Some parents are just fucking idiots and somehow become immune to their child's crying i.e. their parental instincts have somehow gone numb. Chances are, those kids were being carted around shopping all day, are way overdue for a nap, probably hungry with blood sugar that has gone through the floor and just want some damned attention, food or some sleep. We wonder why our kids are developing horrible anxiety disorders as teens, but fail to give them proper care and structure as small children, when it is MOST VITAL.
And hell, some parents just can't discipline their kids. As a kid, if I would have thrown a fit over some damned oreos, I'd be taken to the car by my Dad and given a whooping and I would come back in, sniveling, but quiet. If it was my Mom, I wouldn't be whooped, I'd be taken straight home and she would have left me with my Dad so she could shop alone and my Dad would punish me. Many parents don't have such relationships with each other any more and are not willing to commit to regular discipline because it would inconvenience them further than simply being a parent already has.
TL;DR normal, some people should just stick to dogs and cats.
I agree with what you said, only I don't think hitting the kid is effective discipline.
When I have a kid screaming in a supermarket, I take them home. I don't want to inflict that shit on other people, and I don't want to have to deal with it there.
One of my kids had a massive tantrum at playgroup the other day. We're toilet training, and he still shits his pants (he wakes up in the morning and tells me "I will make poo on the floor" emphasis on 'will' - he doesn't have any intention of following through, he just thinks telling me is funny...)
So he shat his pants, and I took him to the toilet to clean him up. We had no wipes, I was intending to use toilet paper and water. He flipped for some reason, and we had half an hour of him screaming til his face was red and snotty. It was as if I was beating the shit out of him...and I wanted to whack him for it, believe me. But I didn't, because I'm the adult, and if I'm to teach him about impulse control and appropriate behaviour, I need to model it. I did yell though, and I never yell :/
Finally got the shit off him (and the walls...and the toilet...and the floor...ugh...) and he refused to wash his hands so I left him to pack away and get ready to go, and then he screamed more, that he wanted to wash his hands, so I turned on the tap and he refused, so I bundled him, bucking and screaming, into the pram and we left, him shrieking, me bright red with a mix of embarrassment and anger. We got about 5mins before the shrieking got too much for me. Got him out, hugged him tight, spoke calmly, told him I understand he's upset, but this behaviour is not acceptable and the consequences of doing this are that we have to go home and he has to go to bed. He stopped screaming. Took him home, put him to bed.
But to anyone observing the situation, I would be terrible at my job, no matter what I did. For not calming him down quicker, I'm bad. For hugging him instead of hitting him or yelling, I'm bad. For hitting him, I would be Satan.
No matter what you do, when it comes to kids, people are going to condemn you. Shit, when it comes to anything, people are going to condemn you.
TL;DR: To answer the OP's question, it's fucking annoying when kids scream in public. But it's the parent/carer who should be taking charge of the situation. And it might not necessarily look like we're doing that, but each situation and child/carer relationship is different.
Kind of that damned if you do, damned if you don't situation going on. I don't disagree that hitting is an ineffective form a discipline, I was just listing an example.
When I am out in public and doing whatever I am doing, I frequently see a parent with a kid in a stroller that is just... SCREAMING. Honestly, when you're standing in an aisle picking yourself up a product and the parent next to you have a stroller with a screaming and bawling child in it and seemingly no awareness that the child is screaming, I want to flip a cork. This is becoming WAY too common. =/
I see that kid in pram screaming thing frequently at like...10pm...which raises the question what the fuck are these parents doing walking around with young kids this late? Otherwise, during the day, UmI've been that adult ignoring the screaming...but I've also been rushing to get them the fuck out of there.
Sometimes it puts me off wanting kids. Then I think MINE would never be like that.
Then I remember that while some stuff is learnt behaviour, temperament is luck of the draw :/
Is it normal to want to scream at screaming children?
