Don't be afraid to strike out on your own! Have ya'll tried marital counseling? Even if he is unwilling to go to counseling himself, see a marriage, and family therapist on your own. Do things to foster healing, and the good in yourself. Pray, meditate, seek out help for yourself, and know that none of this is your fault!
Your spouse is for whatever reason a sex addict who is addicted to pornography. People like him are simultaneously sex addicts, and sexual anorexics. They are sex addicts for the obvious reasons in that they are addicted to pornography, and acting out with themselves. You're husband is also a sexual anorexic in that he is not physically intimate with you, the person with whom he should be physically intimate. It's really fucked up, selfish and immature. Your spouse needs to start going to meetings of Sex Addicts Anonymous! He needs to be a man, and face up to the reality of life!
There are many excellent books out there about sex addiction, and two that come to mind are: Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick J Carnes Ph.D, and In the Shadows of the Net: Breaking Free of Compulsive Online Sexual Behavior also by Patrick Carnes. I highly recommend that you check your local library for those books, or perhaps purchase them. These books are excellent reading on the subject of sex addiction.
I also think you should check out the twelve step programs of COSA, and Codependents Anonymous. If there is a history of any type of addiction, or dysfunction in your family of origin you can also check out Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families.
Here are some helps links for you to copy, and paste onto your browser:
http://www.cosa-recovery.org/whatis.html
https://saa-recovery.org/
https://adultchildren.org/
If you feel that you want to divorce this pathetic, and selfish man then be sure to gather as much evidence as possible, and document everything you can. Find a good lawyer, reclaim your maiden name if you took his name, and be sure to sue for child support if you have children under 18. If he is unwilling to accept responsibility for his wrongdoing, and improve himself then know that you deserve better than him, and his selfish degeneracy.
Do not allow yourself to defined by how this wretched, selfish and pathetic person has mistreated, and neglected you.
You are most welcome, dear heart! You are not alone in your struggle. There are many other women, and men whose spouses neglect them, because of the garbage that is pornography. This is not your fault. Even if your appearance has changed over the years it's the responsibility of your spouse to communicate with you about these sort of things instead of acting out out with pornography, and getting high off of masturbation.
For instance even if you gain weight, and he's no longer attracted to you then he should be able tell you rather just retreating into sexual fantasies in his mind, and in pornography.
Should I move on
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Don't be afraid to strike out on your own! Have ya'll tried marital counseling? Even if he is unwilling to go to counseling himself, see a marriage, and family therapist on your own. Do things to foster healing, and the good in yourself. Pray, meditate, seek out help for yourself, and know that none of this is your fault!
Your spouse is for whatever reason a sex addict who is addicted to pornography. People like him are simultaneously sex addicts, and sexual anorexics. They are sex addicts for the obvious reasons in that they are addicted to pornography, and acting out with themselves. You're husband is also a sexual anorexic in that he is not physically intimate with you, the person with whom he should be physically intimate. It's really fucked up, selfish and immature. Your spouse needs to start going to meetings of Sex Addicts Anonymous! He needs to be a man, and face up to the reality of life!
There are many excellent books out there about sex addiction, and two that come to mind are: Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction by Patrick J Carnes Ph.D, and In the Shadows of the Net: Breaking Free of Compulsive Online Sexual Behavior also by Patrick Carnes. I highly recommend that you check your local library for those books, or perhaps purchase them. These books are excellent reading on the subject of sex addiction.
I also think you should check out the twelve step programs of COSA, and Codependents Anonymous. If there is a history of any type of addiction, or dysfunction in your family of origin you can also check out Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families.
Here are some helps links for you to copy, and paste onto your browser:
http://www.cosa-recovery.org/whatis.html
https://saa-recovery.org/
https://adultchildren.org/
If you feel that you want to divorce this pathetic, and selfish man then be sure to gather as much evidence as possible, and document everything you can. Find a good lawyer, reclaim your maiden name if you took his name, and be sure to sue for child support if you have children under 18. If he is unwilling to accept responsibility for his wrongdoing, and improve himself then know that you deserve better than him, and his selfish degeneracy.
Do not allow yourself to defined by how this wretched, selfish and pathetic person has mistreated, and neglected you.
I wish you all the best, and Godspeed! 😎
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Sunsetbeach
4 years ago
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Thank you very much for your feedback, I appreciate it!
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RoseIsabella
4 years ago
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You are most welcome, dear heart! You are not alone in your struggle. There are many other women, and men whose spouses neglect them, because of the garbage that is pornography. This is not your fault. Even if your appearance has changed over the years it's the responsibility of your spouse to communicate with you about these sort of things instead of acting out out with pornography, and getting high off of masturbation.
For instance even if you gain weight, and he's no longer attracted to you then he should be able tell you rather just retreating into sexual fantasies in his mind, and in pornography.