Is it normal to want to be married??

91% Normal
7 Comments

I am 24 and in a relationship with the most caring and considerate man I've ever met! I have a 2 year old little girl that he is wonderful with and truly loves him as well! When we started dating he made it clear that he would never get married again and didn't want any children of his own. At the time I was a single parent fresh out of a bad relationship and wasn't ready to jump into anything overly commiting either. We have been together for almost a year now and we have fallen completely in love with eachother but im starting to have second thoughts about wanting more children and geting married. I don't want to scare him away but this is something that is important to me and im not sure if I can be with him for the rest of my life without being able to call him my husband. Im not sure how o go about expressing these feelings to him without causing problems in our realtionship.

Voting Results
91% Normal
Based on 35 votes (32 yes)
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Comments ( 7 )
  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    Would you stay with him, if you knew today, for certain, that he would never marry you in the future?
    Is being married more important to you, than being with him but staying common-law? It is not wrong for you to want marriage. Actually it's pretty normal, but if it's not what he wants and he will never give that to you, then do you really want to be with him for several more years, only to break up so that you can find someone who will marry you.

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  • joybird
    12 years ago

    It's too soon to think about marriage coz the first year is all lovey dovey and you are both too young as well. He will not have changed his mind in this short period of time. Anyway, your brains haven't even developed until you're over 25 so wait until then.

    It's a long time from the church to the grave, if you really want it to last.

    I never thought about getting married, then suddenly I'd went out with my husband 6 years - we are married over 20 years now, and it flew in.

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  • [Old Memory]
    12 years ago

    It sounds like your reason for being with him has changed and his hasn't. It's time to move on.

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  • littlelulu1999
    12 years ago

    The time you spend wondering if he'll change (and most men don't), is time you could be spending with someone that has similar needs/goals as yourself. Some things you can compromise on (furniture, the color of your dishes). BIG THINGS like kids and marriage you cannot compromise on. He told you up front how he feels about kids and marriage and these are BIG issues. This is not aligned with what you want. Stop being afraid of losing him, and realize that you need to find someone that is aligned with the major issues. Break up now, before wasting more time...move on...there are plenty of fish in the sea.

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  • Dillanfire
    12 years ago

    Main point - talk to him about how he sees the relationship developing and if marriage is a possibility. Also ask him about kids. Be frank because you dont want to go on with a relationship if it's not heading towards what you want or will compromise with.

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  • thatstrangegirl
    12 years ago

    Don't tell him this yet, he may be scared off if you haven't been together that long. Wait about a year and the mention it in passing.

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  • shockwave13
    12 years ago

    Whats the point of dating someone if you know you will never marry? Isnt the only reason you date someone because you see the qualities of a potential soul mate in them?

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