Scared that sex will hurt.

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4 Comments

I'm a 18 year old fresh out of high school with a boyfriend (19 yrs freshman in collage) and we've been dating all off my high school years. And we are very intamite as it is but never went to that next step (meaning sex). I know that he wants it but I'm the one that's scared. Any adivce to overcoming? And gals how was your first time. I know its going to hurt but pain level to 1-10? And guys were you scared of hurting your partner on your first time? Help is greatly welcomed. And thank you for your time. =)

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80% Normal
Based on 5 votes (4 yes)
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Comments ( 4 )
  • old_guy
    9 years ago

    be on top so you can control the pressure make sure you are good and wet before starting

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  • LadyMeister
    10 years ago

    Here's the deal, it won't necessarily hurt. That is a myth created by Western culture and perpetuated because young girls get so nervous because they THINK it is going to hurt. Truth is, if they would calm down it would not be so bad. I had an orgasm my first time.

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  • TerryVie
    12 years ago

    Yeah, it hurts, but you are both old enough to expect a sensitive partner, and a time when you both want to take this step.

    I can assure you, when talking about it hurting, it's more about cases like mine, several years earlier, with a hasty and inexperienced partner, being pressured into it.

    If you are scared, you tense up, which in turn makes it more probable it hurts, which again scares you. Try and not get into this cycle.

    As for advice: Around orgasm time, the brain gets confused and actually mixes pleasure and pain up a bit. Also, lowered inhibitions may help.
    So i would suggest that you have a little drink(really just a little, like slightly tipsy, not even slightly drunk), and then start with a foreplay focused on getting you to a first orgasm. When you came, or are close to coming, it will be "easier" for him to enter without you "thinking" too much about it or tightening up from tension. Thats to say he still should take it slowly, or, if you are comfortable with that, you could be the controlling partner(cowgirl), but do it in a setting where you are unlikely to "think" too much and start worrying, because that could be a downward cycle.

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  • iamfarva
    14 years ago

    I'm 20 and I've taken two girls virginitys, and both times I took it as slow as they wanted, only going deeper when she was ready. I asked both of them about it, and they said that it hurt, but you just have to work through it because the outcome is fantastic. so do it when your ready, and make sure he treats you right =)

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