Bullshit, you don't have to b stunning, Who gives a shit what a bunch of assholes think! Unless you have scars or burns all over, theres no reason to wear it. What ever u r it's too goddamm bad if they don't like it. Don't let other people control your life! Im sure there bodies are not perfect and even if they r then there must b something else wrong with them! Look Closer!
In this society, it certainly feels like you have to. Big boobs, thin thighs, flat stomach, hairless skin, great ass, the list goes on. It's what's expected of women these days. The pressure is enormous.
I'm far from the ideal perception the media bombards us with. I know most people are as well. But I'm just all around ugly looking. There's not one single thing I like about myself.
I wish I could just go out there and be myself, stand up for myself. But in the past I've had every comment you can think of slung at me, and it makes it very difficult to defend yourself sometimes with all these going around in your head. I normally end up just bursting into tears if I put myself in that position- it's much easier to hide away and not have to deal with it.
I don't have scars all over, but I do have them quite bad on my upper thighs and upper arms and shoulders, and a few on my stomach, as well as a few on my wrist (luckily most of them on my wrist have faded though) where I used to cut. It makes it difficult sometimes to find other clothes to wear, but it could be a lot worse.
I feel for you. I'm a guy and I hate the standard the media forces on men and women! TV producers can kiss my cock!
Back on topic!
Don't think that! I bet you any money that you are a lovely beautiful person, that is just insecure, cause of crappy friends/ classmates/ >insert generic people here<. Most times, the girl that thinks she is ugly, is amongst the prettiest, but just doesn't know it.
Don't think of what people think of you. You are free to do whatever you want. Why bind yourself like that?!
You are making your own "prison" with the coat thing.
You got time to enjoy the things life has to offer and please don't cut yourself. You seem to be an intelligent person, given the fact of how many times you have replied and the information in the reply/ poll.
And tell me. What good will isolating yourself do? You will feel worse.
Why should you suffer and cry, while others laugh and cheer? You shouldn't! It's rubbish! You are as good, if not better, than all of your collegues and friends.
Truth be told: Noone is perfect. Those friends and classmates of yours aren't all superstars and models. Are they? No, they are not. I bet my teeth on it! I used to feel somewhat insecure too. I was overweight back in school. I was the strongest in my class, but still, the boys would make fun and the girls would avoid me. I was that fat kid that sat in the first row and talked about cars to his, then, only best friend. I did not let that bring me down in the long run. One day I said: "Screw this. I am not going to ruin my life, cause of other people". I dealt with that insecurity. I found a way to get the girls to like me and the boys to look up to me. Humor on the ladies. I know a lot of jokes. Girls like to laugh, they did and found that I am a guy with a nice personality. And the boys? Gym challenge. Who can lift the most. I can, befriended most of them. That changed my life. Lost weight after time and things really started rolling. 12th grade, I was at the top of the class, friend with nearly everyone, a date to prom with the coolest and prettiest girl. Now I am in the university with very good friends that I can rely on and even love. Going on trips, party at friends place every weekend, helping a mate start his car on a cold morning (His doesn't start, mine does XD) and saving up for xenon headlights for my car. Now I have a bit of a beer belly, but hey... These are the effects of Germany on a person's immage right XD.
You can do that same thing (not the xenon headlighs, doubt you need those, or drinking large quantities of booze with frieds, watching Rambo II)! Enjoy life again!
Take that coat off, do what you are good at. Make new friends. What do you like to do? You like reading? Go make friends with people that like reading stuff. Like hiking? Go on a hike. Hikers are some of the nicest people I've ever met... Have a hobby. You like carving wood. Do it. You can even make a profit. You are what you want to be.
Ok, I've gone on for quite some time now, time to end this comment.
I would give you a big hug 'ya know?
I wish you the best.
Take care love.
It's really so lovely seeing all of these supportive comments I've been getting here, and knowing that not everyone is going to want to try to hurt me in someway.
There /are/ good people out there. I think I just need to find them- make some real friends who will stick by my side and give me a boost when I'm feeling down, not push me spiraling down even further.
I do just wish I just had someone to give me a big cuddle sometimes and just tell me that everything will be okay... But until then, I guess I'll just have to see this through on my own.
It's inspiring reading your story as well and seeing how you managed to turn your life around. You're very strong and brave, and I hope I'll be able to be like that one day. Thank you.. Please take care and carry on enjoying life, you deserve it.
