Is it normal to want to lower your sexdrive to match your partner?

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4 Comments

Let's say you are the submissive in the relationship and your partner is the Dominant one.....you have a MUCH higher sexdrive than they do and you feel it is your duty to lower your excessively high sexdrive to match their almost non-existent one. You don't see them that often because you live in different cities (which in a few months will change), but before you move to them, you want to lower your drive because arguments about sex is the last thing you want happening.....so you put yourself into complete chastity.....no masturbation, no sex toys, no looking at sexy things, no sexual thoughts (even though that seems impossible after a while), you unfortunately cannot control your dreams and now (after a month of no pleasurable contact with yourself) you are having sex nightmares daily. How do you stop having them? Is it normal to want to be this accommodating (but miserable at the same time)?

Is It Normal?
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  • dom180
    9 years ago | pl

    The partner with the higher sex drive has it a lot easier, because their sex drive *can* be artificially lowered by masturbating regularly. Putting yourself into chastity is exactly the wrong way to do it.

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  • (s)aint
    9 years ago | pl

    I'm a sex addict myself and you should not try to lower your own to match someone who barely has any? :S

    I'm the Sub too and here's what you could do: Your Dom could and should punish you with days without sex and then make sure to satisfy you at least 3-4 times a week.

    I require sex at LEAST once per day if I'm with my boyfriend.If I'm not it's easier to manage.

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  • RoseIsabella
    9 years ago | pl

    In my humble opinion, this sounds like a case of pathological codependence. Unless you're some sort of rabid sex addict I would say this whole thing sounds quite extreme. The notion of one person completely compromising his or her authentic self in such a way as you've suggested is quite a sad and desperate idea.

    Perhaps you would be better served by being less submissive and seeking out an equal partner? I'm sure it would take some work, but mutually equality and self respect are well worth it.

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  • nrmlmn
    9 years ago | pl

    what a retard!

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