Dude, the only way you'd asphyxiate a woman who was giving you head was if you were much stronger than her, you held her head firmly, shoved your penis right down her throat and held it there for some time. In that situation, any sane woman who wasn't incapacitated due to drugs or booze would start thrashing around, clawing at you and probably gnawing on your dick once she realised you weren't going to let her get a breath.
The only way a woman is going to "break" you penis (rupture the internal structures) is if she forcefully bends it. I guess it's possible for this to happen if the woman is really rough, but my understanding is that penile fracture happens most commonly during rough, fast cowgirl sex. The woman goes up, the penis _almost_ comes out of the vagina, she comes down with all her weight while the penis is misaligned with the vagina, and that forces it to bend double.
With regards to the fear of "breaking" it, I should have mentioned that my foreskin is uncut, so it's not so much the fear of my penis being bent out of shape, but rather the fact that the membrane which connects my foreskin to the head of my penis could be accidentally torn if she really tries hard to give me pleasure.
That was what I meant by "too overenthusiastic".
Even if the girl in question knows what she's doing, the fear of this happening persists. It means I can never feel comfortable enough to enjoy it.
Also, the asphyxiation line was sarcasm... I'd never actively try to stop a woman breathing. Like I said I care for her wellbeing as much as my own at all times. I've just seen male pornstars holding female pornstars' heads down on their dick (only for them to inevitably and expectedly cough and splutter vomit all over them) way too often.
Fair enough. It's your dick, and you know it better than anyone else ever will.
For what it's worth, I've received quite a few blow-jobs from several women over the years, and I've never experienced a torn frenulum. But it does happen, I imagine it's pretty uncomfortable and I understand how being terrified of this happening could kill your hard.
There's no requirement that you must enjoy or even tolerate receiving oral sex. The only real problem here is that if you let a woman start and then you go limp, she's likely to take that as an implied criticism of her technique, and that can totally kill the mood. It would be far better for you to let her know that it just isn't your thing before her mouth gets anywhere near your dick. I would hope most women would simply accept that, just as you should be willing to accept their preferences. If a woman should expresses curiosity about why you don't want it, telling her the truth probably isn't a great idea since that would again be questioning her skills. Maybe you could just say that "things" happened in the past that make it triggering for you.
When and if you're in a long-term relationship, you might consider opening up to the woman about your apprehensions. Some women really enjoy giving head.
If a woman were to ask me why I don't like it, I would be honest about my apprehension.
There's no need to bring her "skills" into it. How well she is able to give head is irrelevant when my fears surrounding the act are already so profound.
Recieving a BJ kills my boner. IIN?
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Dude, the only way you'd asphyxiate a woman who was giving you head was if you were much stronger than her, you held her head firmly, shoved your penis right down her throat and held it there for some time. In that situation, any sane woman who wasn't incapacitated due to drugs or booze would start thrashing around, clawing at you and probably gnawing on your dick once she realised you weren't going to let her get a breath.
The only way a woman is going to "break" you penis (rupture the internal structures) is if she forcefully bends it. I guess it's possible for this to happen if the woman is really rough, but my understanding is that penile fracture happens most commonly during rough, fast cowgirl sex. The woman goes up, the penis _almost_ comes out of the vagina, she comes down with all her weight while the penis is misaligned with the vagina, and that forces it to bend double.
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Anonymous Post Author
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Sorry, I should have been clearer.
With regards to the fear of "breaking" it, I should have mentioned that my foreskin is uncut, so it's not so much the fear of my penis being bent out of shape, but rather the fact that the membrane which connects my foreskin to the head of my penis could be accidentally torn if she really tries hard to give me pleasure.
That was what I meant by "too overenthusiastic".
Even if the girl in question knows what she's doing, the fear of this happening persists. It means I can never feel comfortable enough to enjoy it.
Also, the asphyxiation line was sarcasm... I'd never actively try to stop a woman breathing. Like I said I care for her wellbeing as much as my own at all times. I've just seen male pornstars holding female pornstars' heads down on their dick (only for them to inevitably and expectedly cough and splutter vomit all over them) way too often.
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Fair enough. It's your dick, and you know it better than anyone else ever will.
For what it's worth, I've received quite a few blow-jobs from several women over the years, and I've never experienced a torn frenulum. But it does happen, I imagine it's pretty uncomfortable and I understand how being terrified of this happening could kill your hard.
There's no requirement that you must enjoy or even tolerate receiving oral sex. The only real problem here is that if you let a woman start and then you go limp, she's likely to take that as an implied criticism of her technique, and that can totally kill the mood. It would be far better for you to let her know that it just isn't your thing before her mouth gets anywhere near your dick. I would hope most women would simply accept that, just as you should be willing to accept their preferences. If a woman should expresses curiosity about why you don't want it, telling her the truth probably isn't a great idea since that would again be questioning her skills. Maybe you could just say that "things" happened in the past that make it triggering for you.
When and if you're in a long-term relationship, you might consider opening up to the woman about your apprehensions. Some women really enjoy giving head.
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If a woman were to ask me why I don't like it, I would be honest about my apprehension.
There's no need to bring her "skills" into it. How well she is able to give head is irrelevant when my fears surrounding the act are already so profound.