Oh Sugar, please don't cut yourself! If you're a very thin person that might be a contributing factor to feeling cold all the time. Also people who have an under active thyroid glad tend get quite cold. The stereotype for those with hypothyroidism is to be overweight but I have met lean people with that issue too. Another symptom of a thyroid problem would be sore, stiff muscles as well as thinning hair on the eye eyebrows. I'm not a doctor so take my suggestions with a grain of salt and please don't hesitate to get yourself checked out.
One last thing maybe you're using your coat as transitional object to comfort yourself which is why I mentioned security blankets and Teddy bears in my earlier comment.
Oh don't worry both of you. I stopped self-harming for the most part over a year ago now. I try not to think about it too much or even let the idea into slip into my head, but I don't think I'm in too much danger of starting again. It was just a coping mechanism at the time that allowed me to just shut everything else out. But really? Okay it takes some of reality away for a few minutes, but it only get's worse afterwards. It's really not worth it all the grief it brings and I realize that now.
I'm sure one day I'll find a way to be happy with myself and comfortable in my own skin. I've tried talking to a councilor in college a few months back, but ended up just shutting down completely, nothing but tears and just not being able to say much. I think I just need the right people in my life to support me and give me confidence that I can be myself and to defend that.
I feel very sad for u that you would cut yourself! That's horrible. I can relate to the part about hiding away, though that's beacause that's the easiest thing to do.I have done that myself just because I gained a couple of pounds. Haven't u ever seen some of the Celebs wives they're ugly as sin. So there must b something their husbands like about them. You have to keep fighting or there's no point in going on. Believe me I look like a Freak, I have Tattoos, Purple Hair, and all that matters is that I like it, not them. When I was younger I cared what other people thought like u do. But not anymore, Life does not go on forever. Dermablend would cover your scars. It's not that expensive. Just Fuck everyone. Live your life, Many people have tried to bring me down and control me. But you can't let them! If I can do it U can too.
Someone once told me. Act as if! u get me. If anyone says anything to you, say so what, or just completely ignore them. They'll stop. I'm sure you don't look that bad. But don't compare yourself to airbrushed women in magazines. They're fake! All u need is one person on your side, then life will seem much less of a battle. I don't want to go into my whole life story but believe I had it tough. and still do. In some areas. I am older, and hopefully wiser. And Please don't cut. it makes me very sad.
Is it normal to wear a coat all the time?
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Bullshit, you don't have to b stunning, Who gives a shit what a bunch of assholes think! Unless you have scars or burns all over, theres no reason to wear it. What ever u r it's too goddamm bad if they don't like it. Don't let other people control your life! Im sure there bodies are not perfect and even if they r then there must b something else wrong with them! Look Closer!
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In this society, it certainly feels like you have to. Big boobs, thin thighs, flat stomach, hairless skin, great ass, the list goes on. It's what's expected of women these days. The pressure is enormous.
I'm far from the ideal perception the media bombards us with. I know most people are as well. But I'm just all around ugly looking. There's not one single thing I like about myself.
I wish I could just go out there and be myself, stand up for myself. But in the past I've had every comment you can think of slung at me, and it makes it very difficult to defend yourself sometimes with all these going around in your head. I normally end up just bursting into tears if I put myself in that position- it's much easier to hide away and not have to deal with it.
I don't have scars all over, but I do have them quite bad on my upper thighs and upper arms and shoulders, and a few on my stomach, as well as a few on my wrist (luckily most of them on my wrist have faded though) where I used to cut. It makes it difficult sometimes to find other clothes to wear, but it could be a lot worse.
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megadriver
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I feel for you. I'm a guy and I hate the standard the media forces on men and women! TV producers can kiss my cock!
Back on topic!
Don't think that! I bet you any money that you are a lovely beautiful person, that is just insecure, cause of crappy friends/ classmates/ >insert generic people here<. Most times, the girl that thinks she is ugly, is amongst the prettiest, but just doesn't know it.
Don't think of what people think of you. You are free to do whatever you want. Why bind yourself like that?!
You are making your own "prison" with the coat thing.
You got time to enjoy the things life has to offer and please don't cut yourself. You seem to be an intelligent person, given the fact of how many times you have replied and the information in the reply/ poll.
And tell me. What good will isolating yourself do? You will feel worse.
Why should you suffer and cry, while others laugh and cheer? You shouldn't! It's rubbish! You are as good, if not better, than all of your collegues and friends.
