Mother knows, I can assure you. All you would get is denial and, thus, create tension between the two of you. She may need you some day, especially
If she wakes up and comes to terms with it.
My guess: your thinking was probably one of eventual defeat by your dad. That is, you knew on some level that he would do this sooner or later, so why not go ahead and succumb in advance?
Sadly, if the females are of age and consent to these acts, no laws (to my knowledge) are being broken, which probably makes you feel even more powerless to this lewd and destructive behavior.
DO NOT JUSTIFY the continuation of this behavior. He may be ill, but HE us responsible for working with and getting it under control.
ONE way to set this straight. Confront the situation (probably at a time after he has been on a more-than-usual binge). This would be the time, if any, that he is having thoughts of guilt or remorse. In other words, a sobering up period. If he's ever going to listen, it would be during this time period.
Sit down with your mom and dad together. Present the facts. Don't nag him and don't speak specifically to either one. Address the situation. You can specifically refer to that. Speak in third person terms. For example "the situation concerning dad's addiction is effecting us all" (just an example )Leave feelings and emotion aside and state the facts. Then set your boundaries. An ultimatum is fine, but don't present as a threat. Assure them that you are faced with a difficult decision, and put the ball OUT of your court. "if the situation is not addressed, it leaves me with no choice."
And stick to your guns
BEFORE YOU DO THIS, THINK IT THROUGH. Make sure that you are ready to walk if you say that you are going to. And know that confronting the situation, should it open any eyes, can bring forth divorce or many unknown events. Just make sure you can live with the outcome , whatever that may be.
And whatever happens, it is not your fault. Again. NOT YOUR FAULT. Your simply bringing it to the table and addressing it. What happens from there is a result of his current and past decisions.
The issue of having a sex addicted father
← View full post
Mother knows, I can assure you. All you would get is denial and, thus, create tension between the two of you. She may need you some day, especially
If she wakes up and comes to terms with it.
My guess: your thinking was probably one of eventual defeat by your dad. That is, you knew on some level that he would do this sooner or later, so why not go ahead and succumb in advance?
Sadly, if the females are of age and consent to these acts, no laws (to my knowledge) are being broken, which probably makes you feel even more powerless to this lewd and destructive behavior.
DO NOT JUSTIFY the continuation of this behavior. He may be ill, but HE us responsible for working with and getting it under control.
ONE way to set this straight. Confront the situation (probably at a time after he has been on a more-than-usual binge). This would be the time, if any, that he is having thoughts of guilt or remorse. In other words, a sobering up period. If he's ever going to listen, it would be during this time period.
Sit down with your mom and dad together. Present the facts. Don't nag him and don't speak specifically to either one. Address the situation. You can specifically refer to that. Speak in third person terms. For example "the situation concerning dad's addiction is effecting us all" (just an example )Leave feelings and emotion aside and state the facts. Then set your boundaries. An ultimatum is fine, but don't present as a threat. Assure them that you are faced with a difficult decision, and put the ball OUT of your court. "if the situation is not addressed, it leaves me with no choice."
And stick to your guns
BEFORE YOU DO THIS, THINK IT THROUGH. Make sure that you are ready to walk if you say that you are going to. And know that confronting the situation, should it open any eyes, can bring forth divorce or many unknown events. Just make sure you can live with the outcome , whatever that may be.
And whatever happens, it is not your fault. Again. NOT YOUR FAULT. Your simply bringing it to the table and addressing it. What happens from there is a result of his current and past decisions.
Best to you, friend