My family think it's creepy that i'm dating a younger man?

He's 22, I'm 30

They flipped out when they found out how old he is and keep saying I'm dating a child, I'm creepy, it's pervy etc

But I truly love him and we are so happy together.

It makes me feel disgusted with myself and makes me constantly question if I'm a psycho.

He's highly mature, looks older than his age and I never notice the age difference

Is it normal that my parents find this creepy?

Voting Results
27% Normal
Based on 37 votes (10 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 29 )
  • Resurgam53

    If you’re 30, your parents should not be interfering! Do what you want!

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • leggs91200

    Hats off to that man for scoring an older lady!

    But honestly, you are 30. Your parents have no say in how you live your life.

    You are both over 21 so you two have to decide. No, it is not creepy or any of that shit. Damn when I was 20, I dated a 37 y/o woman.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Sad18yo

      37!!! Ick, I’m almost 20 and I couldn’t imagine that. But I guess if you’re of age and love each other that’s all that matters.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
    • Lol, thank you for that it made me feel better!

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • raisinbran

    Do what you want.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • libertybell

    22 and 30 is hardly an age difference. I wouldn't worry about it.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Sad18yo

      8 years is a lot of time....

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • donteatstuffoffthesidewalk

    'highly mature'

    does he throw his cane at the television durin the evenin news?

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • leggs91200

      When his arthritis doesn't start bothering his shoulder.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
    • Boojum

      Highly mature would be chucking his false teeth at the OP when she annoys him.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Boojum

    By no sane definition is a twenty-two-year-old person a child.

    Your family should get their noses out of your life. If they respected you, they'd let you make your own decisions about who you spend your time with and who you develop emotional attachments to. The only time a truly loving family member should express an opinion about a relationship you were in would be if they believed it was harming you.

    I wonder how your family would have reacted if you were a thirty-year-old man with a twenty-two-year-old girlfriend. I'd be willing to make a small wager that they'd be fine with that. If you believe they would be accepting of that arrangement, then you can be sure that your family has some pretty screwed-up ideas.

    You don't say who exactly in your family is upset, but I have to wonder if your mother or perhaps other older female relatives are most upset about this. If so, that would suggest jealousy is a significant part of what they're feeling.

    If it's older male relatives who are upset, then you could reasonably ask yourself if that perhaps suggests that they believe the natural order of things is for men to have younger girlfriends, and if that might mean they'd secretly like to have a much younger woman as their girlfriend.

    The bottom line is that your relative's opinions should matter to you far, far less than how well you get along with someone, no matter what your ages are. Your family is not living your life; you are. If your family truly loved you, they wouldn't be slapping vile labels on you and trying to make you feel bad about yourself and disrespecting your boyfriend by calling him a child. Instead, they would be happy that you are happy to be with the man and they'd be welcoming and supportive.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • libertybell

    My bf's also 22, and I'm 48! I 😍 him, he's awesome!

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Satinstar

    It's not weird and it isnt that uncommon.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Thanks! I don't even notice an age difference with him either

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • RoseIsabella

    Nope, it doesn't sound creepy to me.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Sleepykitten

    Big age gaps are gross but you're passing the "half your age plus seven" rule anyway. I'm 30 and I don't think I'd ever date a 22 year old but a lot of that is because I don't think there are a lot of 22 year olds at the same life stage I'm at. I got an early start on my career so I own my own house in a quiet area, have a highly paid job, a bunch of pets etc. It would be weird for me to date someone just graduating college, or living at home, or just starting a career etc... regardless of age. If I somehow was single again and met a 22 year old who I clicked with and was in the same life stage, I don't see why not.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Ah right, thanks for your input! I understand your reasons. We are actually both at the exact stage in terms of career, what we're looking for etc. We both have a decent career and live in our own apartments so that's good

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • GaelicPotato

    Fuck your family. Be with who makes you happy.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • TerriAngel

    Once your both above 18.
    Age gaps do not matter so much.
    8 years isnt much as adults.
    As for being in different phases of life.
    I dont think so, since not everyone is in the same phase, based on age.
    Some marry, or start having kids at 18.
    Some wait till they have a carear, house etc. They dont start a family till they are in their 30s.
    People dont age or have maturity at the same level.
    Havent we all seen responcible kids 18 years old.
    VS crackhead bums in their 40s.
    Whos more ' mature '
    If youre happy, ride it out.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • randomperson1000000

    I'm a firm believe in "live and let live," but at the very least, if it's not statutory rape, then there should be considered nothing wrong with it.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • palehorse

    The age gap is weird, and concerning in some ways, since a 22 and a 30 year old are in very different stages of life. However, not all age-gap relationships are automatically predatory / abusive / etc. Use your judgement. If your relationship is truly healthy, your family will see that in time. But I don't think their worries are unfounded.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Thanks for the input, I don't feel we're in different stages. We both have a job and live in our own apartments

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • palehorse

        That seems fair. You are both consenting adults after all; I'm sure your family will come around. Have a nice day!

        Comment Hidden ( show )
  • cupcake_wants

    I dated a 21 year old when I was 30. It didn't work out, he was immature. He just wanted to party.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Sorry to hear that. Luckily my guy is the nerdy introvert type.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • cupcake_wants

        that's OK. He was more of a boy toy at the time though.

        Comment Hidden ( show )
  • d0esnormalmatter

    Yes most parents would find that pretty suspect. 8 year younger guy is a lot and women date younger even less than guys date younger women.

    Your relationship sounds fine though so I wouldn't change anything but do understand that that age gap with a younger guy is really weird and rare.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Thanks, I didn't want to fall in love with a younger man but I couldn't help it with him as he's everything I could ever want and need in a partner

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • d0esnormalmatter

        Sounds great!

        Comment Hidden ( show )