you boo.xx

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    • amyarmy

      Thank you!

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  • If none of the "labels" that you know of fit you, then don't label yourself. :)

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    • Sounds like sound advice, thank you!

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