Normal to feel the urge to selfharm at night
I know I shouldn't do it and I don't anymore ok!!!! I was just wondering if any other selfharmers feel as though they want to do it at night, because I really do.
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I know I shouldn't do it and I don't anymore ok!!!! I was just wondering if any other selfharmers feel as though they want to do it at night, because I really do.
I mainly did it at night. I'm at home, it's the end of the day, and whatever "deeds" that I wanted to "punish myself" for were ripe in my mind and increased by my thoughts of it throughout the day.
To anyone reading this who hasn't quit... You know all of the stupid emotional and health reasons but here's the main reason I quit it: 72 Hour lockup is easy to do to someone if they have self-harm wounds. People will do it if they are concerned. People will do it to fuck with you. I have had it done for BOTH. It sucks, it's terrible and you're treated like a subhuman among peers who either got in trouble with the law and are forced to be there or people worse than you.
In addition, the scars left can fuck you out of employment, easily. It wasn't until I got tattoed that the reactions went away. And no, wearing long sleeves isn't always an option. Also no, makeup and tanning don't work. All of this, I know from experience.
I don't see it as any different from tattoing if you're using clean blades and providing yourself the proper first aid but it is a sign of having deep problems and you don't want people who aren't close to you knowing that shit about you because they will judge and it can cost you.
I've known a few people who've self harmed and yes I think night time is the normal time for them to do it when they're alone in the dark and have nothing to distract them from their thoughts and are less likely to be interrupted. It's really good that you're making the effort to stop though, good luck with your recovery :)
When I did it, it was both day and night, but mostly at night. At night it was more private; I knew I wouldn't get caught if I did it late. Only times I've done it in the day were once I was out of school and home alone.
It's normal in that there are more pros to doing it at night, so people are more likely to do that during this time, and it's unfortunate to say that self harm is getting increasingly 'normal', something many people of all ages have to go through.
Sorry to hear that you've had to suffer through that, but congratulations on you breaking away from that, and I hope you can keep that pause permanent. If not, please talk to people, there are many self-harm 'hotline' websites you can find by googling (I'm sorry that I have none to recommend).