Social rejection

82% Normal
9 Comments

Ok so here it is, my "problem". To be honest I personally don't really think there is any short term solution to this, but some advice from someone (anyone) would be more than welcome. Basically I've been feeling left out by my friends for a very long time (over a year) and on top of that I broke up with my girlfriend back in April. I just can't seem to get over her. She's been dating an old friend of mine for a while now and it just kills me to see them together. But we all pretty much have the same friends (the same group that's rejecting me) so I often have to face the situation anyhow. All of them are just turning their backs at me or showing very low interest in me. I constantly worry that i'll have nothing to do in my free time and this situation is slowly becoming all I can think about. What can I do to get back on track again? Is it normal that I feel like i've become a very boring person? Feel free to ask me for some details. Thanks!

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Comments ( 9 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • soccer2
    13 years ago | pl

    Ok when did they start acting like this? After u broke up with her? Because if it happened then, then Maybe it's because they feel weird cause u r not with her. Also maybe because u think about it and r consumed by it this inhibits u. If u think too much about somethingu will start to believe it and therefore it changes ur attitude and makes u become socially inept. Hang out with them. Forget the problem and have some fun. U need to get it mind off it. As for the ex, she has a bf and has probably moved on and u should do the same. Even though it's hard, try not to think how sad u r to see them together. Go on a date or something. Good luck

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    • AlixPerez
      13 years ago | pl

      They didn't start acting like that after the gf thing. It started much earlier than that. So i'm sure she doesn't have a lot to do with it. The only influence she had was that she blew my self esteem away. All of it.

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      • Uzzie101
        12 years ago | pl

        I recommend new friends. Try meeting new people. I know, that sounds near impossible, but I'm sure you'll hit it off with someone. Especially if you work or are still at school, you'll find another clique. If these people ignore you, for any reason, then they're very poor ("toxic") friends. I'd say give them time...but after a year-I wouldn't be so sure. Did you do anything to offend them??

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    • scandinavia
      13 years ago | pl

      I agree...

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  • kellstar
    13 years ago | pl

    Great advice as usual again soccer2. I agree! Try new things and you will have something else on your mind.

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  • Echoes
    13 years ago | pl

    I would try new activities where I can meet new guys and make friends with. Your current friends seem to have a gang mentality. If you did something that really upset them, try apologising or clearing the misunderstanding if any.

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    • AlixPerez
      13 years ago | pl

      The fact that I never did anything to upset the (whole) group is what makes it all so strange, I feel/felt (it's getting better atm) like they just didn't like me anymore. This led to me not knowing what to talk about anymore to anyone really. Daaamn it's been a mess. Thanks for your advice everyone! Big up! My advice to you:
      Don't make anyone your priority who doesn't make you theirs!

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago | pl

    Try to be the person you were with these people regardless of the gf issue. I agree that you have to be OK with it for them to. They don't won't to be drawn into it.

    Secondly, it sounds like a group or clique more than friends. Isn't there anyone in there who you feel close to & has empathy for you? If so cultivate those relationships. If not, you need real friends, not to be just part of a group.

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  • yeggman
    13 years ago | pl

    If your friend is dating your ex then he is a bum and not your friend.

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