Anger is one of the stages of the grieving process. It has to have an outlet somewhere (both for you and your cousin). When my grandma died, the phone call came at 2am. I snuck out of the house and eventually virtually collapsed in a playing field. When I'd got over the shock (which made me feel sicker than I've ever done in my life), I started punching the ground in fury. Over two hours, I mashed hell out of that field. And when it was over, and it was all out of me, I went back to my family, who - for whatever reason - were standing in the back garden, watching the sun rise and not really talking.
I know things are different for you, but hopefully you see some parallels. And, finally, I'm really truly sorry you're going through this.
Is it normal to to be angry at god for the death of loved ones?
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Anger is one of the stages of the grieving process. It has to have an outlet somewhere (both for you and your cousin). When my grandma died, the phone call came at 2am. I snuck out of the house and eventually virtually collapsed in a playing field. When I'd got over the shock (which made me feel sicker than I've ever done in my life), I started punching the ground in fury. Over two hours, I mashed hell out of that field. And when it was over, and it was all out of me, I went back to my family, who - for whatever reason - were standing in the back garden, watching the sun rise and not really talking.
I know things are different for you, but hopefully you see some parallels. And, finally, I'm really truly sorry you're going through this.