My sisters husband keeps hitting on me

My older sister married a nice guy about 2 years ago, but in the last couple of months when I’m alone with him I feel he’s hitting on me . I’m single and 20 and he’s the same age as my sister who’s 34.
I had sort of seen him as being like the big brother I never had and I felt a bond to him and liked to get his advice about relationships and stuff . But lately he’s had been putting his arm around me when we speak on he puts his hand on my leg. He’s also stated pecking me on the lips when we part company and complimenting me on my looks and figure and saying things like “Any man would want me in his bed”

I’ve backed off him but he turns up at my place for a chat and I end up on the sofa with him and spending the whole time brushing his hands off me. And now, on his last visit he has said the he loves me and wants to sleep with me. What shall I do?

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Based on 50 votes (13 yes)
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Comments ( 36 )
  • Tealights

    I was going to give some solid advice until I read one of your reply comments,"sallyjane1: Look, I didn't say that I wasn't attracted to him, I am, deeply and I admit that things have gone on a a lot further than I wrote in the post. i haven't actually let him sleep with me yet, but we have done things that are leading to it am finding it hard to resist that last step. That's why I'm not sure what to do."

    Are you serious? You made it seem like he was a nuisance, but you actually like it and let it go on further than it should. You make it seem like you're powerless, but you're not. You're simply conflicted on becoming this asshole's side-ass so he can bang you and your sis in the same day, or betraying your sister.

    Ugh..., do whatever you think is right. I have a friend like you, who is deeply in love with a marriage guy and has sex with him all that time when his wife is at work. Sometimes I laugh at her, because she's telling me all this shit about," Oh he loves me! He's going to leave his wife! He's so unhappy with her, and he tells me I make him feel alive," and all this bullshit. This bitch been telling her this for 2 years. 2 damn years, and she still believes him and gives him ass whenever and however. I tell her that he's just using her, but she got pissed off at me, so oh well.

    So gurly, if you want to be this scumbag's side-ass, then go for it. Hurt your sister's trust, and play her for a fool while you have sex in her bed; because that's all you'll be. He doesn't love you; hell, he doesn't even love your sister, but I bet he's not going to divorce her, because why? He has a wife to cook/clean/have children with/ etc, and he has the young sister to get sex from when the wife is away or too tired.

    Please do the right thing and just tell him no.

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  • SmokeEverything

    This is what alcohol and threesomes are for

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    • nikkiclaire

      I agree, you cant just betray your sister so tell her whats going on and let her know you would be willing to fuck her husband with her. Get drunk together and fuck his brains out, but you have to let her be part of it. Family always comes first. You should please your sister while he fucks you too.

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  • Angelandme

    Sleep with him and stop pretending you don't know where this was going. It's what you probably want anyway. "Oh I let him my house but I didn't know he would be even more open to showing me his feelings there oh no I hope he doesn't fuck me" *fingers crossed* you're very transparent OP.

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    • sallyjane1

      Look, I didn't say that I wasn't attracted to him, I am, deeply and I admit that things have gone on a a lot further than I wrote in the post. i haven't actually let him sleep with me yet, but we have done things that are leading to it am finding it hard to resist that last step. That's why I'm not sure what to do.

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      • Angelandme

        Well you took that well. If he cheats on your sister with you he is not worth being your sisters steady, nor yours unless you want to take the chance hell cheat on you. He can however still be your friend with benefits as long as no feelings are attached you'll have freed your sister of a cheating man and have gained a FWB

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      • RoseIsabella

        Don't do it. Be a decent person, and tell him to fuck off, and leave you the Hell alone! Don't be a stupid, selfish cunt-skank-whore! Your sister's are infinitely more important than your stupid feelings!

        Her husband is giant piece of shit. Tell him to leave you alone! It's not rocket science to know right from wrong.

