I've done this before... When I did it had already crossed my mind consciously that something fishy was going on and having the dream made it that much worse. If I were you, I wouldn't blow it off as "just a dream". Those insecurities are based on something real and if you want a healthy relationship you should both be open to figuring out what it is.
Though it seems to me that if her insecurities are unfounded, or things he may be completly unaware of, that maybe she is the one that needs to communicate them. He can't read her mind. Her just expecting him to read her mind and give short answers like "you know" when he does try to discuss it isn't really helpful.
If she has concerns beyond the dream, he is recognizing that she is upset, asking her what is wrong, and all she is giving back is "you know", then he is not the person with the communication issue.
Similar to his response, what he actually said in the post was that he tried to discuss it, and tried to be patient and understanding. But after getting nothing back from her he eventually got frustrated by her lack of communication and gave up. That seems logical to me. He can't force her to be honest with him. Would you have him pester her about it till the end of time?
There are two sides to every story and we are only hearing one. There could be other facts. But based on what has been presented here, if she was upset, he tried to be understanding and discover what is upsetting her, and she was giving nothing back, then he is not the one with the cocommunication problem. Communication only works as a two way street. If she is not going to participate, obviously he is going to give up at some point.
I'm not, I never do, all I've done all day is try to act the same as I normally do, I've been trying to make conversation, asked if she's okay and asked to talk about what happened but she refuses to, this is a one way communication break down
If she's a rational person, reassuring her shouldn't be too difficult. Just have a mature conversation with her about why she's feeling the way she's feeling. Trust doesn't come as easily to some people.
Plus dreams are weird, it could be your general attitude toward other women, she could be feeling like you're not giving her enough strength or something completely different that set off her insecurities.
mad at me because of what I did in her dream?!
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I've done this before... When I did it had already crossed my mind consciously that something fishy was going on and having the dream made it that much worse. If I were you, I wouldn't blow it off as "just a dream". Those insecurities are based on something real and if you want a healthy relationship you should both be open to figuring out what it is.
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VinnyB
8 years ago
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Anonymous Post Author
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Though it seems to me that if her insecurities are unfounded, or things he may be completly unaware of, that maybe she is the one that needs to communicate them. He can't read her mind. Her just expecting him to read her mind and give short answers like "you know" when he does try to discuss it isn't really helpful.
If she has concerns beyond the dream, he is recognizing that she is upset, asking her what is wrong, and all she is giving back is "you know", then he is not the person with the communication issue.
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Freedom_
8 years ago
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They both have communication issues. She gives short, obscure answers and he is giving her the cold shoulder.
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VinnyB
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Ellenna
8 years ago
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Similar to his response, what he actually said in the post was that he tried to discuss it, and tried to be patient and understanding. But after getting nothing back from her he eventually got frustrated by her lack of communication and gave up. That seems logical to me. He can't force her to be honest with him. Would you have him pester her about it till the end of time?
There are two sides to every story and we are only hearing one. There could be other facts. But based on what has been presented here, if she was upset, he tried to be understanding and discover what is upsetting her, and she was giving nothing back, then he is not the one with the cocommunication problem. Communication only works as a two way street. If she is not going to participate, obviously he is going to give up at some point.
I'm not, I never do, all I've done all day is try to act the same as I normally do, I've been trying to make conversation, asked if she's okay and asked to talk about what happened but she refuses to, this is a one way communication break down
Read the post again: he says he's being cold shouldered BY HER
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Freedom_
8 years ago
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Ah, I see. I misinterpreted that.
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Ellenna
8 years ago
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It happens a lot on here and sometimes I even do it myself!
I think it's down to a lack of trust, which upsets me more than anything else
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Freedom_
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Freedom_
8 years ago
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If she's a rational person, reassuring her shouldn't be too difficult. Just have a mature conversation with her about why she's feeling the way she's feeling. Trust doesn't come as easily to some people.
Plus dreams are weird, it could be your general attitude toward other women, she could be feeling like you're not giving her enough strength or something completely different that set off her insecurities.
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Freedom_
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Strenght= attention*
Wth, stupid phone lol