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Do you think it is possible to be selfless or having a self-conscious sense of superiority or virtuosity still enough to make those that seem selfless actually have a stint of selfishness? Any additional thoughts are welcome.
| Yes | 62 | |
| No | 69 |
Everything is motivated by self interest.
The only difference between the man who gives to charity and the one who doesn't is that one of them got a sense of satisfaction (selfish) from giving while the other feels nothing for it.
No. Selflessness is illogical. The one point of life (not just human life, but all life) is to pass on genes. To do this two basic things are required, survival and reproduction. Humans are pack animals and so are meant to help eachother survive and so gain mutual benefit. Thus humans have evolved to feel good when they do good things for others.
If you think deeper, there's actually no such thing as a selfless act. Even if it appears to be 'for others' at first, ultimately it will benefit you in some way.
I've done many things for other people that have not benefitted me in any way whatsoever. In fact, sometimes I look back and get angry with myself for being taken advantage of. A friend almost destroyed me when she said, "Before you do someone a favour ask yourself 'would they do it for me?' If the answer is 'no' then don't do it for them." Aaarrrrggggggggghhhhhhh!!!! I came to a stop!!
I couldn't live like that so had to stop asking it of myself.
Have you seen the film "Pay it Forward"? It's a way to change the world. I loved it.
I am also a mother and wonder what you think I was going to gain out of this .....
When I was 8 months pregnant I spent a month in hospital with complications. The hospital wanted to scan me for a blood clot by injecting radio-active solution into my foot, and then x-raying me. When I asked about the baby, they said they would TRY to protect it with a lead blanket.
TRY!!??? Oh no you won't!!! My child was not going to receive anything radio-active, nor would he be x-rayed in case I lost him, but the risk was that I would die. To me that was better than losing my son. I made my husband promise to look after him should I die, and I refused treatment. He was premature and his lungs hadn't developed but we both lived, i let them scan me after the birth and yes I'd a clot in my leg.
You did it so YOUR baby wouldn't get hurt because YOU didn't want him to.
I don't understand how every1 cant see that somewhere in there, there is an element of self however small.
That is not bad thing its just a fact we do nice things cose it benefits the world and our well being.
Buddhists call it Karma
timebobbu:
But that's not a bad thing though. Selfish doesn't necessarily mean you only think of yourself at all times; it just means that everything in life goes back to some kind of internal desire of your own.
That desire could be the satisfaction you get from defending others, giving to charity or saving someone from death.
Oh Poppycock! That was for PandaShifter. And so is this:
Have you ever even been a parent? Do you know what having a three-year old little boy in the 11th grade is like? And then listening to your friends jaw on about sex with their boyfriends? No, clearly you don't. How can your vapid brain possibly comprehend the idea of loving any living thing other than yourself?
Oh wait. This is the person who thinks parents only care about their children because they hold the family crest.
Let me just say one more thing:
I would die for my son. He is my other half and he is part of me. So next time your thinking about sharing your asinine theories with the world, think about that.
"he is part of me"
If he is part you (yourself) then surely it is not selfless?
Also you say "how can you imagine loving anything other than yourself" and then go on to mention he is part of you. Thus you love yourself?
they're not my theories, they're theories from many before me. No need to call us vapid and totally selfish. And no I'm not a parent so I won't understand that perspective until if and when I do have a kid but even so whats wrong with entertaining the thought that these theories may have more truth than people give them credit for. I don't think this is a popular beliefs no matter how valid simply because people will take the comfortable lie over the cold truth.
I'm with you - there's no more steady a flame than mothers love for her little chickys :)No matter how old they get! And yeah, I would lay down my life for my son in a heartbeat.
if instinct took over before fear crept in, you could be selfless then,
like maybe see a toddler on the road, the body would move first to run and grab it
Yes, I actually do. It's the things no-one notices and no-one gets credit for, not that they want credit anyway. I like to believe there are good people who give of themself to make the world better, and I don't notice it. As a one-off, thank you. If you're one of them, then thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
This comes to mind though by Nietzche "He that humbleth himself wishes to be exalted." I've seen in jobs people that get angry when their efforts go unnoticed and I can't help but feel that those that work with integrity deep down want to appear as modest
There's generally an element of that. It's human nature to enjoy attention and to want effort to be recognised. But there are people who sit outside the human condition; mass murderers and the like. It's not unreasonable to believe there are people on the good side of that coin as well.
So there's nothing wrong with going to college to get a better job and make more money and being motivation my self-interest to do so, yet there is something wrong with doing good for others without being motivated by self-interest?
What's the big deal? A good deed is a good deed, motivation aside. Is it wrong to be motivated by self-interest if it leads to a child receiving a meal, a homeless family being led to a good home, a soldier receiving a prosthetic surgery? "Selfish" isn't exactly a negative thing, self-interest in wanting to be a good person is not either. Why is it selfish when someone does something for themselves that hurts others in the process, but selfless when someone does something for themselves that BENEFITS others? So what if there is no material gain?
i duno, maybe when it comes 2 ur kids, i dont have kids but i think id d o pretty much anything for them without thinking bout myself
If someone does something selfless, it's because
a) he will feel gratified, that he did a "good" thing
b) he would feel horrible about it if he didn't.
It's motivated by the way *you* subconsciously know you'll feel.