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      • JonathanOo

        You let it get this far so you have 2 options now. Do what you want with him and deal with the negative consequences (he clearly really wants you) or cut him off completely. Let him know YOU don't want to do anything more and if he tried you'll tell your sister. Completely block him and make it clear you're off limits and his wife should be the only one for him unless they both want to be free to intetact with others

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  • MR.mr

    tell your sister

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  • Scarlettx87

    There are millions of men out there... equally attractive and equally full of shit. He doesn't love you, it's a lust because of how dangerous it could be , he shouldn't have you and that's why it's so appealing, same for you, why are you giving this guy the time of day, surely anyone that is ok breaking your sisters heart isn't enough for you. Think about it realistically what the best outcome that can come from this??.. either way someone is going to get hurt probably your poor sister who you may love but are having absolutely no respect for. Doesn't she deserve better from you??? Never mind from the creep. Cut all contact apart from when he's with your sister and go out and find your own guy because if you can on on this path, you await a life long guilt that will never go away, you will. Break a relationship ( probably needs ending anyway if he's such a douchebag) you will break your sister and her trust for many years if not her whole life. Your parents will be ashamed of you and all family friends etc will think your a unloyal slut who counts sex more important than family. This happens all the time but there's no happy ending to this. You wrote here because you know it's wrong, listen to that gut feeling and make a choice now before it goes any further. He's not worth it I promise you

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  • Shish999

    Nothing wrong.. give him a chance. I am sure nothing worse will happen. My Younger sister did it with my brother in law (no one know other than me). And I too did it with one of my cousins. We are not just the two who did like this. But think is he really metured to keep to secret. I have seen many ppl having these kinda relationships and all are well educated and doing good.
    If you ask too many ppl about it thy amke you mad. Just go and enjoy,and never feel guilty about it

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  • RoseIsabella

    Tell your sister! Cut ties with him, and block him on all media. Your brother-in-law is a piece of shit!

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  • sallyjane1

    No.he is...

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    • MR.mr

      can you live with the consequences, that's what you should ask yourself

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  • Bipolarexspress

    Tell your sister!

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    • Shish999

      Telling her sister is not helpful. He would find someone else

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  • olbluballs

    ask him if he wanr's a threesome

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  • ChrissySnow

    So I'm really mixed up about this one. When I was growing up I lost most of my boyfriends to backstabbing friends that stole them from me. So when I got a chance, I had NO hesitation on giving a 'friend' a taste of their own medicine just before they got married. After I was married a few years, my husband got the hots for my younger sister. At first he just asked me questions like "did you two ever mess around?" NO, Don't be gross, she's my sister! Then they started flirting. At first I was alarmed. NORMAL Right? but then later I started getting turned on thinking about it!?

    I didn't mean to but I found myself bragging about my husband to my sister more, and visa versa. How does a good wife tell her sister and her husband it is REALLY ok with her for them to cheat together? I was REALLY mixed up in my head. The more things heated up between them, the more scarce I made myself and stayed busy turning a blind eye.

    I wasn't REALLY unaware. They just THOUGHT I was. I can't explain why, but I was INCREDIBLY PROUD of my husband and happy for my sister. While they were having their affair my husband was the BEST husband EVER! I remember feeling that if this was what it was like to have a cheating husband than I was happy for him to cheat for the rest of our lives.

    When it ended, it ended by my sister confronting me and telling me all the horrible things they did. She was VERY determined to talk me into divorcing my husband. She wanted me to choose family over marriage. I told her I couldn't believe everything she said. I'd have to think about things. The truth was ugly. I didn't like having everything thrown in my face like that. I didn't leave him. We are still together. My sister an I don't talk much and we never shared like we used to before all that happened.

    I think it is normal for husbands to be attracted to other women. I think you and your sister's husband have taken it past normal. I'm not one to judge. I'm just asking, NOT to ever make it an UGLY family OUT IN THE OPEN subject.

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  • Justmehere

    He's definitely working on you to be his "on the side" action. Or, just being flirty. Several years ago, I went to a football game with my then-married (to a slimeball dentist) sister and my hot older sister, who wore tight jeans that made her ass look even more amazing than usual.

    We'd hit a tailgate party for a few and were relaxed, and slimeball dentist grabbed hot sister's ass. First time was fun, joking, oh you're so bad, but, as we made our way into the stadium, he did it 2-3 more times, annoying her and pissing off his wife. Can only chalk so many times up to being buzzed. I knew he was after more.

