My family is sooo disfunctional!!!

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15 Comments

My parents got a divorce when i was 5, which is probably a good thing!The s.w.a.t. team was called to the house because my drunk dad had a gun to my mom's head and i remember a sheriff rescuing me and my sister from the bedroom window.We moved in with my grandmother.(mom's mom) til she started dating my now step-father.My mom went from a "christian",mother to a neglagent meth-head parent.My oldest brother ended up in foster homes and my sister and i had to stay with friends after my mom went to jail for writing hot checks.when i was 16 i had 1,500 saved up for a car, but used it to get an apartment with my mom away from my abusive step dad because my mom's reason for not leaving him was because she had no money.3 months later, she moves him in with us.She used to give me meth everyday from ages 15-18.Now that she's clean she just expects me to forgive her and to "quit bringing up the past" i want to have a normal relationship with her, but i fucking hate her and i just can't get over all the shit she's put me through!!i don't know what to do..i'm 25 and she's still with my step-dad!!!she still chooses him over us!!!

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  • [email protected]
    11 years ago | pl

    Good luck to you in the future.

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago | pl

    And to the person who submitted, you are a strong individual who has the courage and the power to move on with your life. You can do it! Life it going to throw stuff at you but you gotta learn to take it and turn it into something spectacular for yourself, so you can live a healthy life. You can do it :)

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago | pl

    Label1877 I'm so glad ur not my parent u idiot. The children always come first ALWAYS what a selfish thing to say . They come from you and even if they don't your their role model, you chose to take them in. Your kids should mean more than life itself to you. the poor girl and her sibling should have come first not tossed around from home to home like luggage.

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  • karma_is_bs
    13 years ago | pl

    I plan on moving far away as soon as I get the chance, but the way my work is going, it might take longer than expected...then again..just because I live in the same city doesn't mean I have to allow them into my life.

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  • awelstoo
    13 years ago | pl

    also move interstate or overseas before your 'family' ruins you.

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  • karma_is_bs
    13 years ago | pl

    yes shit DOES happen.and i've been completly independent since i was 17 years old.it's backfired many times dude..trust me...i distance myself from her quite a bit.i don't go to there "family" funtions anymore because i don't like pretending in front of everyone else that we have such a wonderful relationship.As soon as the fuckin christmas tree goes down, we're back at each other's throats!!!i just avoid getting too close to her and limit my communication with her...i think it will be much better once i move out of town.much easier anyway..

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  • iHatemF
    13 years ago | pl

    Shit happens man, and it apparently happens in your life. You're 25 years old, more than old enough to get a job and be independent. If you can't take this anymore it's time to GO, all I see from this situation is that it's giving you loads of stress. You and your mother can try working it out in a conversation but if that backfires...it might be best to go.

    Good luck

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  • label1877
    13 years ago | pl

    A spouse SHOULD always chose their spouse over their children. Remember, a child is a temporary visitor.

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    • karma_is_bs
      13 years ago | pl

      a "temporary visitor" that they decided to fucking make you faggot!!!he's not my fucking father and never will be!!but maybe she deserves a cheating, worthless, non working,mooch like him.when she gets too old to work and needs help,i won't be there for her.and with your attitude, i'm sure your kids won't be there for you either...dumbass

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    • awelstoo
      13 years ago | pl

      wow you are a total cunt :/

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    • ComboBreaker
      13 years ago | pl

      Thats the worst thing you could posibly say!
      Her step dads an abusive fuck and her ex meth mum chooses him over her daughter that seems to have made sacrifyses for her!

      Kids come first and always do come first. Anyone that thinks other wise dose NOT deserve to have kids!

      OP, you've lived a very neglectful childhood filled with iresponibility and violence. The best thing I could sugest Is to stick close to your siblings. You all went through it and understand fully how you each feel. Comfort each other if you feel it nessecery. You're old enough to escape from it all now, but if you have other siblings under your mums or stepdads care. You should get them out of there for their own protection.

      It would be understandable to not want to see your mum at all. It seems you have unconditional love towards her though. Life would be alot easyer without this, but it's not easly discarded. Do you see a therapist or counsler? They may be helpful when comeing to tough desitions you are faceing. The choice your mother has made though, is her own. You may not be able to change it. Can you honestly say that you diddnt expect it? If you dont already, keep close to your siblings and seek a counsler. You're bound to have a few confusions in your situation, it's normal. Good luck.

      BTW Since your brother was isolated from you, your sister and parents. Im sure he feels like a stranger, unwanted, lonely... make sure he's ok, please. If you havent already.

      Not normal and far from it. No one should have a child hood experiance like that.

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      • karma_is_bs
        13 years ago | pl

        thank you for your time combobreaker.i am the youngest sibling and i am very close with all of them.My oldest brother is in florida in the airforce and is doing just fine.i talk to him often.my sister lives just a few blocks away, but i'm not as close with her as i used to be as she tends to take sides with my mother and lets my mother run her whole life!!i've never seen a counsilor or anything.this site is like my therapy and my friends are also therapy.i don't feel as worthless as i did growing up.i have more confidence in myself at this point in my life..

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  • mermaid
    13 years ago | pl

    Stuff happens.
    In a similar mom-hating situation, I just cut off all contact with her. She will still not admit to being insane or abusing me... but after time, I can still kind of talk to her and have a somewhat friendly relationship (though I still call her by her first name).
    You should try to be thankful that you made it through and try to keep moving on with your life.
    You can do it.

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    • karma_is_bs
      13 years ago | pl

      it just kind of makes me hate the people that had perfect little lifes you know...but maybe it's better to get a taste of reality at a younger age rather than realizing how fucked up the world really is later on in life after being hidden from all the uglyness and then just be nieve and hit with a ton of bricks later in life...jack nicholson said it best in As Good As It Gets..."it's not the fact that we had it so hard growing up.It's just that everyone else had it so much better."...somthing along those lines...

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    • karma_is_bs
      13 years ago | pl

      thank you for your time..i didn't even list the half of the shit i've been through, and i'm not trying to really look for sympathy because i know that there are alot of people that have had it much worse.in my own family as a matter of fact.My uncle raped all of his children and murdered his wife and got away with it.I'm acually looking for people in similar situations that have overcome this bullshit or just some kind of second opinion..it just feels good to know that you're not the only one you know..i've had an alcohol addiction for the past 5 years and i feel like i'm turning into my father!!!i've managed to cut back quite a bit though which is positive, but i want to quit completly!this is my therapy so thanks again for taking the time to comment on my story.Fuck paying for a phsycologist when there's sites like this!!!i do have dreams and goals in life and i am thankfull for making it this far in life without getting knocked up and repeating the cycle, or ending up a crack head, or in prison,ect....

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