Yea easier said than done. He has always been there for me. He's just the perfect Guy so ta speak. I believe in mistakes because everyone makes them. But I guess my thing is how would I manage without him? I never really had a job.
You would be in 'shit street' with 4 kids wailing for their daddy, without enough money or help when one of the four is sick. For the sake of your kids, stay put - until they are at least of an age where they are a little more independent.
You cannot make a decision like this, so soon after having a baby, as you could be hormonal. It seems to me that you must've forgiven him - otherwise you wouldn't be sleeping with him and having more babies. If you are going to make long term plans, make sure this is your last baby!!!! There's nothing he likes better than you barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen.
Babies trap you there with him - simple as that!
I think if you can even have sex with him, then you must still want it to work out. It may well do, if you can spend some quality time together without loads of kids interrupting any free time you may have. You need to find each other again - as two adults and not as 'parents'.
Give this one time and stop having babies, and I think you two might just make it through.
Not my usual advice, I know - but there are very young children involved here.
Great advice, Joybird. It really needed to be said.
The best answer isn't always the answer that sounds nice and reassuring and sometimes the best answer doesn't solve the problem but the best answer is THE best answer =/ I'd like to say divorce and go live a happy life, but the reality is, being married and not entirely happy sounds much better than being a single mum with four young children, even if the custody, child support and alimony hearings work out. Four children... good god I don't know how some women do it as single parents...
I've already been through this with my sister who had 4 kids under 6yo and the husband had the house up for repossession and cleaned out all the kids' bank accounts as well as their joint account. It also cost her $60,000 in lawyers' and court fees!! She was ok though coz I was way ahead of that b@stard - this girl sounds like she's on her own.
Poor mcmzs5 seems to think her husband would worry about her taking up with another man. Where the hell would she ever be able to go to in order to meet one? Not only that, does she really think she's a great catch? All a new man knows is that she's not a virgin but few want an 'instant family' to support.
The OP has made her bed and is just going to have to lie in it for the next 10 years for the sake of these kids' welfare. She'll still be young enough in 10 years time if she wants another man.
Put your kids first regardless of your sexual pleasure with your husband.
Chill out girl and be glad the man is even on the scene!
Is it normal to want to end my marriage
← View full post
Yea easier said than done. He has always been there for me. He's just the perfect Guy so ta speak. I believe in mistakes because everyone makes them. But I guess my thing is how would I manage without him? I never really had a job.
--
joybird
11 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
2
2
You would be in 'shit street' with 4 kids wailing for their daddy, without enough money or help when one of the four is sick. For the sake of your kids, stay put - until they are at least of an age where they are a little more independent.
You cannot make a decision like this, so soon after having a baby, as you could be hormonal. It seems to me that you must've forgiven him - otherwise you wouldn't be sleeping with him and having more babies. If you are going to make long term plans, make sure this is your last baby!!!! There's nothing he likes better than you barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen.
Babies trap you there with him - simple as that!
I think if you can even have sex with him, then you must still want it to work out. It may well do, if you can spend some quality time together without loads of kids interrupting any free time you may have. You need to find each other again - as two adults and not as 'parents'.
Give this one time and stop having babies, and I think you two might just make it through.
Not my usual advice, I know - but there are very young children involved here.
Good luck!!
--
NeuroNeptunian
11 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
2
2
-
mcmzs5
11 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
1
1
Great advice, Joybird. It really needed to be said.
The best answer isn't always the answer that sounds nice and reassuring and sometimes the best answer doesn't solve the problem but the best answer is THE best answer =/ I'd like to say divorce and go live a happy life, but the reality is, being married and not entirely happy sounds much better than being a single mum with four young children, even if the custody, child support and alimony hearings work out. Four children... good god I don't know how some women do it as single parents...
--
joybird
11 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
0
0
I've already been through this with my sister who had 4 kids under 6yo and the husband had the house up for repossession and cleaned out all the kids' bank accounts as well as their joint account. It also cost her $60,000 in lawyers' and court fees!! She was ok though coz I was way ahead of that b@stard - this girl sounds like she's on her own.
Poor mcmzs5 seems to think her husband would worry about her taking up with another man. Where the hell would she ever be able to go to in order to meet one? Not only that, does she really think she's a great catch? All a new man knows is that she's not a virgin but few want an 'instant family' to support.
The OP has made her bed and is just going to have to lie in it for the next 10 years for the sake of these kids' welfare. She'll still be young enough in 10 years time if she wants another man.
Put your kids first regardless of your sexual pleasure with your husband.
Chill out girl and be glad the man is even on the scene!
Thanku fort your advise..I think this was the best advise today..