    Few weeks later, we're at a gathering at their house, and, sure enough, he's at it again. They had a finished basement with a small bar, and hot sister was behind it, getting glasses for upstairs (I was watching tv down there until dinner). He blocked her way out, same as before..first joking around and poking/tickling her, then, closing in on her.

    She laughed it off and wiggled around him, but, I did hear her telling his wife the "fun or not, he better keep his hands off me..enough's enough" she said, in a serious tone (odd for her, as she usually took these things in stride and let them pass). Knowing he was caught, but thinking I'd play the "guy role", he actually told me "I'd love to fuck Denise".

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  • Nastynate

    Threesome if you wanna keep some

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  • Lillygir1

    Eye for an eye. He's hitting on you so you hit on him. But with a frying pan. Bwahahaha

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    • yasss

      sounds like the best thing to do in the situation :')

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  • justlooking1976

    You fuck him! Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with people these days! He has a hard dick and you have a wet pussy. Figure it out already.

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  • sallyjane1

    She loves him so much but I don't know. I dare not ask and it is getting near to the point that its fair to ask...would I share him?

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  • Ratmanwakes

    You sound like you want to give him some. So, very simple: Give him some! Then tell your sister about it. In lurid detail. Especially if he does something wacky, like suck your toes, or sniff your butt whole. She's sure to get grossed out and pissed and leave the guy. Then you'll have him all to yourself! I wouldn't expect any Christmas cards from sis anytime soon, but you can't have everything. Good luck!

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  • Nickvey

    you are either going to fuckhim or you are not. its never the guys call never the guys fault. i bet you do fucki him. you just cant help yourself

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  • Be_humane

    Tell your Sis and Mom about it.Take control of situations.don't let him do whatever he wants.you have a life of your own.be protected and tell him to behave.Don't talk to him casually or leave any hints that make him feel you are ok with it and understand you have a beautiful life waiting for you somewhen better than this.so no matter what anyone says you deserve what you seek and not others
    All the best

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  • DOT86

    Intresting I had a sister in law that was super attractive (my first wife) they would come over on the weekends and drink, I'd be out and about with my friends when I'd get home they'd be tipsy by then. (They were horrible drinkers) so one night I was dancing with her and I got hard she kept trying to feel my erection on her. This went on for months till one day she made her move and well we carried that on for a few years, me and my wife divorced but those times with her were filled with excitement. I know now because she was that "forbidden fruit" be careful your sister will get hurt.

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  • EchoMaster

    You'll end up with no sister and he'll do it to you. Dude sounds like a scumbag. Your sister should get away from him.

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  • bimbobamboo

    if you think hes hot , have sex, otherwise, give him shit

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  • bro1

    If you care at all about your family, you probably shouldn't. Think if that was your dad fucking your mum's sister? Like dude, you're fucked up. I hope your sister finds out and leaves him and you FUCKING LEARN TO GET SOME KIND OF CONTROL OVER YOUR SEXUAL INSTINCTS LIKE DUDE, WE'RE NOT ANIMALS ANYMORE,WE HAVE DEVELOPED A BRAIN, YOU CAN GO FUCK SOMEONE ELSE IF YOU WANT A FUCK. You only want to fuck him because you know it would be wrong but hey, if you want to destroy your sisters life and his and yours. GO FOR IT GIRL!!! GIRL POWER, all of your advice is horrible and selfish.

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  • BeMe4AWhile

    You should tell your sister everything that has transpired. She'll be mad at both of you but she does have a right to know.

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  • Tell your sis, she will be mad at him AND you if she would find out he cheated on her with you, so just tell her, and see what happens next.

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  • Alcervix2017

    Perv

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  • Paws

    If you love your sister you will back off. You don't need to tell her or anything, but if you have any kind of morals, you tell him to leave you alone or you will tell her about it. Of course it is your decision but cheaters rarely deserve respect.

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  • nina37

    Really close. I know what I said in my last post, I was upset, but in reality I could never take him off her. we share so much, but I couldn't ask that of her.

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