Is it normal to still feel nervous around my boyfriend?

82% Normal
3 Comments

I have been together with my boyfriend for 5 months and he is my first relationship. I'm 22 and he is 29. Several times I have felt nervous, tense and uncomfortable around him both before meeting him and while spending time together. It's because I'm scared of not knowing what to talk about when I will meet him and I get that gut feeling that something isn't right and I freeze up and feel ill.

Then I try to figure out something to say and it makes me even more quiet than what I already am and sometimes I have had to plan the day before what I will talk about with him when we first meet and during the time we spend together. He can also easily read my body language when I don't feel well so I can't hide that feeling for him.

We are pretty different from each others and don't have so much incommon so instead we have focused on the physical parts of the relationship more since the communication isn't that great between us. He has still accepted me for who I am though and tried to focus on the good things we have.

We have talked about this and I will do my best to avoid that nervous feeling and believe that it will work out instead of having doubts about our relationship and not listen to that gut feeling and focus more on the positive aspects of it and hope it will disappear more after some time. Is it normal to feel this way?

Voting Results
82% Normal
Based on 28 votes (23 yes)
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Comments ( 3 )
  • Keepsake
    7 years ago

    By physical aspects of a relationship, I hope you don't just mean sex. And if your gut is saying something isn't right, be VERY careful. You can blame it on nervousness, but gut instincts are, surprisingly, a good indicator for trouble.

    If you have trouble speaking aloud, maybe try texting him more often. As silly as it sounds, it can at least give you some practice with speaking, which can then transfer to conversations in real life.

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    • beccie555
      7 years ago

      I mean other activities besides sex too. We use it as another way to communicate. I know that the gut feeling is there for a reason but it can be wrong too because of negative thoughts. A lot of things I experience with him are new for me.

      He said himself that he had have doubts before too but decided to put those doubts away and focus on the positive parts of the relationship. I have texted him many times before which I found as some help in our conversations.

      What we do have incommon is that we both are very nice, Vikings, similar interests in movies, we are both open for trying new things and we can discuss our problems and worries with each others.

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  • Angelandme
    7 years ago

    Me and angel felt odd too at first, we agree we aren't like other couples. I'd say we have less in common than most couples but whatever we do have in common is strongly built into the core of who we are. I don't like giving people srs opinions but for relationship advice there is one thing people tend to overlook and I will tell you.
    It doesn't matter what society wants two people to be, or how you were raised to believe by your parents, family and community two people should act around each other. That guys should be a certain way and women another that words should be spoken often and silence is an I'll omen.
    Never forgot that happiness comes in all forms.
    I venture to ask not what you two are or how you two behave and whether it's the way boyfriend and gf act but more importantly
    Are you happy with him?

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