I think so.. I live in DC and recently a white man was killed trying to defend a black woman from some nigga who was hitting her. Now most whites know to mind their business here and keep it moving but this guy gave up his life doing the right thing by standing up for a woman. He was shot and killed on a normally busy street and the case remains unsolved. RIP to William Mitchell
Ha this is so irrelevant but didn't Phoebe try and prove this was true in friends but Joey then told her it wasn't possible because if you FELT GOOD from doing this act then it wouldn't be truly selfless anymore
We are driven in life by our desires, whether it be our desires to be accepted, acknowledged or valued for who we are and these desires are technically selfish in the fact that they are our wants and for us. What we do to fulfill our desires it what shapes who we are. And instead of becoming confused with the technicality of whether our actions are selfless why not focus on the fact that so many people have the capacity to do nice things just to feel good about themselves with demand for not other reward. That's why we should do good things....becuase it feels good. If there was no reward then why would people feel the urge to act positively towards each other? God didn't make sex so much fun because he didn't want us to do it, eh? It's likewise with good deeds.
A few years back I was backpacking through New Zealand and decided to hitch hike around the north Island. A guy picked up me and my partner (at the time) and drove us 100 miles north. During the journey he offered to put us up in his house for the night. We obliged and that night two complete strangers sat and had dinner with his wife and beautiful kids and later slept in one of his children's beds (obviously not while they were there) and had the most wonderful time. The next day he drove us onto the next town. We said thank you and went on our way. As I he drove off I couldn't help but feel like I wanted to give him something more than a thank you to show my gratification. But he did get something out of it, he left knowing he'd made a difference to two peoples lives and its a memory that I'll never forget. It gives me faith in humanity. Sod whether its selfless or not- if there were more people in the world doing things for others just for that feel good feeling then it would be a better place for us all.
I guess, from an agnostic point of view, the ultimate selfless act would be to forfeit ones own life for another. I mean if I felt someone else had more to live for than me, and I felt the world was a better place for having that person alive, it would simply seem just, and since I have no particular belief in reward or punishment in the afterlife, there would be no reason for me to do this for my own gain. If I felt any semblance of elevated self-worth or gratification at my act, for all I know it could be snuffed out in an instant, therefore the act would be entirely selfless.
Yes there is such a thing as a selfless act.
However there will be some who try to convince you otherwise, who try to promote the idea that everyone is selfish...
In my opinion... that's just an attempt to excuse one's own selfish tendencies, to make them appear normal so that they feel more comfortable with being selfish.
People do good things because it makes them feel good as well to do it. So there is always a little bit of self in every action.
Person saves child and sacrifices his life. Does it because its the right thing to do and "he wants" to do the right thing.
Again mostly selfless but always a tiny portion of self.
May I quickly also add that I do a selfless act every weekend. I've just split from my husband due to one too many domestic abuse incidences. Each weekend my two children see him and every morning bafore he arrives I talk about how exciting it is that he's coming and that he's so excited to see them. I create a positive environment for my kids and support them with the changes we have recently incurred due to him moving out by talking positively about him and acting as if I like him even though it makes me sick to the stomach to do so. What do I get out of this? Nothing other than the fact I know its the right thing to do.
That's not selfless because you're pretending for your children with the intention of making your children's upbringing happier, because if you were to see your children miserable that would make YOU miserable.
In other words, you're doing it for your children because that makes you feel good. The fact that you've posted your act up here just goes to show you are proud of your actions, indicating very clearly you gain gratification from doing it.
It's not a selfless act and if you think it is, you're in denial.
...AND I do it because it's the right thing to do. Because my daughter is only three years old, has Down Syndrome, had open heart surgery at three months old and has struggled to do absolutely EVERYTHING that 'normal' people take for granted. Like eating for example, I'm sure you find it easy to chew and swallow your food. Imagine having to learn how to chew and swallow because you've been dying for the first six months of your life and have been fed through a tube. I do it because my daughter has been through enough and doesn't dererve to now feel abandoned by her father.
Some people live wonderful cushtee little lives where they don't understand that somethings you just do because it's the right thing to do. I don't want a pat on the back, feeling 'Proud' is the last emotion I have felt since seperating for my husband, I just wanted to convince you that the act existed.
Not convinced that you have dis proven his point. You say that you do it to keep YOUR child happy to stop her suffering because YOU think its right and YOU wouldn't want her to grow up without a dad.
I think what you do is amazing but i think a little bit of self awareness in every act. Its probz like 99% Selfless and 1% self
last week a guy at the bar was ordering a pint. i was standing behind him, waiting. as he put his wallet in his back pocket, a £20 note fell out. and literally nobody realised. i tapped on his shoulder and handed it back to him, he looked astonished and said thank you. is that self less? im a student and could have definately done with that £20 in my pocket, but i thought hey, its not mine. maybe im an idiot, but i thought it was the right thing to do!!!
Sure, it was a very nice thing to do, but that's kind of why you did it, because it was what you consider the 'right' thing to do. You did it because to not do it would have made you feel guilt, or shame. When faced with the option of guilt or pride, most choose pride.
There is a selfish motivation there, but that's not to say it wasn't a good thing you did :)
There's a hotline for troubled kids and teenagers called Childline.Every year, someone donates 1million to them, and no one knows who he/she is! That must be someway self-less.
Yes, there is such thing as a selfless act. It's when you give up Godliness and become human knowing your fate as the son of God. Then when the time comes you allow yourself to be mocked, spat upon, falsely accused, humiliated, scourged (large whips with hooks) until so much of your skin is ripped off that your bones are showing and you know longer look human, then let them put a crown of thorns on your head that pierces your skull in numerous places (3-inches deep in some), then (with your body in the condition it's in) carry a huge cross they've given you to Golgotha, let them pierce your hands and feet while driving them into your large wooden cross which is giving you splinters on your skinless back, then wait until you die, then go to Hell for three days and finally come back to life. And all of this was to save the very people who did this to you. But even after you did all that, people still doubt you love them or that you are really the son of God and blame other humans' behaviours on you. You get things making fun of you, even. That seems pretty selfless to me. Thumbs up for Jesus!