That's a good point. If someone is actually hostile or toxic to your life, it's probably best to completely remove that negativity from your life. But too many people are quick to try and erase everything the second it doesn't pan out the way they wanted it to, you know?
In your examples though, I still think it's best not to avoid it. In the first scenario, ask them for a definitive answer and deal with the truth regardless of whether it's good or bad. In the second, they've given you the truth and you have your answer, and now you can try to move on. I'm not saying you shouldn't move on, I'm just saying you shouldn't hide behind a tree every time you see them.
Also a good point. I was curious to see what you thought because I was in a very similar situation. I was lead on for almost a year, and everytime I tried to "move on" she did something to pull me back in and gave me hope I had a chance.
This person was once considered my best friend, but after going through that for almost a year, I can't see how I could keep her in my life after being hurt so many times. It's very hard to be friends with someone who you're deeply attracted to in my opinion.
Is no contact the best solution to move on?
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That's a good point. If someone is actually hostile or toxic to your life, it's probably best to completely remove that negativity from your life. But too many people are quick to try and erase everything the second it doesn't pan out the way they wanted it to, you know?
In your examples though, I still think it's best not to avoid it. In the first scenario, ask them for a definitive answer and deal with the truth regardless of whether it's good or bad. In the second, they've given you the truth and you have your answer, and now you can try to move on. I'm not saying you shouldn't move on, I'm just saying you shouldn't hide behind a tree every time you see them.
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stonecutters93
11 years ago
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Also a good point. I was curious to see what you thought because I was in a very similar situation. I was lead on for almost a year, and everytime I tried to "move on" she did something to pull me back in and gave me hope I had a chance.
This person was once considered my best friend, but after going through that for almost a year, I can't see how I could keep her in my life after being hurt so many times. It's very hard to be friends with someone who you're deeply attracted to in my opinion.