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I think about dying everday but I dont feel I am suicidal as I would never pursue my thoughts. I think life would be easier then i will rationalise and realize im being stupid. But everyday the thought is guranteed to come into my mind
I think about dying all the time, too. I would not kill myself either. I love my friends and family, and I would not want to make them sad by killing myself. Also, killing yourself is probably terrifying and painful. Besides, you never know when things might turn around and completely surprise you. Life has enough little happinesses here and there to keep me going most of the time. I doubt people I know have any idea how much time I spend thinking about death and how much I do not enjoy life.
Secretly, I think about not being alive anymore many times per week. A lot of things make me really upset and hopeless. I get very overwhelmed, and it seems like nothing will make it better and there is no point - just no point at all in going forward. I probably sound like a college freshman who has just read about nihilism for the first time, which is lame, but I really just get so overwhelmed by everything all around me and the futility and the meaningless of it all. It makes me want to give up. Despite having wonderful parents, other relatives, and friends, I feel very alone.
We all go through phases and different times in our lives, though. If you have nothing else, you can always cling to your best friend in life: the fact that very little is certain and the future is wildly unpredictable. I've noticed a lot of people (even myself sometimes) think that present circumstances are predictive of the permanent future. Similarly, people look to a sequence of events (getting dumped three relationships in a row, or having zero relationship experience) and assume that it means something, especially that the future will always be the same as the past. You may not be surprised every day, but surprising things happen. Like I said, you never know when things will turn around. I will keep living in hopes of finding a good reason to live.
Wish me luck.
You're not suicidal so that's a plus. Death has peaked the curiosity of many, however, try not be a casualty of this curiosity.
think about how you might die every day is something good, and is one of the first paths to find enlightenment. it will help you let all your material needs go, so you can think more about the happiness of being alive and not depending of material objects and superficiality, so it is not normal, but it is good, and its something we all should do.
i have come to terms with these thoughts, they dont try to get me killed and i dont try to shut them out, its a win-win situation for the thoughts and I. i often think of ways i could die and 1000 ways to die is one of my favourite shows because i can just imagine me being in their shoes. i think thoughts of suicide and dying is great, idk about you but for me, these thoughts help me calm down and think about things, they mellow me out now THAT is not normal, i know im not normal and i have come to terms with that as well, so a few suicidal thoughts on your part is nothing compared to me. my point being, you have nothing to worry about.
I feel the same way. The only thing keeping me alive is my faith. Without that I would end it all.