Pray eat love

It is my real life story but I wanted to share with people who understand the big word LOVE, not to get condemmed and scolded here!

Who doesn't want a life like Julia Roberts?

I wanted my life just lke hers.

But never felt quite like it!

I am married to my first boyfriend because I love hm deeply and I predicted him to love me forever.

We are married for 10 years now. Yes , I am bored with my marriage because we no longer have common goals and interests. We just do routines like shop and eat together. Sometimes, I feel like getting out of this marriage but never have the guts to do so!

Yes! Hubby is decent honest rountine fellow. Nothng really bad about him!

I felt like tearing myself apart not because I hate this marriage but I cant see myself growing , like becoming a mum , to have kids like it. Goodness me! I am surrounded by married friends and people everyday! I felt like a failure at times.

I never hated my hubby , in fact, i respected him in many ways but never want to hurt him because he ever cried 2 hours non stop when i want to end the marriage.

I just dun connect well with him anymore.

I am so evil and stupid when i did something wrong to my marriage. I fell in love with an older man who has seen and been through all in life. He used to be a pilot. He seemed to understand me better and strangely, he let me understand what's love is again ! But this man has his mood swings! Already 46, he is not capable of taking much nonsense, and there is a sense of seriousness in him at times.

But again, I am not sure if I should believe this older man when he says I LOVE you to me!

Most of you will probably ask me to get of my marriage , do some real soul searching about whats going on here but in terms of Love , who is there right to judge me here?

Tell me where I should move with heart and moral in balance:)