I also feel like my "friends" just talk to me to be nice or use me for something. It has led me to trust no one. So please don't end up like that! Get to know them a bit more to see if they're truly after friendship!
I am right with you there. I have been brought up like that so I'm already there - but have been questioning these thoughts.
I think what happens is that as we believe these things about what others are thinking about us, we effect a self-fulfilling prophecy and we act towards them as though these beliefs were true - eventually, causing the people in our lives to think "he/she is not nice to me, I'm going to start limiting my interaction with him/her".
At the end of the day, why did someone talk to YOU in that moment? They could have not spoken to you at all, or if they really needed to speak to someone, they could have spoken to somebody else (there are billions of people to choose from!) So I think you should tell yourself that they picked YOU, and remember friendships are malleable, they fluctuate, and if you're more relaxed around others they will like you more and gravitate to you more.
IIN to think people don't like me EVEN if they keep speaking to me?
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I also feel like my "friends" just talk to me to be nice or use me for something. It has led me to trust no one. So please don't end up like that! Get to know them a bit more to see if they're truly after friendship!
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habithabit
11 years ago
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I am right with you there. I have been brought up like that so I'm already there - but have been questioning these thoughts.
I think what happens is that as we believe these things about what others are thinking about us, we effect a self-fulfilling prophecy and we act towards them as though these beliefs were true - eventually, causing the people in our lives to think "he/she is not nice to me, I'm going to start limiting my interaction with him/her".
At the end of the day, why did someone talk to YOU in that moment? They could have not spoken to you at all, or if they really needed to speak to someone, they could have spoken to somebody else (there are billions of people to choose from!) So I think you should tell yourself that they picked YOU, and remember friendships are malleable, they fluctuate, and if you're more relaxed around others they will like you more and gravitate to you more.
:-)