Is it possible to not want your unborn baby?

I already have a 6 year old and I am not with her father anymore. The man I have been building a life with has made my current pregnancy unbearable. I am 8 months pregnant. He is emotionally and physically abusive. He is no longer the man I fell in love with and I really want to leave him. It is not my fault he is horrible to me and me staying just feels like I am condoning it and letting him get away with it. I honestly don't think having a baby will make it any better and I have no feelings for the unborn life. I have been in and out of the hospital twice already and I just regret falling pregnant.

Voting Results
75% Normal
Based on 24 votes (18 yes)
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 26 )
  • Grunewald

    Leave him and get help, but please don't kill your child. Single motherhood is hard, but people do it, and few indeed are those who, after having the baby and watching it grow up, wish they'd aborted it.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Ellenna

      How do you know only a few women wish they'd aborted a fetus? I know many women who've had abortions rather than give birth to an unwanted child. I'm not talking about abortions at 8 months pregnant, by the way, when in my view that is in fact a baby, I'm talking about early abortions.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • Grunewald

        I said, when they had watched it grow up. Into a child. You know, in retrospect. Not while they're still pregnant/in the throes of antenatal depression.

        Comment Hidden ( show )
          -
        • Ellenna

          Oh I get what you mean now. I suggested the possibility of abortion to my daughter when birth control failed and she was very young and she was considering it until she struck a Right to Life type nurse when she went for an ultrasound.

          She didn't abort and that fetus is now my beautiful 28 yo grandson.

          Comment Hidden ( show )
    • DIO

      You can't abort at 8 months. Get real.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • FromTheSouthWeirdMan

        You can abort at 8 months in New York

        Comment Hidden ( show )
          -
        • MissWolf

          What? Interesting

          Comment Hidden ( show )
            -
          • FromTheSouthWeirdMan

            Please dont do it

            Comment Hidden ( show )
      • Grunewald

        Sorry, missed that bit. But didn't Jethro and JBB also talk about killing unborn children/ 'keeping it'?

        Well, I hope I can be of any comfort to OP, anyway.

        Comment Hidden ( show )
          -
        • DIO

          I know. All 3 of you can't read properly.

          Comment Hidden ( show )
  • chuy

    Yes

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • RoseIsabella

    You need to leave this guy as soon as possible!

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Ellenna

    Unless he suddenly became abusive recently, it would've been better if you hadn't got pregnant to him in the first place.

    It's too late for an abortion now but not too late to leave him. Get yourself and your existing child to a women's shelter and after this baby is born you can decide whether or not to arrange for it to be adopted. Just get out: you, your child and the child to come deserve better.

    And please learn from this: I know birth control sometimes fails, in which case abortion is an option, but laziness and wishful thinking which results in another unwanted human being in the world is easy to avoid.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • RoseIsabella

      This!

      I also want to say I sincerely hope OP takes time out to learn how to spot the red flags of an abuser.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
    • TinyMom23

      Thank you Ellenna for the words of encouragement.
      Yes he did suddenly become aggro. Something that's never happened in the years I've known him.
      To be honest I was almost willing to forgive him but I honestly think I am stronger than this and to punish and unborn life that will be 100% dependent on me will only be punishment on this poor baby.

      In terms of contraception this baby was planned. Premature planning obviously. I regret a lot of things but I will definitely not be making the same mistake again.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • JellyBeanBandit

    Well you need to leave him anyway. Then you can decide whether you want to keep the baby or not.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • jethro

    Hey if you are a Democrat, I think it is manditory to kill your unborn children.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • TheBlindInquisitor

      The fuck? This political shit is getting really old.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
    • Clunk42

      I almost agree.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • FromTheSouthWeirdMan

    Can you be more specific than physically abusive? Is he slapping or punching you? I bear hugged a girl once that was slapping me and she told everyone that I was "physically abusive" so Im curious what you define as physical abuse

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • MissWolf

    From personal experience of being a single mother. I'd suggest getting your things and getting out of there. Like clothes and the nessaseties. Valuables like pictures etc. Go to a trusted friend/family or even a womans/family shelter. Calm down and thing it threw. If you still want to put the child up for adoption when they are born by all means that's up to you. I would suggest leaving the abusive relationship though. Also for not getting pregnant in the future. There is a 5 year and 10 year plan T -bar. Doesn't hurt at all and you dont even know it's there. I wish you luck and hope you'll be safe

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • leggs91200

    people are always on their best behavior at the start of a relationship but things often turn to crap.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • ellnell

    You should've aborted the fetus then.
    Please leave the babys father, it'd be very selfish of you to be with someone abusive and bring your child into such a relationship. You will mess up that babys life for good if you do that.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • ToTheMoon

    You don't like it, make like a tree and leave! Not much you can do about the child now but adoption. BUT! You choose to root, you choose no protection, now its time to be a good mother.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Iszzy123

    Yup it’s all fun and games till there’s a bun in the oven

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • leggs91200

      heh, man! that is when shit gets real.

      Comment Hidden ( show )