Porn and my boyfriend

I have a boyfriend. He doesn't always watch porn, but on occasion he does. I don't know, but for some reason whenever he does I get jealous. I don't watch porn. I can only be intimate with someone that I am comfortable around, and have strong feelings for. I've told him how I felt about him, and watching porn. I figure, why watch porn, when he has me. We've been together for 3 years now.

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Based on 370 votes (244 yes)
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Comments ( 40 )
  • I used to watch porn all the time. The very first day I've talked to my girlfriend, I just felt it was wrong. So I haven't masterbated to porn or watched any porn for 10 months and I'm happier without it cause it's fake anyways and my girlfriend satisfies my every need :)

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  • AppleBlossom

    Honestly I thought I was the only person Who hates internet porn and tv porn... This is the first person I could every relate to !

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  • misschelseaxo

    I love porn! Quite often I'll watch it when the bf is at work. :)

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  • jandkb

    My opinion: it's a matter of respect.
    You don't feel like he should want to look at other naked hot girls if he's got you, right?
    And he just doesn't understand why you get so upset about it because "it's a guy thing" and "every guy does it"
    well...
    not every guy does it.
    some people say that if you think your guy isn't watching porn its because he's hiding it very well.
    lie.
    my fiance watches it and i HATE it. i compare myself to those girls constantly and never feel good enough.
    but he says he really doesn't pay attention to the girls, its seriously just the ACT of sex that gets him off.
    while it made me feel a little better, (not much) i still dont believe that...but idk what to do.
    what you feel is completely normal.
    If he respects you COMPLETELY he will stop.
    if he doesn't, then try to suggest counseling or something because he may be addicted.
    be careful though, thats a whole different subject. telling an addict that what they "need" is bad and they can't have it can take a large toll on a relationship.

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    • MasonHanes

      I want a girl who likes me enough not to watch porn .-.

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  • truthteller22

    okay first of all to all you dumb guys who think its okay to watch porn while you have a gf who you say your crazy about..you must not be that crazy about that girl if you feel the need to watch sluty girls online. one day your girl will leave you and all you will have is porn. ask yourself do you want the real thing or the slut online?

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  • Freckly

    I think its normal to feel threatened by porn, but you need to remember he loves you, and not just for sexual reasons but for much more. Porn is just something guys use to masturbate, maybe you could suggest taking some dirty pictures of yourself that he could use to masturbate too?

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  • notTHEman

    dude, let him be, you know? Porn is like a gateway. Fantasy, fetish (whatever weird/normal thing he's into)--it's all there. and so are you. he's intimate with you still soooo, that's good. itf he starts becoming intimate with porn...then that's a problem. Other than than, maybe he's using porn as a sort of release if you know what i mean. or maybe he's training for you lol

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    • happycamper12

      we try things that he sees in porn. i know of all his fetishes and i play along. he masturbates to it. we dont live together, so im not always around when hes in the mood though.

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      • truthteller22

        he shouldnt watch porn though... ask him how he would feel if you were watching sexy hot guys online..he probaby wouldnt like it.

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  • truthteller22

    and its not okay for guys to watch porn while in a relationship.honestly dont tell the girl you love her if your going to go watch porn.she will end up leaveing most of them do. because they want there guy only looking at them. not some ugly ass sluts who probably have a STD from fucking all those guys. thats just nasty. 43

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  • TerribleTadpole

    I suspect that your jealousy is at least partly because you're not involved in what's happening when he's watching porn, and you feel like he's getting something from it that he's not getting from you. How about you try including yourself in what's going on. Maybe the porn doesn't do anything for you - people respond to different things and his "bag" might not be yours.

    But does it get you hot when he's aroused?

    So get involved in how it makes your boyfriend feel. I once had a partner for several years who was quite keen on porn, and it made for some of the most stimulating lovemaking you can imagine. I wasn't allowed to watch it too intently or she'd get offended. So instead I focused my attention on how she was responding. Ah, the things she'd let me do to her while her every nerve was standing on end and she was jumping out of her skin. I let my imagination run wild!

    You've probably got a few fantasy's of your own you'd like to explore. Let his excitement fuel yours. He's much more likely to go along with anything you want to try when he's wild.

    Try setting the negative feelings to one side. Try accepting this side of your partner and exploring what opportunities it might present. If it doesn't turn out good then you've lost nothing, and at least you've tried. If it turns out good, it could be wonderful!

    Good luck.

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  • herbivore

    I'm sorry, but I totally disagree with most people here. When evaluating whether an action is right/wrong I think most people will just ask themselves 'do I do it?' Yes I look at porn, or yes all my good friends look at porn so therefore its good etc.
    I look at porn occasionally, and when I do, I am not as attracted to my girlfriend as I am without it. I find myself checking out other girls a lot more and even making mental notes on what it would be like to do different things to these girls.
    You have to be loving and patient with someone, but if something they do makes you feel uncomfortable, despite what people here say, you should let them know or do something about it.

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    • #realspit

      This gotta be the realest reply to them all ! regardless if guys or girls watch porn , were human beings , we look at other attraactive human beings , its wired into us . i have a gf and we do not look at porn , i do sometimes but not very often at all cuz i got her. i love her . but itd be a lie if i said i dont look at other attractive women . i look but dont touch thats what its all about , going on 5 years an im still faithful ! an im no where being an ugly guy (no offense)

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  • Justin_Case

    I totally agree with you , I am age 41 I am a male But if I had a girlfriend , I would not be watching any kind of porn
    Yes i do admit it's a replacement for
    real love , I wouldn't watch porn and have a girlfriend

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    • happycamper12

      thanks for your thoughts

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  • Nomolos

    It's a natural thing. I have a girl that I am crazy about and we do have sex. But you can't always be having sex with your partner or it seems to be a one dimensional relationship, and I doubt you want that.

