Is it normal to want to leave home?

For Anon.

I know how bad things can get for you at home. It really hurts when parents have trouble expressing their pride and love to a child. Don't listen to these ramblers who say that you need to "grow up" because if things are as you describe them to be, you might have never truly felt what it should feel like when you grow up under your parents, and I feel for 'ya.

My advice would not be to rebel or deceive your parents, because as this may feel good at the time, they won't like it when they find out. Instead, try to stick it through to college and keep up with your friends. Keep in mind that this is not as abnormal as you think, and that your parents are really just trying to push you hard enough so you succeed. Their intention is not to hurt your feelings, but to keep you on your toes.

Also, find a group of friends you feel comfortable with, and if you stumble upon the topic of grades or parents, casually ask everyone as a whole if any of them feel that their parents are strict. It's fairly easy to answer that question, and most likely a few would agree that some parents are just too harsh and unrewarding.

Didn't appreciate them one bit. All I caused was hatred. Now I'm free from them, which is a relief, but I do miss them (believe it or not). A bit of space can do a great deal! I just wish I hadn't mucked everything up so much before hand, because now I'm having to patch it up. I know it feels like ages away and this is cliche, but time does fly. It felt like a few days ago that I started college, and now I'm half way through my first year at uni. Look forward.

I'm a teenage (well 19 year old) girl, who went to uni this year. I had similar problems with my parents for the 2 years before, but decided to rebel. Had sex, smoked, drank, until they would kick me out. But they didn't. I didn

im glad that i have helped. i know how hard it is trying to find your own place in the world because it took me a long time to get myself back on track. i would give anything to go back and try my hardest at school so i could have gone to university and become a lawyer. but because i didnt even finish school, i am stuck in a dead end job. the better you do in school, the more options you will have and the better your future will be. so i wish you all the best!! xx

iluvkitties... listen to aussiewolf

Your advice was to pretty much do what I have been doing so I guess nothing will change. I only have a couple more years until college so I guess you're right, I just need to go to college, get a job, and move out.
I broke up with my boyfriend because of what you said. The only reason I was with him was because I didn't know how to deal with my parents. It was completely my choice to choose him to go out with when I knew he wasn't a good influence. So thank you, I'm officially out of that crowd and today I went into town with my old friends. I'm trying to focus on school work and the people I want to be with. So thanks, I guess, you may not realize it but you really changed my life.

well you have been given advice and you are not willing to take it. i dont think you are going to be advised what you want to hear, whatever that is. just do what i told you to do and you will be fine. why did you break up with your boyfriend?

I don't demand respect without giving it return. I wish I could help you understand my story a little better. I live in a town where my story is pretty much unheard of, that's why I hang out with people who have other problems so they won't judge me like everyone else. I know there are millions of other people who have it 100x worse than me, but I just wanted some advice. A problem is a problem no matter how it compares to the rest of the world.
Just to let you know I broke up with my boyfriend today.

Dude, you're like my twin, my parents also expect all As and when I got 2 Bs my parents banned all electronics from me for 2 months (one month for each B) and now I constantly sit on the roof (you can access it from my window...it's actually quite a nice reading spot) and I just stare up and dream about running away

well im sorry to say but high school is past your childhood and you need to start growing up. and being mature is all part of growing up. its normal for teenagers to think they know it all and to think they should be able to demand respect without giving it in return. sure your parents might yell or whatever but who really cares? its your choice to hang out with druggies, you cant blame your parents for that. its unfortunate that teenagers are so judgmental and will judge you because of what your parents are like but that is what being a teenager is all about and learning from any mistakes you and anyone else makes.
i dont really want to compare but your "situation" isnt that bad. i can tell you some stories about my teenage years that would freak you out and you would think yourself lucky that your mum only yells at you and nothing more. i think you need to appreciate that your parents do what they can for you to have a good life and will continue to do so, whether they know how to do it the right way or not. be nice to your parents, dont talk back. just focus on your school to get into a good college so you can get a good job to afford to move out.
and no i am not a teenager.

I know I am almost an adult but I still consider high school 'childhood.' My parents can think whatever they want of me, but the way they express it is the problem. My mom yells and swears really loud, and has been doing that since I was about 2. I'm embarrassed whenever my friends are around her and spend most my nights crying because I know no one else has to go through what I do. For the past year, I have been drifting away from my friends and moving closer towards the druggies or trouble makers because I know they won't judge me for having the parents I do because they have tough problems of their own. For the past year-ish I have been dating a kid a year older than me who is probably in to drugs because I just don't know how to deal with my parents. My situation is worse than you think even though my description of it doesn't really prove that.

Aussiwolf - are you a teenager?

thanks p-monkey4life i might try that...or not

ya whatever we'll see what happens...

You could do that or rebel .... i knew a kid who took a dump on the livingroom floor to piss his parents off. Worked they thought he had some deep seeded emotional problems .... let him get away with murder after that... all he had to do is go to therapy 2 x a week.

But thats exactly what I dont want to do... I have been thinking that that is the only solution and I'm trying to find another one. I don't want to completely lose my childhood because of my parents. That's why I pretend like nothing is wrong in school - so people will like me and invite me over. I don't ever invite anyone over because of my mom and my friends are perfectly okay with that because they know about my mom. I can't stand living my life embarrassed to have people over. My worst fear is being like my mom as an adult and if i ruin my childhood, that is going to happen. I have to resort to websites like this to tell my problems to and that's not right.

heres some advice. dont talk back to your parents, do as your told. dont invite people over, go out to meet your friends. do your best at school to get into a good college so you can leave home. just do what you can to keep the peace and then when you leave home, you can do whatever you want. your parents obviously see their kids as investments, not as their children.

Thanks lightup and p-monkey4life for commenting on my story...

I dont think the both of you understand what it is like living in my home. I never act ungrateful towards my parents. My parents think I am ungrateful just because I might not agree with them on something. I try to talk to them but they won't talk back. My mom's way of dealing with things is either the silent treatment or screaming and swearing so everyone in the neighborhood can hear - either way there is no productive communication happening. My dad's way of dealing with things is sarcasm to make me feel stupid. All parents care about how their child is doing in one way or another but my parents just care in the wrong way. It seems like there is always something wrong with me. I don't want to seem like a whining teen or something but if I do something like invite a boy over they go crazy and embarrass me to death and even punish me. Or I might get a C on a test and even though it was the beginning of a chapter and the teacher didn't expect us to do well, my parents would ground me and tell me I wouldn't being going to college with grades like this. My mom yells constantly and my brothers and I have began to be afraid of her. I don't want our relationship to be bad when we are all out of college. I hate acting like everything is cool in school when really I spend most of my nights crying myself to sleep. Sorry for the lengthy comment but I'm just trying to give you some kind of an understanding of what my life is like.

You are ungrateful.... so your parents expect a lot from you. Maybe next time be thankful your parents give a shit...there a lot of kids out there that would take any attention from their parents, because they dont care. As far advice ... my grandmother has no idea about todays technology or procedures, but she gives fantastic life lessons. Grow up and stop whining

I think it's normal to want to leave home. But it is not normal for parents to expect so highly from you. Do the best that you can in school, and if your parents can't see that you are, you have to tell them in words that you're trying your best and that it's really hard for you to please them. Developing a healthy communication life-style with your parents is normal and beneficial for the both of you. Goodluck

you are past your childhood, you are nearly an adult. the way you are talking does make you sound like an everyday normal teenager. in saying that, i reckon your parents are right about you.