While you're right they are consenting adults, you're ignoring the coercive pressure on the girls. Yeah, the men are like 'yay, score' but the girls are like 'eeew but ok'. There's a big power imbalance and even though it's not child to teacher/parent/ it's still fucking disgusting. They consent under extreme pressure ('far worse lives in their own country', your words), what are the men consenting to? Ownership of a beautiful young otherwise unobtainable woman? Oh big loss on his part. I agree with you that adults can do what they want but be real. It's more gross on one side, using a person's bad home life and good looks just to get off and gain a submissive partner? Eew.
Who is coercing the women to do it? They are from other countries, they live in other countries. Nobody is forcing them to create online profiles. Nobody is forcing them to marry these guys. Even if they request, they can say 'no'.
You can judge all you want, human beings are judgmental by nature. But they aren't doing anything wrong.
I'm not judging. I said they can do what they want but I also said it's pretty gross in one direction and I don't think you can refute that. I personally know a mail order bride, I understand what she did and why but the guy involved was absolutely disgusting and a loser basically but used his US citizenship as power as most do. I'm not fucking judging the politics involved, just addressing the power imbalance and desperation on one side and saying well, yeah, it is two consenting adults TECHNICALLY, there is an obvious power play here. Why can't the fat, middle aged, bald, mediocre income guy get a local girl? Uh because he has to buy one.
It's funny how you keep repeating you're not judging but most of the things you said are judgments. There is power play in most if not all relationships. There are lot of women involved with disgusting men and vice versa. Can't save them all.
I'm not judging the decision itself, I completely understand why they do it. I am merely commenting on the FACT that there is a power imbalance and a good lot of these women are also acting under the direction of essentially a pimp who profits from the deal. You're basically saying 'hey it's just two adults doing what they want' without looking beyond and examining why these people are doing this. As if their decisions are not prodded by anything whatsoever. Just because you are an adult doesn't mean you can't be limited in your choices. Starvation for family or marry a nasty poor American? No intimacy ever or buy a bride from overseas because you have that bit of leverage? If these guys are so great, why do they have to buy a woman? They for some reason NEED to or have to because they are either losers, control freaks or both or fethishisers. You seem to think all mail order husbands are rich. Nope. The one I know didn't even have running water in his house.
Again, you see, you keep saying nasty things about those guys, which is judging them, and then keep saying you are not judging. Like I said, there is power dynamics in all relationships.
So you say those women are starving? And if they find a groom they won't starve. And you're saying that's a bad thing? That those women should die? You're not even making any sense.
Look, this is going nowhere. And I have better things to do. So either you start making some sense or you do not deserve a reply.
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While you're right they are consenting adults, you're ignoring the coercive pressure on the girls. Yeah, the men are like 'yay, score' but the girls are like 'eeew but ok'. There's a big power imbalance and even though it's not child to teacher/parent/ it's still fucking disgusting. They consent under extreme pressure ('far worse lives in their own country', your words), what are the men consenting to? Ownership of a beautiful young otherwise unobtainable woman? Oh big loss on his part. I agree with you that adults can do what they want but be real. It's more gross on one side, using a person's bad home life and good looks just to get off and gain a submissive partner? Eew.
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Max2016
7 years ago
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Who is coercing the women to do it? They are from other countries, they live in other countries. Nobody is forcing them to create online profiles. Nobody is forcing them to marry these guys. Even if they request, they can say 'no'.
You can judge all you want, human beings are judgmental by nature. But they aren't doing anything wrong.
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wigz
7 years ago
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I'm not judging. I said they can do what they want but I also said it's pretty gross in one direction and I don't think you can refute that. I personally know a mail order bride, I understand what she did and why but the guy involved was absolutely disgusting and a loser basically but used his US citizenship as power as most do. I'm not fucking judging the politics involved, just addressing the power imbalance and desperation on one side and saying well, yeah, it is two consenting adults TECHNICALLY, there is an obvious power play here. Why can't the fat, middle aged, bald, mediocre income guy get a local girl? Uh because he has to buy one.
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Max2016
7 years ago
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It's funny how you keep repeating you're not judging but most of the things you said are judgments. There is power play in most if not all relationships. There are lot of women involved with disgusting men and vice versa. Can't save them all.
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wigz
7 years ago
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I'm not judging the decision itself, I completely understand why they do it. I am merely commenting on the FACT that there is a power imbalance and a good lot of these women are also acting under the direction of essentially a pimp who profits from the deal. You're basically saying 'hey it's just two adults doing what they want' without looking beyond and examining why these people are doing this. As if their decisions are not prodded by anything whatsoever. Just because you are an adult doesn't mean you can't be limited in your choices. Starvation for family or marry a nasty poor American? No intimacy ever or buy a bride from overseas because you have that bit of leverage? If these guys are so great, why do they have to buy a woman? They for some reason NEED to or have to because they are either losers, control freaks or both or fethishisers. You seem to think all mail order husbands are rich. Nope. The one I know didn't even have running water in his house.
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Max2016
7 years ago
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Again, you see, you keep saying nasty things about those guys, which is judging them, and then keep saying you are not judging. Like I said, there is power dynamics in all relationships.
So you say those women are starving? And if they find a groom they won't starve. And you're saying that's a bad thing? That those women should die? You're not even making any sense.
Look, this is going nowhere. And I have better things to do. So either you start making some sense or you do not deserve a reply.