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My 11 year old son will be starting secondary school in september of this year. He has been saying that he is worried out the work, whether he will get into fights etc. My son very rarely gets into any altercations and if he does i ensure that is dealt with immediately. Should I be worried?
I felt like that when I started high school, I'm now in year 11 and leaving in 3 months. I'd heard all these things about people beating up year sevens and flushing your head down the toilet, and really believed it but none of it actually happens. The best advice to give him would be to keep his head down, keeping himself and his friends,ignore any nasty comments and dont rise to the bait, its sorts things out a hell of a lot easier than flaring up does. Trust me :)
dont worry he should be fine.when i started secondry school i was terrified,but after about a week i got used to the way the school is and what not to do around older students.so just give him a few weeks and ask him how its going.im going into my third year in the most over crowded school in ireland and one of the most in europe its supposed to have 950 students in it but now has 1767 students.im quite a shy person to people i dont know and i managed to do it so i think your son will be just fine just dont worry too much!
Isn't 11 a little young to be starting high school, even if he turns 12 later? What, he's going to graduate at 15-16 years old?
If so maybe he has concerns about peers being, and always being, several years older - at an age when that difference is still huge socially, emotionally & physically.
You are right to be worried, to speak further with your son and if the age difference is the case, to speak to the school.
I don't quite agree with some of the other posters. 11 is pretty young. He needs a parent & it seems to me you are a good one & have the trust of your son. If you had gone overboard/lacked judgement before he would not be confiding in you.
I say trust your instincts as a parent - they seem to have served you well.
Your anxiety is going to turn him into a freak. Stop worrying. He needs to live life on his own. Monitor him, but you don't need to step in when school hasn't even started. He's not going into the war, yet..
Thank you sooo much for your comment, because i finally realise what I could potentially do to my son if i do not back off a bit. I will let him find his way, but I will stay in the backround more and wait to be asked if he does ever need advice or has concerns. (your comment was sooo funny, i burst out laughing, thanks again).
I finished high school last year and i was very very scared when i was starting it. it was the scariet thing i've ever done!
To be honest, i think you should try and let him be more independant so he can learn to do things on his own. cos he's gona need to learn it in high school and you dont want him to lear the hard way.
Fear is just nature's way of saying, "be careful." Eleven seems like an appropriate age to begin to learn to deal with it in a positive way.
I think you really must be a pretty good parent if he is even willing to talk to you about something so personal. I would have never done so with my parents, and they were perfectly good people (I'm ready to talk now, but they're dead).
Keep talking. Try to give him some tools to help him be comfortable in new situations.
From your post it sounds like you mother him too much if you deal with his fights and troubles. We all went through it going from being the senior to being the junior. Life is full of challenges let him face them head before you turn him into a mummys boy and have him living with you till he becomes a 40 year old virgin
Every kid is worried leading up to that start of secondary school, and 99%% of the time everything goes fine :D just keep assuring him that it'll all go grand and it most probably will :)