Pregnant and boyfriend doesn't buy anything

29% Normal
25 Comments

I am pregnant, due end of November. Been with boyfriend for 5 years.
He doesn't celebrate birthdays but I always buy him something really nice yet he has never given me a bday present. I never complain yet it really hurts it would be nice to feel special.
He is good to me in other ways kind, funny and everything else but another thing I am pregnant and I have bought mostly everything, he has bought a few clothes and things (cos I asked him)
but I have saved since we found out and he has saved nothing! Ok so he has rent to pay (I don't) - we are moving in together this month and he is also paying for other things but he could save something!
Just feel like it is all on me and scared that it will always be me paying for everything.

Voting Results
29% Normal
Based on 82 votes (24 yes)
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Comments ( 25 )
  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    I guess you'd feel a bit better if your nest was feathered more! But share your concerns with your baby's father and let him know that you need, want & welcome his support and involvement.

    Get him to prenatal. And talk finances together as a team - so they are a shared responsibility. Consider credit or other financial counseling & ways you can increase financial literacy.

    And let him know that he has to treat you and the baby right by celebrating ALL birthdays - say it to him just as you did here - that it is about being special. It is about being loved and respected.

    He'll come around.

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  • sokosquare
    14 years ago

    shame sister. i feel your pain but its up to you to tell him how you feel..... women never get it... if you never speak about a problem its not suddenly going to fix itself.......... talk about it let him know what you think and if his a good guy he will work it through with you.

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  • skyhuh24
    13 years ago

    I don't understand why you have a child when you're not even married. That's really trashy. I feel sorry for the baby.

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    • junglejuice123
      11 years ago

      wow, your a piece of shit! Who the fuck are you? Jesus? What you makes you think your shit dont stink? Are you perfect or a jehovahs witness?! Fuck you. I had a baby after i was married, and guess what it doesnt make a fucking difference, and my parents ARE jehovahs witnesses. So no arguement you inconciderate fuck. If i knew where you lived i fuckin hurt you!!! Your so fuckin ignorant your mother did a great job.

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      • zlofton
        9 years ago

        Damn you're a fucking prick. You couldn't hurt a fly you scrawny piece of shit. lol, internet warriors these days.

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    • matthewkoehler
      7 years ago

      I agree it is wrong.

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    • Ellenna
      9 years ago

      What, like Joseph & Mary? Biblical trailer trash ......

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  • Avant-Garde
    9 years ago

    Talk to him and take parenting classes with him. He needs to be more enthusiastic and involved.

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  • zlofton
    9 years ago

    He pays rent doesn't he? why dont you get a goddamn job you ungrateful whore!

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  • watermelonninja
    10 years ago

    You met him like this, its no one alses fault!

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  • mai_noku
    11 years ago

    Gosh you guys don't READ!! This was years ago now but anyway..... I clearly said we don't live together yet and that he pays rent where he lived (I was still at my parents) so no he wasn't paying OUR rent. We didn't have bills to pay THEN. I bought the pram, 99% clothes, and other bits....we then did live together and I paid 70% of the rent he only paid 30% even though he earned more than me.....I paid ALL bills he bought groceries occasionally.....he spent his money on gadgets I however spent high majority on toys, clothing, footwear and other necessities for my children (we have 2)and very little for myself let alone anything expensive like the gadgets he was getting.....
    Anyway, that was a while ago things have now changed since I had his mother have spoken to him, he now pays half out MORTGAGE and half bills and is now wise with his money and saves it and thats how we have a mortgage and had a lovely WEDDING so to the person who said its trashy to have kids before marriage I really think you have some issues to make you say something so ridiculous...
    So next time you read a question people, MAKE SURE YOU READ IT PROPERLY don't just skim through as you'll end up looking foolish to the people who actually read it correctly ;)

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  • junglejuice123
    11 years ago

    guys dont have pay for everything. but if its there kid buy some shit. And appreciate what he does buy because some dads dont buy or do shit for there own.

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    • mai_noku
      11 years ago

      who said pay for everything? Not me. I just wanted 50/50...

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  • cookiesaregreat
    12 years ago

    why do you think 'you will end up paying for everything'? he pays the rent doesn't he? sheesh

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    • mai_noku
      11 years ago

      read again, he paid rent for the place HE was living in. I wasn't living with him at the time like I said so therefore I was living at parents rent free so had none to pay.......

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      • cookiesaregreat
        11 years ago

        but.. its already 2 years later, how did it end up going?

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    • PapzBSlim
      11 years ago

      Lol this is what I was going to reply with. He is paying rent and the moving stuff etc. Maybe she expects he pay for everything himself and she keep her whole paycheck to herself, so she can buy a birthday present for herself.

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      • Ellenna
        9 years ago

        I think she should buy herself birthday & xmas presents if he's too mean to do so, but definitely not buy him any .. see how he likes that

        I had a bf once who actually deliberately broke up with me just before my birthday and xmas so he wouldn't have to buy me presents - true, he told mutual friends who told me. I laughed and pointed out that he didn't get presents from me either after he broke us up! Idiot ....

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      • mai_noku
        11 years ago

        *sigh* read my post properly....

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      • cookiesaregreat
        11 years ago

        Haha that would be a good one xD but for some reason, most women always expect their man to pay for everything.

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        • mai_noku
          11 years ago

          I don't know any woman that expects their man to pay for everything, that is ridiculous. Women I know, including myself want 50/50

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        • PapzBSlim
          11 years ago

          Lol very true. Thank God that my girlfriend is very independent.

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          • mai_noku
            11 years ago

            I believe most women are...

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  • pamela
    14 years ago

    i feel bad for u, dont think its just u, this could actually be a guy thing. most arnt very good when it comes to things like this. tho with the baby coming along your right there is no reason for him not to save anything to just get a small gift for the baby i really feel bad for u, u should have a talk with him about your feelings i hope things get better for you x

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  • Sarcasm70
    14 years ago

    You have every reason to be scared. It might be wise to tell him what you think about this. Sometimes men need to hear things clearly since they don%%u2019t get the not so subtle hints we give them. I paid most of the baby stuff, or received them as gift, while I was pregnant. My BF didn%%u2019t care so much about baby stuff, but he paid his share of rent, car, etc., accordingly. Communications is the answer. Do it now, you%%u2019ll both be parents soon and you%%u2019ll have bigger things to think about. Good luck and congrats!

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