My girlfriend hates that im fat..

She met me this way, says she loves me but her dream man is not a 288lb 5”11” guy. Its been 3 years and she says only reason she doesn’t leave me is because Im a good man, I’ve tried dieting without success (it’s my fault) but finally Im being serious about it.

Should I stay with someone that will love me 100% if I fill that condition or should I just leave and find another person?

Im not saying being fat should be ok, I should be healthier but acceptance should be also important if she met me and dragged me along for 3 years.

Be brutal with me and honest!
Specially you Females need your opinion

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Comments ( 19 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • Ditch her. She's out for herself. Then ditch the weight and you'll feel like a whole new man.

    It's one thing for her to worry about your health - my husband is over weight and I do worry about this. I don't want me and the kids to lose him earlier than we have to. But this woman is trying to change you into "her dream man"? And she "only" stays because you're a good man? Sounds like she expects you to be grateful and thinks she's better than you. Fuck her. You can do better.

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    • I agree.

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    • Wouldnt she be lying tho if she said hes a big sexy teddybear? I feel like shes doing the exact same thing you are. Staying with him because she loves him. Lets be honest you dont stay with your man because hes a sexy beast either.

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  • I was in a similar boat as your gf. I had a bf with similar height and weight to you and i honestly didn't find him physically attractive at all. It was to the point where I was hesitant to ever have children with him. Not to mention he had severe depression and was a neet. I felt guilty about it but that was that.

    I think you should find someone else. someone who will love all of you and support you.

    sorry i dont have much to say

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    • Is there a specific reason as to why if you dint liked your ex, you dated him in the first place?

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      • I met him online first. I didn't know what he looked like right away, so at first it was entirely an emotional connection. Things got going very quickly and I saw how he looked, but I thought I didn't care about his looks.
        I was inexperienced and immature; I was 18 at the time. I went into it without thinking much about long term.
        I was with him for about 2 years. I liked his companionship and he liked me but it wouldn't have become marriage...

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  • I’m a female so here’s my opinion...

    If this was the other way around, everyone would be calling the guy an asshole for not loving the female for how she is and bla bla bla.

    You should do what’s best FOR YOU. Breakup with her and find someone who’s gonna love you for YOU.

    And Yes, get into a more healthy weight. Work out, exercise, etc. She will be wanting you back. And you’ll get a new girl who will like you for you and accept you. And not a girl who only likes you for your looks, a girl who wants you to change. She literally said she was only with you because your a good man. There should be other reasons too, but there isn’t. Leave her and focus on yourself

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  • I don't it's anyone's dream to be with someone who is almost 300 pounds.

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  • Shes being honest about it. If it's that single issue, got to tough up and start dieting.

    Perhaps start a fasting diet. Eat whatever you want within an 8 hour period. I should say eat until you are full not depression full. And for the next 16 hours don't eat anything besides water or paleo broth (because it wont contain 30% of your daily value of sodium per cup)

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  • If you're hanging out for someone to love you 100% for ever and ever, you're going to be disappointed.

    She sounds very tactless: if she loves you, why is she telling you her dream man is someone quite different to you physically? That sounds very immature to me.

    You acknowledge your weight isn't healthy: you can do something about that and I suggest you do it while you're young because it gets harder and harder as you get older, but do it for yourself, not because she's being a pain in the arse about it.

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  • Hi! Woman here! I personally like my men a little husky, makes me feel secure and honestly its attractive to me (after a long history of dating lanky guys) I kinda agree with her, shes trying to encourage you to be healthier but at the same time she could be a little supportive about it.

    If shes being toxic in any sense or making you feel like shit then tell her, maybe ask her to come to the gym with you or workout together🤷🏼‍♀️

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  • That means she loves you for you not your body. You found a good girl that will overlook your terrible behavior, but she won't lie to you and tell you it's ok. Dude get in shape. Being fat isnt her fault and it's especially bad because you can fix it and you should. You dont deserve a pat on the back bro its not ok to continue that. You can do it. Eat once a day if you have to.

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  • She should be encouraging you to lose the fat.

    If this was me, I would personally use the hate to begin to better myself.

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  • Get your fat ass off the couch and start a diet

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  • For me personally I would want to be in a relationship with someone who takes care of themselves its not unreasonable for that to be a defining deal breaker. At least shes honest about her feelings and wants to stay with you if you make positive changes in your life. That's what support can look like in difficult situations. Sounds like you should stick with her and work on losing weight for the benefit of your health confidence and relationship

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  • you dropped this 👑

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  • So this is basically one of those "love you for your personality" relationships? Plenty of those exist. Since it's not your thing, perhaps you should leave her?

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