Hi working mom. Your son does have a foot fetish. He reminds me of when I was young.You should probably get a babysitter that will let him smell her nylon feet.Otherwise he will get into trouble at school smelling girls feet or something like that.Therapy does not work. believe me I tried it.The more you tell him not to do it, the more he will do it.SORRY!!
Hi amazingguy,
Thanks for your perspective. Not by choice, but for a month I did have a coworker babysit who let him enjoy sniffing her nylon feet all the time. I have since ended this arrangement (see above on this thread for the details).
From your perspective, you think this actually helped him or are you just saying from a fetish perspective this is what he wants? What if all of my coworkers had let him sniff their feet without question? Assuming your serious, I think this would create more problems, not less.
After thinking and dealing with this for a long time now, I think it definitely is a fetish (I'd say partialism/preference). There is a careful balance between repressing his desires (bad) and learning boundaries / how to express them.
I've since stopped working at the place and got an office job. I removed pantyhose from my wardrobe - I feel bad about this but I don't know another way. I don't want him fantasizing or channeling that sexual preference toward his mother.
I have thought about doing the unthinkable though - telling female friends about his preference, teaching him to ask nicely if he can rub their feet, and if they let him, to sniff them later. This will teach him healthy boundaries.
What is not a healthy boundary and I still need advice on - is this is a sexual desire showing young. And he is obviously getting aroused. So, at his age, the problem with this plan is it would be exposing him to adult intimate contact (sniffing feet) at a young age. My struggle, is.. the cat is already out of the bag. Yet... if he got caught sniffing one of my friend's panties when they stayed the night, it doesn't mean i would teach him to ask them nicely and if they said yes, go ahead. THAT is clearly inappropriate... which makes the whole thing just confusing and odd - a foot massage isn't inappropriate.. sniffing feet borders on it.
I'm just trying to be a compassionate mom who sets boundaries and raises him to enjoy a healthy sexuality later - not repressed, not uncontrolled, just balanced. Repressed would be : no woman with pantyhose around him ever again, shoes always on, no massages, no sniffing. Uncontrolled would be : hiring a babysitter to let him sniff her nylon feet all the time, or letting him steal my pantyhose, etc. What balanced would be is somewhere in between. Still seeking.
Son keeps smelling my coworkers feet IIN?
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amazingguy
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Hi working mom. Your son does have a foot fetish. He reminds me of when I was young.You should probably get a babysitter that will let him smell her nylon feet.Otherwise he will get into trouble at school smelling girls feet or something like that.Therapy does not work. believe me I tried it.The more you tell him not to do it, the more he will do it.SORRY!!
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workingmom
7 years ago
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Hi amazingguy,
Thanks for your perspective. Not by choice, but for a month I did have a coworker babysit who let him enjoy sniffing her nylon feet all the time. I have since ended this arrangement (see above on this thread for the details).
From your perspective, you think this actually helped him or are you just saying from a fetish perspective this is what he wants? What if all of my coworkers had let him sniff their feet without question? Assuming your serious, I think this would create more problems, not less.
After thinking and dealing with this for a long time now, I think it definitely is a fetish (I'd say partialism/preference). There is a careful balance between repressing his desires (bad) and learning boundaries / how to express them.
I've since stopped working at the place and got an office job. I removed pantyhose from my wardrobe - I feel bad about this but I don't know another way. I don't want him fantasizing or channeling that sexual preference toward his mother.
I have thought about doing the unthinkable though - telling female friends about his preference, teaching him to ask nicely if he can rub their feet, and if they let him, to sniff them later. This will teach him healthy boundaries.
What is not a healthy boundary and I still need advice on - is this is a sexual desire showing young. And he is obviously getting aroused. So, at his age, the problem with this plan is it would be exposing him to adult intimate contact (sniffing feet) at a young age. My struggle, is.. the cat is already out of the bag. Yet... if he got caught sniffing one of my friend's panties when they stayed the night, it doesn't mean i would teach him to ask them nicely and if they said yes, go ahead. THAT is clearly inappropriate... which makes the whole thing just confusing and odd - a foot massage isn't inappropriate.. sniffing feet borders on it.
I'm just trying to be a compassionate mom who sets boundaries and raises him to enjoy a healthy sexuality later - not repressed, not uncontrolled, just balanced. Repressed would be : no woman with pantyhose around him ever again, shoes always on, no massages, no sniffing. Uncontrolled would be : hiring a babysitter to let him sniff her nylon feet all the time, or letting him steal my pantyhose, etc. What balanced would be is somewhere in between. Still seeking.
Any advice appreciated!