Truth be told: Noone is perfect. Those friends and classmates of yours aren't all superstars and models. Are they? No, they are not. I bet my teeth on it! I used to feel somewhat insecure too. I was overweight back in school. I was the strongest in my class, but still, the boys would make fun and the girls would avoid me. I was that fat kid that sat in the first row and talked about cars to his, then, only best friend. I did not let that bring me down in the long run. One day I said: "Screw this. I am not going to ruin my life, cause of other people". I dealt with that insecurity. I found a way to get the girls to like me and the boys to look up to me. Humor on the ladies. I know a lot of jokes. Girls like to laugh, they did and found that I am a guy with a nice personality. And the boys? Gym challenge. Who can lift the most. I can, befriended most of them. That changed my life. Lost weight after time and things really started rolling. 12th grade, I was at the top of the class, friend with nearly everyone, a date to prom with the coolest and prettiest girl. Now I am in the university with very good friends that I can rely on and even love. Going on trips, party at friends place every weekend, helping a mate start his car on a cold morning (His doesn't start, mine does XD) and saving up for xenon headlights for my car. Now I have a bit of a beer belly, but hey... These are the effects of Germany on a person's immage right XD.
You can do that same thing (not the xenon headlighs, doubt you need those, or drinking large quantities of booze with frieds, watching Rambo II)! Enjoy life again!
Take that coat off, do what you are good at. Make new friends. What do you like to do? You like reading? Go make friends with people that like reading stuff. Like hiking? Go on a hike. Hikers are some of the nicest people I've ever met... Have a hobby. You like carving wood. Do it. You can even make a profit. You are what you want to be.
Ok, I've gone on for quite some time now, time to end this comment.
I would give you a big hug 'ya know?
I wish you the best.
Take care love.
--
Anonymous Post Author
9 years ago
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Just thank you. ; - ;
It's really so lovely seeing all of these supportive comments I've been getting here, and knowing that not everyone is going to want to try to hurt me in someway.
There /are/ good people out there. I think I just need to find them- make some real friends who will stick by my side and give me a boost when I'm feeling down, not push me spiraling down even further.
I do just wish I just had someone to give me a big cuddle sometimes and just tell me that everything will be okay... But until then, I guess I'll just have to see this through on my own.
It's inspiring reading your story as well and seeing how you managed to turn your life around. You're very strong and brave, and I hope I'll be able to be like that one day. Thank you.. Please take care and carry on enjoying life, you deserve it.
Oh Sugar, please don't cut yourself! If you're a very thin person that might be a contributing factor to feeling cold all the time. Also people who have an under active thyroid glad tend get quite cold. The stereotype for those with hypothyroidism is to be overweight but I have met lean people with that issue too. Another symptom of a thyroid problem would be sore, stiff muscles as well as thinning hair on the eye eyebrows. I'm not a doctor so take my suggestions with a grain of salt and please don't hesitate to get yourself checked out.
One last thing maybe you're using your coat as transitional object to comfort yourself which is why I mentioned security blankets and Teddy bears in my earlier comment.
--
Anonymous Post Author
9 years ago
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Oh don't worry both of you. I stopped self-harming for the most part over a year ago now. I try not to think about it too much or even let the idea into slip into my head, but I don't think I'm in too much danger of starting again. It was just a coping mechanism at the time that allowed me to just shut everything else out. But really? Okay it takes some of reality away for a few minutes, but it only get's worse afterwards. It's really not worth it all the grief it brings and I realize that now.
I'm sure one day I'll find a way to be happy with myself and comfortable in my own skin. I've tried talking to a councilor in college a few months back, but ended up just shutting down completely, nothing but tears and just not being able to say much. I think I just need the right people in my life to support me and give me confidence that I can be myself and to defend that.
I feel very sad for u that you would cut yourself! That's horrible. I can relate to the part about hiding away, though that's beacause that's the easiest thing to do.I have done that myself just because I gained a couple of pounds. Haven't u ever seen some of the Celebs wives they're ugly as sin. So there must b something their husbands like about them. You have to keep fighting or there's no point in going on. Believe me I look like a Freak, I have Tattoos, Purple Hair, and all that matters is that I like it, not them. When I was younger I cared what other people thought like u do. But not anymore, Life does not go on forever. Dermablend would cover your scars. It's not that expensive. Just Fuck everyone. Live your life, Many people have tried to bring me down and control me. But you can't let them! If I can do it U can too.
Someone once told me. Act as if! u get me. If anyone says anything to you, say so what, or just completely ignore them. They'll stop. I'm sure you don't look that bad. But don't compare yourself to airbrushed women in magazines. They're fake! All u need is one person on your side, then life will seem much less of a battle. I don't want to go into my whole life story but believe I had it tough. and still do. In some areas. I am older, and hopefully wiser. And Please don't cut. it makes me very sad.