I think everyone has in-laws that are insufferable. As an adult, you don't have to put up with it because you have your own place and control who comes and goes in your life.
Once you are an adult and don't live at home, it's not unreasonable to cut off ties with those family members who are abusive. It doesn't mean you don't ever speak to them again, but you don't have to include them in your regular daily life.
If your boyfriend has his own job, there's no reason for him to stay at home, especially if he's being dumped on.
Is it normal to use your son?
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Normal, but not very nice.
I think everyone has in-laws that are insufferable. As an adult, you don't have to put up with it because you have your own place and control who comes and goes in your life.
Once you are an adult and don't live at home, it's not unreasonable to cut off ties with those family members who are abusive. It doesn't mean you don't ever speak to them again, but you don't have to include them in your regular daily life.
If your boyfriend has his own job, there's no reason for him to stay at home, especially if he's being dumped on.