Is staring normal?

74% Normal
5 Comments

Throughout my whole life I've been molested or raped, and now I'm engaged to a wonderful man and he makes me more happy than anyone in the world. I live in Canada, and he's in the U.S, so we only get to see each other every so often, like once a week every 4-5 months. I have cheated on him before, and I've resolved never to do so again, but I can't help looking at other men! I never think about having sex with them, but I do get small crushes on some of my guy friends, although I never act upon it. I can't help but think being used in all my relationships, and the whole rape thing have something to do with it, but I honestly don't know. So this is what I really want to know:
"Is it normal for people in commited relationships to stare at other people, and possibly have crushes?"

Voting Results
74% Normal
Based on 38 votes (28 yes)
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Comments ( 5 )
  • geckopaws
    15 years ago

    I think it is perfectly normal to stare at another guy from other than your significant other. Hell I was engaged to a man for 7 years and I cheated on him. I vowed to never do it again but basically when you usually cheat its because your not happy in your relationship usually. I think not seeing this fiance of yours for 4 or 5 months isn't a good thing either and well he shouldn't be mad at you because first of all he is not dedicated to you at all. Its normal trust me it is.

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  • lina222444
    15 years ago

    It is normal to stare at other people while commited, but I think your doing this because your not close to your boyfriend. I was currently in a long distance relationship as well and it didn't work out at all. My ex apparently got another woman pregnant and failed to tell me. I actually ended up finding out on facebook. The reason because I wasn't near him. If the relationship is good consider making arrangements either you can move to the US or he can come to canada. Good luck.

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    • LittleLady17
      15 years ago

      My fiancee and I have been together for 2 years, and we are very intimate with each other. While I thank you for your comment, I must say that nothing could be futher from the truth.

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      • [Old Memory]
        14 years ago

        You call a 2 year relationship in which you only see the guy a couple of times a year "committed?" Committed to what? I hope you have more than that planned.

        That you find yourself attracted to other men is healthy. That you stare & crush probably relates to the nature of your committed relationship - just not much action there to meet your needs.

        It disturbs me that you may attribute it to your previous abuse. I hope you get some help on that to get from under that shadow.

        But honestly, I think the crushing & gushing is just that a long distance relationship can't last too long or possibly make you happy & fulfilled as a healthy women living in the present.

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  • RockWebcast
    15 years ago

    Yes it's perfectly normal to find someone other then your significant other attractive. It's even normal to think about what it would be like to bone them. Sadly, these days it's even normal to take them out for a test drive.

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