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I hate my mom more than anyone else.she had never been loving towards me.I wish either of us were die. I really hate her.I feel like no one cares about me.no one is on my side.I always wish I would have died along with my dad.what to do to be free from these thoughts?
Clearly, you're finding life difficult right now.
You don't say how old you are, but the feelings you describe are not uncommon when going through adolescence, particularly if one parent has been lost due to divorce or death.
Unfortunately, you're not going to get the help you need here.
You say you feel nobody cares about you, but is there an adult you trust who you can talk to about your feelings? If you're still in school, is there a counselor?
If you're in the USA and you are a young person, have a look at these websites: https://teenlineonline.org/ http://oregonyouthline.org/
There may be similar services local to you.