Someone told me that i’ma “disgrace to the lgbtq community”?

24 Comments

Cause I thought this person was a friend whom I trusted and supported and I’ve known this person for a couple of months now, and I told him how proud of being all three Pan/BI/Dem orientations and what have ya but now he starts a fight with me this morning in which I didn’t want to be apart of saying that I was “fake” person and that a live a lie of being Pansexual, Bi and Dem of course and that I’m a total disgrace to the LGBTQ community and that I don’t even belong here in the LGBTQ. cause the live that I’m living is a fucking lie and he also called me some truly awful names etc.. I won’t go into details but let’s leave it at that for now... and what he told me really hurted my feelings like it’s not even funny. cause I’m a proud and dedicated member and activist at that and proud of what I truly stand for as a human being and individual. Words cannot describe the hurt and pain I feel when he said that I just couldn’t fucking believe it cause I’ve been called many names and got my feelings hurt many times my others too but never I have I ever been called a “Disgrace to a LGBTQ community group” before in my entire life. 😢😢😢

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  • SkullsNRoses
    2 years ago | pl

    I will never understand how some people in the LGBT+ community complain about being mocked and excluded by cisgender heterosexuals only to then turn on members of their own community and mock and exclude them on the grounds that they don’t score as many points in some imaginary oppression olympics.

    If you’re not a cisgender heterosexual you are LGBT+, it’s not a choice and it’s not up for debate. Identifying as bi/pan/demisexual makes perfect sense to anyone who actually understands sexuality and your biphobic/acephobic “friend” had no right to call you such horrible things.

    He certainly has a lot of growing up to do and I would not take him back as a friend without a sincere apology and him addressing his issues with bi, pan and demisexual people and those who identify with multiple labels.

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  • [Old Memory]
    2 years ago | pl

    The sad thing is that some LGBT people feel like their sexual orientation is all they have when that isn't true. They are humans just like everyone else.

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    • LloydAsher
      2 years ago | pl

      One of the only non religious reasons people dislike the lgbt community is because they tend to want stupid shit. I got nothing against gays but destroying the notion of biological sex is such a stupid proposal, people arent that dumb. Since the lgbt movement doesnt have an alternative name the non supportive lgbt of the lgbt community are caught in the crossfire.

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  • 1WeirdGuy
    2 years ago | pl

    Choose your friends wisely. Ive had shitty friends too. He says you are fake because you are not the labels you claim you are? At the end of the day you are arguing about labels. Whether youre pan or binary doesnt really matter its just a word. Yall should just live your life try to be happy and not worry about these things. Just go do what you wanna do but the labels drama is silly. It sounds like a dungeons and dragons argument

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  • litelander8
    2 years ago | pl

    The LGBTQ community is a disgrace to the LGBTQ community.

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    • LloydAsher
      2 years ago | pl

      This is why groups need to be labeled in a non vague way.

      Saw a black stripe on the new pride flag. So is black people just another orientation or what? Theres a race element to LGBTQ+? Its terrible branding.

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  • Tommythecaty
    2 years ago | pl

    Being called a disgrace by ANY person with a group think mentality is a compliment.

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  • Lusty-Argonian
    2 years ago | pl

    Honestly I avoid anyone who broadcasts they are LGBT. They are usually cancerous

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    • Cuntsiclestick
      2 years ago | pl

      I noticed the ones that make being LGBT+ their entire personality are boring as fuck. It's like they have no hobbies, no individuality, and just have nothing to show for their lives.

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      • Lusty-Argonian
        2 years ago | pl

        You are definitely right about that. I'll never understand those people. I wonder how they find happiness

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        • LloydAsher
          2 years ago | pl

          They dont. Suicide rates are up for that particular community. While I'm sure public acceptance is an issue FORCING acceptance will not work in the slightest and cause people to hate even more.

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  • Tinybird
    2 years ago | pl

    Who cares if you're a disgrace to some dumb community or group? Be your OWN person.

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    • LloydAsher
      2 years ago | pl

      Exactly. You are an individual first and then you can choose to be in association with groups. If you are gay it's not like you automatically become apart of the lgbt+ collective.

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  • [Old Memory]
    2 years ago | pl

    Just a shitty friend. Sounds like he has a lot of issues to just start a fight out of nowhere like that.
    Your friend cant decide wether you belong in the lgbtq+ community or not. You decide that as you know what your sexuality is the best yourself.

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  • Cuntsiclestick
    2 years ago | pl

    For the most part the people I consider a disgrace to the LGBT+ community are the ones who hate on straight people, the opposite gender, bisexuals, and other types of people. I remember being on dating sites trying to date women and some of them were bitter, angry individuals filled with hate and I just didn't want to deal with that bullshit. It was one of the reasons I distanced myself from the community.

    Your friend is the disgrace, not you.

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    • SkullsNRoses
      2 years ago | pl

      Good point, the real disgrace to the LGBT+ community in this post is this ignorant bully of a “friend” (assuming he’s LGBT+, which seems to be implied.)

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    • LloydAsher
      2 years ago | pl

      To be fair the T part of LGBTQ is what is causing some discontent. The LGBQ are close enough in goal to not cause that much infighting.

      The T part wants to bring on the bulk of the overreaching legislation. Which is causing the LGBTQ community to be fractured and infighting to be a problem.

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  • Boojum
    2 years ago | pl

    I'm a boring old, white, straight guy, and so I usually refrain from sticking my oar in on such discussions since I realise I know fuck-all about the politics.

    However, I just have to say that I would have found it exceedingly bizarre (and hilarious) if anyone had ever told me that I was a disgrace to the straight community. I mean, what the fuck does that even mean?

    If every sexual orientation had an official rulebook that came with the official pride banner in the Welcome To The Community induction package, then I guess it would be possible to be a disgrace to the club. As far as I know, that's not how it actually works. But like I say, what the fuck do I know?

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  • RoseIsabella
    2 years ago | pl

    This is all so vague. In what way are you a disgrace to your so called community? Can you please be more specific?

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  • DADNSCAL
    2 years ago | pl

    Don’t let others’ judgment of you affect your self image. That person is probably projecting his own inadequacies on you.

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  • RoyyRogers
    2 years ago | pl

    You can be panromantic/Demisexual at the same time. Since Asexual spectrum is interest or lack of in sex.

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