Is it normal wearing a "mask" (figuratively speaking) in social situations?

85% Normal
13 Comments

Hi everyone,

I have a question about socializing. I find that when I meet someone, I almost always do the same thing - I put on a "mask" (figuratively). The mask is like a facade, a fake version of me, I act really nice and shallow and calm.

Because the mask is not really me, after a period of socializing while wearing the mask, I feel burnt out and mentally drained. But when I am going to see the person again, I have to wear the mask because if I don't, my true personality will come out and then it will be different from the fake one, so I could come off as really weird or crazy. Does that make sense?

I feel like I almost always do this social behavior (of wearing the mask). Do you think this problem keeps me from making friends? I can't seem to make them.

So yes, I'm scared to take off the mask.

And what makes it 10x worse is that I've been acting fake around people for years. I'm not even sure who the real me is.

Is this normal?

Voting Results
85% Normal
Based on 13 votes (11 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • BeautifulDreamer612
    6 years ago

    Everyone wears a mask.

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  • NinjaKitten
    6 years ago

    i have a personality disorder. it feels like a pile of masks. but not really. it is different from forcing a mask on a facade. its nothing like that. i cant help it. and its like everything in me changes. its kind of scary. well i won't talk about it in ur topic though :)

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      6 years ago

      Thank you for your reply, that sounds difficult. But yeah, as you said, it is not the issue that I have.

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  • suckonthis9
    6 years ago

    No it's not normal, but perverted mass-murdering police-criminal scumbags do it all the time, and make some pretense that they are in some way human, when they are, in fact, a gang of thoughtless, incompetent, utterly obnoxious creatures.
    All of them!

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    • RoseIsabella
      6 years ago

      People with antisocial personality disorder wear big masks as to most narcissists.

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  • snoopmoth
    6 years ago

    You're probably insecure and afraid to show your true self. Try to wear your mask less, it's scary at first but you'll make friends who like you for who you really are.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      6 years ago

      I don't think who I really am is going to appeal to people. Although I don't know for sure exactly who the real me is.

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      • snoopmoth
        6 years ago

        No one in the world is so different that you can't find someone else like you. I don't have many friends because I don't relate to many people (and vice versa) but I have a couple and that's all I need. And it took me time to find them. I don't really believe in people having a "real" self. You are who you decide to be. And you change.

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  • MrDexter
    6 years ago

    As for If wearing a mask hurts relationships. Yes it does! You can't bond with people unless you let them in. When you put a mask they fall in love with your ego not you. So you can never have someone who is truly loving you for you.

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  • bubsy
    6 years ago

    The key part of interacting is ACTING. Of course you'll act differently to your parents vs your friends vs complete strangers. But you get to control how you act.

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  • RoseIsabella
    6 years ago

    The more difference there is between the mask and who you really are the more messed up you are.

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  • MrDexter
    6 years ago

    Well I do this too but being unable to honestly socialize and needing a mask is often considered symptom of a disorder. Like sociopath, psychopathy, narcissm.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      6 years ago

      I am pretty self-absorbed and I have trouble relating to others but I don't think any of that is extreme enough to be considered a disorder.

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