To feel unknown and remain distant

is it normal to feel so different and alone from the rest of the world. as if a part of you is living, but not quite fully alive inside i mean, just to set the records straight, in case your wondering i live an average american life (or so we call it),i dont take any drugs, alcohol or medications im just the "typical teenage girl" thats what some may see me as, but i stand nowhere close to thire judgement. ive never been gothic or suicidal, or anything like that, although i have faced a massive amount of unforgetable, unfortunate tragics in my life especially for my age, which is pretty young! i come from a catholic christian backround but find it hard to keep a steady relationship with religion. i dont curse like many teenagers my age unless im rageing mad. as for grades and schoolwork, i am an average c student with basicly no friends im very quiet and try to focus on schoolwork. i guess thats where many people mistake me for anti-social or dull. Even when people do try to socialise with me i have so much to say but when its time to talk i dont know where to begin. i cant think of anything to say exept to complament on thire shoes, or comment on the weather. i guess you can say i dont have really good comunication skills. but as for writing thats a compleatly different story. as you can clerly see, i love to write and hope on becomeing a journalist in the future but i get discouraged evry so often and belive the future is something i will never get to because i wont make it, and that i'll never make it out of what ive came from. this sounds complicated but its prety simple if you look at socity. people always say that "all this rain will one day create a buetiful rose" i sure hope its true because it would defenitly be a shame if all this hard work dont pay off in the end. anyway, i belive its because were all diferent, and thats what makes us normal, otherwise this site wouldent have so many members. am i right?
sorry about the length of my story, i dident plan for it becoming this long guess it just comes to show the future is unexspected thanks for takeing your time and reading this who ever did, any comments will be gladly accepted, well aprecated. be honest and speak your mind, the truth will not offend me, unless its a lie. (sorry about the missed spelt words im not good in grammer)