    Sometimes it is just something that a guy has to do. It relieves stress and can change your mindset if it needs to be done.

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  • ieatrocksdirt

    it could be worse. like if he was out actually having sex with other people then i can see how that would become problematic. lol
    idk, i used to have similar issues with my boyfriend looking at porn. i have thought about it ALOT.
    people like sex. we are wired to do it. so he is going to get off one way or another right? and sometimes maybe you dont feel like sex.. lol why shouldnt he be able to do things on his own? btw maybe you should consider checkin out some porn on your own to get his perspective??
    there may be a problem if he chooses to look at porn RATHER than be with you. but other than that i would say its rather normal for him to enjoy porn.

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    • happycamper12

      okay thank you so much. i dont know i guess its just human nature for me to get jealous. but he most definitely rather be with me or be sexual with me than watch porn.

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  • xxVIXxx

    I knw exactly how you feel and you have every right to fell that way. Not EVERY guy watches porn. There are self respecting MEN out there that think it's just as disgusting as you and I. Maybe you are not with the right guy for you and should find someone with the same interests as yourself.

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  • yuki_m

    I get what you're saying, my husband has his occasional trysts with the late night pornos. What you have to understand is, porn has nothing to do with you. I know, you're thinking "Well DUH", but think about it. Guys are seriously horny creatures and thinking about sex takes up the majority of their brain cells. For guys, porn is sort of like a romantic comedy is for women.

    I've had this conversation with half a dozen of my girlfriends, and it's pointless... I think I'm the only female who doesn't have an issue with porn.

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    • happycamper12

      i understand the whole deal of it. i just get jealous, and can't help it, you know?

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  • truthteller22

    you guys need to learn to think with your head not your fuc*ing dic*. then maybe less guys would cheat!!

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  • ladypinky

    Why don't you watch it with him? me and my boyfriend watch porn together and he likes that much more than watching it alone.

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  • AmINormal789

    Have sex with him more. Spice it up in the bedroom.

    If my boyfriend was watching porn, Id assume it was because I was gone, or was not able to have sex with him for whatever reason. If i was able to, he'd go to me. And your guy should do the same. Are you both at home while hes doing this? Or is it like, when you're gone?

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  • agregg

    I'm in a relationship and I mastrubate to porn. My girlfriend and I have sex and it's just great. Men watch porn and pleasure themselves for fun. Not because somethig is wrong. You wouldn't understand unless ur a dude.

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    • truthteller22

      not true. how would you guys feel if your girlfriends were watching sexy hot guys online?

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  • LoveLVR

    Awwww girl I feel your problem. When my boyfriend and i first started to date he had porn and into the relationship he put one on for his friend, his friends girl friend and me. I was so upset i pretended i was asleep! I couldn't believe he would do something like that, im thinking what does he want all of us to want each other or what! He knew i was so mad about it he got rid of them and its not wrong for you to want to be the only girl he sees naked the girls on those movies are hoes for doing that on tape. Your way better than them ok just tell your boyfriend you don't like that he watches them and make him get rid of them...

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    • happycamper12

      thank you hun:)

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  • olivia82

    It means you want to sleep with someone else.

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  • I love watching porn with a guy and love sucking dick while watching porno. Me and my boyfriend watch porn before bed every night and I suck his dick while we watch it

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  • mazza019

    I'm a woman, and I watch porn. I often find that if I'm on my own, it's hard to get off without that visual stimulus. I have no qualms with porn, I think it's wonderful.
    But when you're in a relationship, and available to have satisfying sex with eachother often, porn shouldn't be in the equation unless you watch it together.
    My boyfriend is currently in Afghanistan, and won't be home for months, so I'm perfectly OK with him watching porn until he gets home. But when he does, I'll stop watching it cause the real thing is 1000x better.
    Also, as a side note, porn is addictive and dulls the sexual senses. If you're seeing all kinds of naked bodies all the time, when you see someone's in real life it won't be a shock, and probably won't turn you on as much. Plus it makes you get bored of the same thing easier (I've had this problem). Since when has anyone been able to watch the same single porn film every time to get off?
    Real life has more variety and real orgasms, lol. I don't know about other women, but I'm willing to have sex whenever, however, as many times a day as my man will let me. So there really isn't any time for porn!

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  • skyrim

    Don't worrie we just need the release

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  • I understand how you feel. Us women are different I guess.

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  • shay01

    i have the opposite problem i love porn i don't watch it all the time i don't plan to watch it ill just be flickin the the tv come across something and thats that my husband says it's not okay for me to watch with out him i say leave me alone

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  • smearmyeyeliner

    Nothing wrong with porn, aslong as you're having a healthy sexual relationship I see no problem, sometimes porn actually helps people stay sexually active, if you cut off the porn then he might stop feeling sexed.

    I understand your jealousy though, maybe try to watch it with him? Maybe try to share a fetish? If you truly can't stay it, ask him to stop watching it, or at the very least don't watch it infront of you and wait till you are out or something.

    Hope that helps. Xx

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  • frankr

    I am sure that porn has been in his life way before he met you. It is like a security blanket.

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  • joelsmo

    Join him or stop nagging. If you told him to stop breathing he wouldn't do that either

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  • agregg

    Girls who comment on this subject who say it's not right are no absolutly no position to judge. Your not a male you wouldn't understand. Women watch romantic movies and sometimes those are basically soft core pornos. Don't get so worked u because some dude wants to has fun with his body.

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  • JewCoon

    He doesn't love you. Easy as that! He wants other woman and you do not satisfy him sexually. Try anal or hive him more/better head. Let him cum on your titts. Can't hurt ^_^

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