I lived his life only I'd to raise 4 younger siblings for my rotten hateful mother!! When I got a student grant she insisted I pay all her utilities - even though I had moved out. My husband of 22+ years is a strong person and so she hates him! He is also the black sheep of his family as his mother only likes her daughters - which is great coz she doesn't visit!
I know exactly how to handle this bitch!! But some of this may be hard to do as you're young and female. Most young females want to rant and rave but I've learnt from my experience of over 20+ years ;o)
1. NEVER ever mention her name - at home or to other family members! Not just so that you don't offend your bf, or drag up old memories for him, or come across as nasty too, but so that you don't make her important in your lives!
2. Ignore her calls completely.
3. If she does happen to catch you on the phone, answer by saying 'Yes?' not 'hello' - that puts her off guard and makes her tell you straight away what she wants. Cut her short with, "Have to go."
4. In a phone conversation, only answer her with yes or no. Do not get into a discussion of why or what, or use any minimal encouragers such as hmmm or uhuh etc - even if it leaves long silences. (My mother in law hasn't rang me house in 3 years coz I did this).
5. Tell her your bf is not in and if she asks why you didn't tell him she called before, just say you forgot :o) She can't abuse you, you're not her child!
6. Get your bf to put her on a special tune on his phone so he knows who it is and doesn't answer. He should say his phone is playing up and texts aren't getting through if any other family members ask him ;o)
This almost goes against the grain coz I have a teenage son who I love dearly but I would NEVER treat him like that and would expect to be ostracised if I did.
It's very hard for him to stand up for himself after years of being browbeaten, also he has deep loyalties as he's seen what she's had to do to raise him and his sister. My gran used to say, "Never go looking for trouble, it will find you" so I've taken this to the nth degree. We NEVER initiate contact with our mums, we don't send birthday cards (they don't send me us either) or even Christmas cards / presents. Let her get on with her life and you two get on with yours!! Maybe buy the 10 yo something small though!?
Do your best to protect him from this bitch and you two will live happily ever after coz he will admire your strength.
Remember too, that the less he does, the more he will be thought of!! She will appreciate him more when she doesn't see or hear from him.
Come back to me if you need any more little tricks to handle this selfish bitch!!
Is it normal to use your son?
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I lived his life only I'd to raise 4 younger siblings for my rotten hateful mother!! When I got a student grant she insisted I pay all her utilities - even though I had moved out. My husband of 22+ years is a strong person and so she hates him! He is also the black sheep of his family as his mother only likes her daughters - which is great coz she doesn't visit!
I know exactly how to handle this bitch!! But some of this may be hard to do as you're young and female. Most young females want to rant and rave but I've learnt from my experience of over 20+ years ;o)
1. NEVER ever mention her name - at home or to other family members! Not just so that you don't offend your bf, or drag up old memories for him, or come across as nasty too, but so that you don't make her important in your lives!
2. Ignore her calls completely.
3. If she does happen to catch you on the phone, answer by saying 'Yes?' not 'hello' - that puts her off guard and makes her tell you straight away what she wants. Cut her short with, "Have to go."
4. In a phone conversation, only answer her with yes or no. Do not get into a discussion of why or what, or use any minimal encouragers such as hmmm or uhuh etc - even if it leaves long silences. (My mother in law hasn't rang me house in 3 years coz I did this).
5. Tell her your bf is not in and if she asks why you didn't tell him she called before, just say you forgot :o) She can't abuse you, you're not her child!
6. Get your bf to put her on a special tune on his phone so he knows who it is and doesn't answer. He should say his phone is playing up and texts aren't getting through if any other family members ask him ;o)
This almost goes against the grain coz I have a teenage son who I love dearly but I would NEVER treat him like that and would expect to be ostracised if I did.
It's very hard for him to stand up for himself after years of being browbeaten, also he has deep loyalties as he's seen what she's had to do to raise him and his sister. My gran used to say, "Never go looking for trouble, it will find you" so I've taken this to the nth degree. We NEVER initiate contact with our mums, we don't send birthday cards (they don't send me us either) or even Christmas cards / presents. Let her get on with her life and you two get on with yours!! Maybe buy the 10 yo something small though!?
Do your best to protect him from this bitch and you two will live happily ever after coz he will admire your strength.
Remember too, that the less he does, the more he will be thought of!! She will appreciate him more when she doesn't see or hear from him.
Come back to me if you need any more little tricks to handle this selfish bitch!!
Good luck to you both!