It sounds like you could be depressed as a result of a solitary lifestyle, I sort of went through this phase in highschool but I started seeing a therapist and switched from narcotics to real medication, it helped. Not to say this is for you, just usually drugs like pot just complicate peoples lives by making it more difficult to function, if you're really this anxious about people and have no friends to talk to you should really see somebody in way of therapy to work out these problems with, just try to remember that you won't feel this way forever, I mean it's just impossible. Suicide is not a way out, dead is never better. Ok maybe if you were in a concentration camp or something but this "prison" as you say it only exists in your mind, "The mind is its own place, and can make a heaven out of hell and hell out of heaven". Everyone can recover from these feelings, the thing is you need to really try, and once you remember how good life really feels you'll want more of it and make a real effort to get out of your shell, regardless of whether you might "say something stupid".
Spooky, withdrawn, creeper: Friendless.
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It sounds like you could be depressed as a result of a solitary lifestyle, I sort of went through this phase in highschool but I started seeing a therapist and switched from narcotics to real medication, it helped. Not to say this is for you, just usually drugs like pot just complicate peoples lives by making it more difficult to function, if you're really this anxious about people and have no friends to talk to you should really see somebody in way of therapy to work out these problems with, just try to remember that you won't feel this way forever, I mean it's just impossible. Suicide is not a way out, dead is never better. Ok maybe if you were in a concentration camp or something but this "prison" as you say it only exists in your mind, "The mind is its own place, and can make a heaven out of hell and hell out of heaven". Everyone can recover from these feelings, the thing is you need to really try, and once you remember how good life really feels you'll want more of it and make a real effort to get out of your shell, regardless of whether you might "say something stupid".