My male best friend and our relationship

Ok so boom, my best friend and I have been very close for over a year now, he’s a guy I’m a female. We share a bed sometimes, spend the night together. He treats me with so much respect and he cares about me a lot. Sometimes w heave fought and whenever we did he would literally come looking for me when I ignored him and tell me he wants us to communicate he doesn’t want us to fight. He holds me when I’m upset. He cuddles me when I can’t sleep. He’s there when I cry. He never likes any of the guys that give me attention or like me. He encourages me everyday while I’m on my weight loss journey. Sometimes I spend every night with him and we would get food together watch a movie cuddle play video games. Other days we just try to talk about how we feel about certain things. We open up to each other more and more. When we became friends for a year we decided to celebrate and he bought me one of those rose bears online. This immediately made my friends think that he likes me or we are in a relationship. I have liked him in the past but he never liked me that way and always told me that he only likes me as a friend, nothing more. He said I’m not his type. My friends accuse him of lying and think that there’s some reason to why he is. (Idk) they think our friendship is unhealthy and way too close to be a friendship and that it should just be a relationship what do you think?

It’s normal for a female/male friendship 16
Not normal, you guys sound like a couple 22
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Comments ( 36 )
  • RoseIsabella

    He would probably really like for ya'll to be a couple.

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    • No he’s made it very clear that he doesn’t.

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      • RoseIsabella

        Well, then just enjoy, and appreciate your friend as he is.

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      • litelander8

        Why would he if he already gets what he wants? He can lean on you emotionally and have a warm body to curl up on without the strings. Whilst, I'm sure, he's out being physical with other women with no strings. Smart dude.

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        • I’m actually the only girl he’s been with...especially since we are together nearly 24/7.....so I would know if he was ever physical with someone else.

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  • CoffeeTime

    Friends don't cuddle in bed, do they? He's a liar.

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  • curious-bunny

    Nah your probably ok. Guys and girls vs. Be friends with no strings it happens all the time!

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  • bigbudchonga

    No offence, but how big are you? Maybe if you lose some weight you'll become "his type".

    It sounds like he certainly has feelings for you. Also has he had a girlfriend before, or been romantically involved with another girl. If he's really effeminate then maybe he's gay.

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    • Well from the way we go at it I don’t think he’s gay!! And I’m not huge but I definitely need to lose weight I’m about 230 pounds last time I weighed. He’s never had a girlfriend before.

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      • bigbudchonga

        Good luck with the weight loss. My mum feels a lot happier now she's lost weight. (I'm hoping to too!)

        Do you think he could be just shy about asking you out? Also how old are you? I remember from school days that relationships didn't last very long.

        You could ask him if he thinks of you romantically, or something like that.

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        • I’ll be 20 in the summer, I really don’t get that he does. But maybe next year things will change.

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          • bigbudchonga

            Have you thought about asking him out? I'm not gunna lie, there's a chance of rejection, and the rejection is not a pleasant feeling, but if you bucked up and did it then it could end really well for you.

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            • I have and got rejected. He said he loves me as a friend and likes our friendship but doesn’t like me in that way. Nobody believes him. I hardly do.

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  • Mark92

    Its perfectly normal, male or female we are all humans. You are probably young, when you join work force you will have to work with a large no. of coworkers of opposite gender. While I am not fond of some, most of them I am ok with and am close to a large no of female co workers , we have lunch together, we go out and stuffs but they are happily married, its perfectly normal. We dont see each other any differently just because we are of opposite gender. Being friends with the opposite gender and being romantically linked are totally different. In my student life I had a large no of female and male friends, it was a large group and had my girl friend with whom my relation was way different, but i treated my female friends no differently than my male friends. Dont let others judge your relation with your friend. Its up to you to to decide and know whether you two are just friends or something more, and there is nothing wrong with either.

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  • Ummitsstillme

    Not normal. Make a point

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    • Wym make a point. Did I not just type a whole paragraph explaining the situation?

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  • imaz

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  • IrishPotato

    Just don't do that shit if you start dating someone though. That's fucking cheating.

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    • Obviously

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      • IrishPotato

        Awesome. At least you have a close friend, so that's good.

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  • Mrown

    This guy is totally up to something. He's either lying about not being attracted to you or he's gay. I don't know your "friend" so I can't tell why he would lie about that. Maybe you two should have a serious talk about it.

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  • Cocogravybuns2

    He doesn't like other guys by you... I say he digs you. I'm a guy and do the same thing. Kiss him.

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    • I’ve been there, have done more than that. Still nothing right now.

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  • Read half of your post... He is definitely GAY

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    • Mark92

      The post clearly mentions he "doesnt like any other guys who pays her attention", nor other girls as evident from OP's comment. There is nothing to suggest he is gay at all, they are just good friends and its perfectly normal. But I must say i didnt pay attention to the full post earlier, if they are even sharing beds "at night", well they are a bit to close to be just friends. But its perfectly fine either ways, they will figure out themselves whether they are just friends or more, and like I said before there is nothing wrong with either and I wish them all the best.

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      • I appreciate you!

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      • quote myself "Read half of your post"

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    • Bingo. It's so obvious.

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  • SwickDinging

    After all that it was the little bear that made people think he likes you? Lol.

    He is essentially your boyfriend already from what you've said here. It's kind of weird that he's said he doesn't like you that way when he so very clearly does. Sounds like he's madly in love with you and isn't afraid to show it.

    I'm not sure why he wouldn't just be honest about it... That's a weird one. Maybe some of the men on this site could give some insight? There must be some reason why he can't/won't tell you his true feelings.

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    • leggs91200

      maybe she is friends with megadriver. We all know he is too busy whacking off to his cars to be in an intimate relationship with, well, anyone

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    • Sometimes I have to remind myself that he’s not my boyfriend. But he has no interested in me. As a girl I just know. But sometimes I do feel like he’s hiding it...or hiding how he really feels for some reason. Maybe some day it’ll come out. Maybe it will be once I’m smaller.

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      • SwickDinging

        Are you very overweight? I suppose it could be that. I'm not sure how I'd feel about a guy waiting around for me to lose weight before he asked me out, but it's up to you.

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        • I’m 230 pounds? In my opinion I don’t look that heavy but everyone sees people differently

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          • SwickDinging

            230 pounds sounds like a lot to me but then I don't know your build. Regardless, it shouldn't matter anyway as you sound very comfortable in your own skin which is all that matters. If he is waiting for you to lose weight then that's pretty weird. It could be something else though.

            The thing is, while he's having a "not" relationship with you it's stopping you from meeting someone you could have a real relationship with. Maybe you don't mind but I'd want to be going out and meeting people and feel free to persue someone if I was interested in them. I bet he'd be insanely jealous if you met someone...

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