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Some parents are just fucking idiots and somehow become immune to their child's crying i.e. their parental instincts have somehow gone numb. Chances are, those kids were being carted around shopping all day, are way overdue for a nap, probably hungry with blood sugar that has gone through the floor and just want some damned attention, food or some sleep. We wonder why our kids are developing horrible anxiety disorders as teens, but fail to give them proper care and structure as small children, when it is MOST VITAL.
And hell, some parents just can't discipline their kids. As a kid, if I would have thrown a fit over some damned oreos, I'd be taken to the car by my Dad and given a whooping and I would come back in, sniveling, but quiet. If it was my Mom, I wouldn't be whooped, I'd be taken straight home and she would have left me with my Dad so she could shop alone and my Dad would punish me. Many parents don't have such relationships with each other any more and are not willing to commit to regular discipline because it would inconvenience them further than simply being a parent already has.
TL;DR normal, some people should just stick to dogs and cats.
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charli.m
10 years ago
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I agree with what you said, only I don't think hitting the kid is effective discipline.
When I have a kid screaming in a supermarket, I take them home. I don't want to inflict that shit on other people, and I don't want to have to deal with it there.
One of my kids had a massive tantrum at playgroup the other day. We're toilet training, and he still shits his pants (he wakes up in the morning and tells me "I will make poo on the floor" emphasis on 'will' - he doesn't have any intention of following through, he just thinks telling me is funny...)
So he shat his pants, and I took him to the toilet to clean him up. We had no wipes, I was intending to use toilet paper and water. He flipped for some reason, and we had half an hour of him screaming til his face was red and snotty. It was as if I was beating the shit out of him...and I wanted to whack him for it, believe me. But I didn't, because I'm the adult, and if I'm to teach him about impulse control and appropriate behaviour, I need to model it. I did yell though, and I never yell :/
Finally got the shit off him (and the walls...and the toilet...and the floor...ugh...) and he refused to wash his hands so I left him to pack away and get ready to go, and then he screamed more, that he wanted to wash his hands, so I turned on the tap and he refused, so I bundled him, bucking and screaming, into the pram and we left, him shrieking, me bright red with a mix of embarrassment and anger. We got about 5mins before the shrieking got too much for me. Got him out, hugged him tight, spoke calmly, told him I understand he's upset, but this behaviour is not acceptable and the consequences of doing this are that we have to go home and he has to go to bed. He stopped screaming. Took him home, put him to bed.
But to anyone observing the situation, I would be terrible at my job, no matter what I did. For not calming him down quicker, I'm bad. For hugging him instead of hitting him or yelling, I'm bad. For hitting him, I would be Satan.
No matter what you do, when it comes to kids, people are going to condemn you. Shit, when it comes to anything, people are going to condemn you.
TL;DR: To answer the OP's question, it's fucking annoying when kids scream in public. But it's the parent/carer who should be taking charge of the situation. And it might not necessarily look like we're doing that, but each situation and child/carer relationship is different.
--
NeuroNeptunian
10 years ago
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Kind of that damned if you do, damned if you don't situation going on. I don't disagree that hitting is an ineffective form a discipline, I was just listing an example.
When I am out in public and doing whatever I am doing, I frequently see a parent with a kid in a stroller that is just... SCREAMING. Honestly, when you're standing in an aisle picking yourself up a product and the parent next to you have a stroller with a screaming and bawling child in it and seemingly no awareness that the child is screaming, I want to flip a cork. This is becoming WAY too common. =/
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charli.m
10 years ago
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Blah badly worded, didn't mean to imply you did.
I see that kid in pram screaming thing frequently at like...10pm...which raises the question what the fuck are these parents doing walking around with young kids this late? Otherwise, during the day, UmI've been that adult ignoring the screaming...but I've also been rushing to get them the fuck out of there.
Sometimes it puts me off wanting kids. Then I think MINE would never be like that.
Then I remember that while some stuff is learnt behaviour, temperament is luck of the draw :/